Difference of opinion with dh on this.
Dh feels its a good thing to tell our 9 year old son that he can't rely on us to feed and clothe him forever. He thinks ds needs to realise that one day he WILL be leaving home, whether he likes it or not. He won't still sitting here eating his supper in front of the TV aged 40, so the harder he tries, the better behaved he is and and the more he learns, the more chances he'll have of getting a good job and a nice life etc etc etc.
I think this puts unnecessary pressure on my son and robs him of childhood innocence. Also, I am in no hurry for our children to fly the nest. Dh disagrees. He says he is looking forward to it His parents made him join the navy on his 16th birthday after he was expelled from school. He said it was the best thing they could have done given the way he was, and he never felt they had stopped loving him or wouldn't give him a home in an emergency. Times have changed and he wouldn't do this to a 16 year old, but the principle remains.
My heart sinks when dh starts telling our son that he can't expect a home with us forever and dh knows this - we just disagree! Incidently my son seems to take dh's ranting in his stride and does not seem upset. They have a very close and loving relationship. Ds probably doesn't believe him .....
Anyway, I just wondered who tells their child that they don't have a permanent home with them and they must make their own way in the world. Is this a good thing to say or not?
For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.
Parenting
Do you tell your child they can't live with you forever?
tigermoth · 10/07/2003 22:38
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