DS aged 4 is using the F word, help

[rookiemater]

Recently DS has come out with the F word. The first time, I thought I had misheard, second time I calmly stated "We don't use that word in our house" only to be told that "We do use it at nursery X taught me it"

Arrgh, definitely nursery induced as in the holidays he didn't use it at all, but when he got frustrated he used it this afternoon. Have taken his toys off him for a day for use before, but feel annoyed with nursery because if he wasn't hearing it then he wouldn't be using it. We are very careful not to swear at home and it is definitely not from ourselves or the childminder.

Should I say something to nursery, I know the boys name ?

Also DS is very friendly with him and wants to invite him round to play at our house. I'm sure it is not the boys fault but I would rather not invite round the boy who taught DS to swear.

How do I stop him swearing ?

[Compost]

difficult one. I distinctly remember dd saying the same word at 4. I was mortified. But not alot you can do about it except tell him it is not a nice word and he must not say it.

That could go either way though, he may say it all the more, or stop saying it altogether. Wait til he gets to school, all sorts of dreadful words come back. I am afraid it is something most of us face at some time or other.

[Tortington]

make him write it out

when he spells it wrong

make him do it againspelling it right

then when he does and it isn't neat, make him do it again.

i caught my kids writing it on their bedroom wall - so i made them write it again, on the wall spelt correctly. it takes the fun out of it.

RE: the boy, its only 'fuck' its not like he is a secret terrorist for the IRA. presuming the other kid is 4 and not 24, stop being precious

[Shaz10]

When my nephew started saying it I said that wasn't as bad as

[Jamieandhismagictorch]

I agree. Ignore for now.

Try replacing it with another word. When you get frustrated with something, say "Rats", or "Drat" or "Sugar" really loudly. See if he copies that.

I sympathise - at 4 DS1 said loudly " I'm trying to get my FUCKING shoes on" when we were hurrying him out of a busy Pub Garden. Ignoring was hard, but it has not become part of his regular vocabulary.

He's 9 now, and know when and where swearing is appropriate and when and where it's not.

[jafina]

My ds came out with "fuck's sake" at 4, twas very embarrassing when he did it in front of my mil.

Ignore Ignore Ignore is the best way to deal with bad language in such a young child. If he sees that he gets a rise out of you when he says it then he will do it for the rest of his life!!! My ds stopped after 4 or 5 times and I made sure I stopped saying it as well

Pixie's advise is very good if he uses it in sentences.....

[rookiemater]

Ok thanks folks I'm sure DH will have fun thinking of random obscure made up non swear word for us and I will do the rephrasing.

Custardo, he is only just 4 and can't spell yet, otherwise it might be an approach.

I know I am being precious, I feel frustrated because we are so careful not to swear and its annoying that he has picked it up anyway.

[Jamieandhismagictorch]

......... and that's parenting for you

[cory]

Only contact the nursery mentioning the other boy's name if you are prepared for the other parents to do the same when your own ds goes on and teaches the word to them. And for your ds never to be invited to any more playdates because he is now using the word. Sauce for the gander, sauce for the goose.

The other boy is only repeating a word he has heard (could be anywhere- on the bus, from older cousins, in the supermarket). Your ds is doing exactly the same. You can't have one ostracised without the other.

The thing is, our children will come across bad behaviour all over the place. It is our job to teach them to behave anyway.

[ilovemydogandmrobama]

Word replacement. Find something that sounds similar, like, 'fork' or something and if/when, he says it again, say, 'oh, did you mean, 'fork? You should have said!'

Be sure and tell nursery the word you've replaced it with, in case he repeats it there.

[SlartyBartFast]

my dd did the same at aged 4,
somehow i changed it to fiddlesticks
i think by pretending fiddlesticks was worse