co sleeping how to

[cantthinkofname]

Hello,
I'm a newbie here, and my due date is coming fast on 31.3., just a day after full moon so fingers crossed I won't have to wait too long.
I'm planning to co sleep with my baby and bought a bedside cot as well. However, my question is about having the baby in our bed with me. I know that I can't prop my baby's head by a pillow, but what about the duvet? Obviously I will need to keep warm, so how do I manage to put duvet across myself and at the same time keep it off the baby (I'm assuming that's what I need to do). The baby will be in a sleeping bag, so do I put him on top of the duvet next to me with any additional baby blankets on top of him should he need it?
Please let me know any of you expereinced co sleeping parents.
Many thanks!
Eva

[BessieBoots]

I think that duvets are a no-no. I'd put bub on top of the duvet in a sleeping bag.

[rubyslippers]

you can't put a baby in a sleeping bag immediately (they have to be over a certain weight)

with my DD she would be on one side of the bed away from the pillows and duvet with cellular blankets over her

meanwhile i would tuck the duvet around myself

when it was time for a feed i would unwrap myself and latch her on and when she was done i would roll myself away from her

i would also use a moses basket next to me and swaddle her up if she had trouble settling

[cantthinkofname]

Thanks for your tips, I just wanted to make sure that I know what I'm doing. Btw., the sleeping bag said that it is suitable from birth, but I guess as you said it depends on the weight of the baby. I think from 3,5kg upwards it's ok.

[BertieBotts]

I wouldn't put the sleeping bag on top of the duvet, because I was worried it was dangerous (duvets reflect body heat so risk of overheating, duvets are also much softer and looser than a sheet stretched over a mattress so could be a suffocation risk) and also I found it easier to have DS cuddled up right next to me, he used to fall asleep on the breast. I didn't feel comfortable rolling away from him when he was tiny because the closer I was to him, the more aware I was of him, even in my sleep.

To keep warm I used to pull the duvet over my legs and up against my back. I would also wear long sleeved pyjamas and on colder nights a dressing gown, hooded zip up top or fleece, etc. I dressed DS in a sleepsuit and vest and put a folded cotton cellular blanket over him, I also pulled this over to cover my tummy which was quite often exposed. He was born in October and this was fine all through the winter, so should definitely be fine for Spring/Summer!

Once DS got a bit older and I was starting to get fed up of the back/hip pain from sleeping in the same position all night (I usually roll all over) I started to scoot him away from me when he had fed, into his little space in the bedside cot. Around this time I also started using the baby sleeping bags, because I wasn't close enough to him or aware enough to him to adjust his blankets all the time as the temperature dropped in the night or as he kicked them off etc. Having him in the bedside cot was great as I could cuddle DP, sleep on my front, sleep facing away from him, anything, but he was still close enough to feed without too much disturbance.

Also my biggest tip for co-sleeping: Buy a waterproof mattress protector (a decent one not a horrible crinkly sweaty one) - has saved our mattress from blood, sick, milk, wee, poo and knocked over drinks/bowl of water (nappy changing). Much cheaper than a new mattress and when DS is ill it's nice to have one less thing to worry about.

[Gubbins]

I would put my duaghter on a pillowcase so when she has finished feeding I could haul her up to between our heads and we would shuffle down under the duvet. It also meant any posset or nappy leaks only meant washing a pillowcase, not the whole double sheet.

[DownyEmerald]

I banned the duvet, and somehow despite being a duvet over the shoulders person normally, managed with just a sheet that I always kept under my arms (sometimes a blanket on my bottom half). DD was born in March so it wasn't even summer.

I don't know how it worked without me freezing, but it did, so might be worth a try.

[cantthinkofname]

Thanks so much to all of you, I'm really learning from this. I'd like to especially thank to BertieBotts for a great detailed explanation. I like the idea of being close to my baby and always felt that the duvet wouldn't allow it being quite thick and as you said the closer you are to your baby, the more aware you are of him.