Night terrors - what are they exactly?

[superdeeduper]

Might sound like a daft question but are they different from general bad dreams and what causes them?

My youngest has never been a great sleeper but in the last couple of months she seems to have gotten worse. Bedtime routine is good, usual bath/supper/quiet time/bedtime story then falls off to sleep no probs. But she does seem to cry a lot through her sleep. Some mornings she can even wake up quite early crying and moaning.

She is a very happy, confident child of 3 who is also very articulate for her age so able to talk about worries/fears etc. She is very bright tho with a vivid imagination. She just seems like a different child through the night. She can seem really upset in her sleep at times tho.

No major changes to her life, getting on great at nursery, like I said, really happy wee girl who is outgoing. Any suggestions as to what could be causing this?

[Wigeon]

Sorry to hear about your DD. This is a really helpful explanation.

And here's some info on nightmares.

Afraid I don't have any advice but hope someone comes along soon with some proper advice.

[MumMeh]

Poor you. I have no idea what might be causing it, but it doesn't sound like night terrors. DS had them, and they involved him screaming and thrashing with his eyes wide open - but he didn't seem to be aware of anything around him, including us. It was as if he was asleep with his eyes open. It was very scary: it was like the worst possible tantrum, only he wasn't aware of what he was doing. The episodes would last for around 30 minutes; we used to turn the lights on and carry him round the garden. Eventually it would susbisde and we would tuck him up again. He would have no recollection of it in the morning.

I hope someone has some suggestions for you!

[ThatVikRinA22]

yes they are different.

my dd had them from about 3 years old. it absolutely terrified me. she would seem to be awake but was still dreaming - i once ended up a complete wreck in the middle of the night bacuse she was screaming "mummy" and when i tried to touch her she crawled away screaming "your not my mummy" - she was hysterical. absolutely awful. i have no idea what she was seeing but it wasnt me.

we stopped it by waking her up before we went to bed. its more likely to happen at a certain stage of sleep - so if you disrupt their sleep pattern by gently waking them up it stops it happening. it worked for us.

she grew out of it - its often a phase but its really distressing. try waking her before you go to bed yourself. worth a try.

[MumMeh]

Vicar, that sounds very similar to my DS's ones. I remember him screaming for us, then kicking and screaming 'no, no, no, go away!' and lashing out at us when went to him. He didn't even recognise us. They were dreadful. He started when he was a toddler, but fortunately he also grew out of it. He still rears up in bed sometimes and talks, but with no hysteria!

[MollieO]

Ds has had them since he was 6 months and he is now nearly 6. They always occur between 10.30 pm and midnight. He gets up (obviously not when he was little) and is absolutely hysterical and inconsolable. I usually find him wandering around in his bedroom or at the top of the stairs. He has no idea that I am there and cannot communicate at all, although his eyes are open and he is talking (can never understand what he says). Sometimes he is pointing and staring at something (never know what that is either).

All I do is talk to him and reassure him that I am there and try and hold him in the hope it may help to wake him up. They last about 15 mins and then he is out like a light. We have a few weeks of no night terrors and then weeks where they happen every night or every other night. No idea what triggers them.

I don't think crying or moaning in sleep is night terrors. Ime night terrors seems to be quite a violent occurrence - sobbing, screaming etc.

[LynetteScavo]

You would know if your child was having night terrors...they are quite scary for parents.

Ds would be physically shaking, and looking ahead and flapping his hands.

I once woke DS up because I was trying to comfort him, but it just meant he remembered the dream in the morning, and kept talking about it for day. (apparently everything was really big and he was very small)

If he didn't wake, he had no idea in the morning it had happened.

[Ceebee74]

Doesn't sound like night terrors to me either.

Ds1 had them from birth until he was about 2 (I think) - as the others have described except because he was in his cot, he would be sat up, eyes open, crying but not awake iyswim. He wouldn't take his dummy and he would only calm down in his own time - we used to take him into our bed and just lie with him and let him thrash around or whatever until he was ok again and settled. They also always used to happen between about 9-11pm - never any other time of night.

[Slickbird]

Both my DD's have had and the youngest is currently still haing Night terrors - like Mummeh said, they sit up, scream, thrash around, heart racing and can get v hot - eventually it subsides and they come to a bit and then with a wee cuddle will go back to sleep. They know nothing of it in the morning. My youngest DD is 2 and she has been having them on and off for a while - esp if she is hot, ill or had a really busy time before bed. The advice is NOT NOT NOT to put the light on or try and interact with them. This is very hard as it goes against the intinct, but apparently you can 'add to it'and make it worse. The trick is to stay low and out of sight to make sure they don't hur themselves. It's very common in kids under 5 and should eventually pass.

Nightmares are different in that they need you to comfort them and can remember what the dream has been about.

Distressing to watch tho.

MolliO Just read your reply - if your son gets them at a regular time and frequently, the book I have suggests waking them 15 mins before you think one might happen (maybe see them getting hotter or agitated) and then resettle them - do this for a few days and it has been shown to stop them. The prob I have with my two year old is she tends to have them once a week and there is no set pattern.

HTH.

[Slickbird]

Sorry about spelling errors, the memory in my computer is sh*t and doesn't keep up with my typing.

That's my excuse anyway.

[superdeeduper]

Thank you everyone for your replies. I should have added in my first post that DD does thrash around in bed, kicking and screaming out. She never remembers any of it in the morning.

Having spoken to HV we do think it is night terrors although no idea what triggers them. There seems to be conflicting advice about waking the child up before one happens. There doesn't really seem to be much can be done about them except wait for her to grow out of them. Good to hear from other parents tho who are experiencing this and knowing that I'm doing nothing wrong.

One thing the HV did mention was if they don't get better the GP could prescribe medication, something I would be completely opposed to and found a bit scary really at the thought of a 3 year old being put on meds.

[Slickbird]

Not sure why your child would need meds for them? As long as your child doesn't hurtle themselves into furniture (which they can do) but I can't see why a child just can't be left to grow out of them. It is, as I said, hellish to watch (and put up with) but as the child is non-the-wiser, I can't see why meds would be the answer. Aparently it's something to do with the brain not being able to process all the information in the growing brain which is why it often (but not always) appears in infants. My DD1 only had them for a few weeks where as DD2 has had them on and off for a few months. Try just to ride with it. And hold your nerve!