Thinking of baby no 3 - should we or not?

[2babyblues]

My husband and I really want another child but when we think about it in a practical way we both get cold feet. He comes from a family with 3 children so I think it seems normal to him to have 3. I just have a brother but always was a bit lonely and would have liked another sibling and always imagined having 3.

My two sons are wonderful (well they have their moments!) and are playing so well together now it almost seems like there wouldn't be a place for another sibling and he/she may get left out, esp. as there would be a bigger age gap between them and the youngest.

We also want to move somewhere bigger which would be practical for having another child, but then to pay for it I would need to work more hours which wouldn't really be possible with another child.

My husbands family live miles away but we visit them a lot and I think this could also be really hard with 3.

I am also a bit worried about the whole trying for a baby thing again with the fear of MC, or not conceiving at all.

Sorry this doesn't make a lot of sense. Basically we are both broody but hesitant! Anyone else in our situation?

[Tryharder]

Yeah I am in your situation. I have 2 boys and a third child is hellishly impractical (car not big enough, house not big enough, DH works away from home, not enough money, not enough time for 3 children etc etc)

But we thought sod it and I am pregnant with DC3. If I ponder on the practicalities (like where will DC3 sleep???) I will go mad so I am being philosophical about it - life has a way of working out for the best.

That's my theory anyway.

[2babyblues]

Thank you for replying to my post. Congratulations and all the best with baby no. 3!!! I think if we do have another we will have to be like you and just go for it!!!! Taking the philosopical approach I think that we will regret it later if we don't and we would never regret having a baby once it is here. Maybe we will move first and then see how everything is then.

[misshardbroom]

It's like that with every baby though. Imagine you're thinking of TTC no.1 and you weigh it up:

no sleep
body gone to hell in a handcart
strain on relationship
mess all over house
probable damage to career / economic prospects
cost of raising them
potential heartbreak if anything goes wrong at any point along the line (pre or post birth)

You'd never do it, would you?

If you both want one then deep down you've probably made your decision.

Also, I wouldn't worry about the relationship between your children, IME their bonds flex and grow and change in different ways as they reach different stages anyway.

But then, I am slightly biased as I say this as a besotted mother of 3, who I would never be without, even though they're driving me crackers on their snow day today!