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Parenting

Boys and girls wearing kilts

162 replies

Ally68 · 02/01/2010 16:58

Hi
My dilemma is to do with the very cold weather we are having. When our children were very young, we made the decision to ensure that they grew up disciplined and smart. One of our rules is that both our boy and girl look smart for church on Sundays, and to that end, to reflect our Scottish heritage, they both wear kilts for this and other formal occasions.
Because of the cold weather, our daughter has been wearing thick cotton tights and boots with her kilt, whereas our son has to make do with knee length socks.
He continues to moan he is cold, and thinks that the fact his sister is allowed to wear tights is unfair, and wants to wear trousers. We have been resistant as once he starts wearing trousers, it'll be hard to change back.
Do you think we are being unfair, as its only for a couple of hours and although the kilt is a childs kilt, and not as warm as a mans, it shouldn't be that chilly?
We'd be interested to hear what others think.

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poinsettydawg · 02/01/2010 16:59

seriously?

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seeker · 02/01/2010 17:14

You are joking, aren't you?

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Lulumama · 02/01/2010 17:19

i thikn part of being a good parent is knowing when to compromise. and if your children are too cold/too hot, it is appropriate and correct to adjust their clothing accordingly

i presume you dress according to the weather?

you can be smart and formal without wearing a kilt

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Wiseoldelf · 02/01/2010 17:37

Hahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

ffs

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Ally68 · 02/01/2010 17:38

No, I'm afraid I'm not joking. Kilts are proper formal wear for boys and my husband and I are proudly Scottish. We want our kids to be aware of their heritage and can't see any problem in insisting he wears a kilt for formal occasions. It doesn't do him any harm and he looks very smart. We realise many Scottish boys never wear a kilt, but that's the choice of their parents. Obviously, the replies here imply we are being unreasonable- but to say I am joking is a bit much!

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mumhadenough · 02/01/2010 17:42

You are subjecting your son to the freezing cold just to maintain your views on being proudly Scottish (I'm proudly Scottish too btw).

However, you can be proudly Scottish in other ways and allow your son to wear a nice smart suit or something to church. He doesn't need to freeze to death! Instill your views on smart dress on him in an easier manner.

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Batteryhuman · 02/01/2010 17:45

Does your husband wear a kilt to church? I thought men mostly only wear kilts to weddings or black tie dos and not weekly? How old is your DS? If he hates wearing the kilt then I would suggest that you should compromise with the poor chap.

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thisparachuteisaknapsack · 02/01/2010 17:47

I think your son is going to grow up thinking his Scottish heritage is a pita, which would be a shame.

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scottishmummy · 02/01/2010 17:53

well being scottish,i think kilt weekly is bitty ott

and the wean is freezin so do compromise.kilt when it isnae brass monkey weather

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KurriKurri · 02/01/2010 17:56

My DH wore a kilt as a little boy, but as others have said, only for weddings etc. Not church every Sunday.

You say it doesn't do him any harm, but he's cold. He could look just as smart in trousers.

I'm sure God already knows you're Scottish, so I doubt he'll be bothered.

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ScottishBoris · 02/01/2010 17:57

Hmmm as a Scottish person who went to church regularly I think you are being more than a bit 'mental'. Kilts aren't usually worn to church, unless (as mentioned earlier) it's a wedding/christening.

How old is your son, surely he must realise that it's not the norm to wear a kilt each Sunday? I'm thinking Calvinism here, are you hoping he will never actually enjoy going to church?

So for what it's worth, I think you should realise that it doesn't actaully matter what your children wear - this isn't what will make them smart/independant/self-sufficient (or whatever). Maybe listening to your ds about something as minor as wearing a kilt will instil the importance of communication and negotiation (a very important and underrated skill IMO).

Otherwise I think you must be taking the piss slightly old-fashioned in your views!

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Shodan · 02/01/2010 17:57

Going to church isn't technically a formal occasion in the same way that a wedding/ball/dinner dance etc is, so wearing a kilt is a bit overkill, imo.

However if you insist on making your boy wear his kilt, get him some thermal underwear. Cut down a pair of long johns.

But frankly I think you'd do better to express your pride in your heritage some warmer way.

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seeker · 02/01/2010 17:57

It's 'the kilt, 'not 'a kilt' if you want to be properly formal!

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expatinscotland · 02/01/2010 17:59

my kids are proudly Scottish, and the eldest and youngest have the peely wally skin to show it.

if i put kilts on them in this weather, they'd be blue.

please wrap up those weans in these temps!

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GentleOtter · 02/01/2010 18:00

If it is part of his school uniform then please take him to be fitted for a heavy wool kilt and thermal underwear underneath plus a warm woollen overcoat.

It is minus 16 in some parts of Scotland so no wonder your bairn is saying he is freezing. Hap the laddie up.

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whoopstheregoesmymerkin · 02/01/2010 18:00

How about tartan trousers instead? My DS had some funky flannel combat styley ones which were warm but still very smart and Scottish.

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Ally68 · 02/01/2010 18:02

No, my husband doesn't wear a kilt to church, so I guess we are guilty of double standards. However, my son doesn't mind wearing a kilt- just moans about the cold weather. To be honest, his sister moans more about having to wear a skirt to church than he ever does about wearing a kilt. I guess the consensus is that he should wear trousers- which would be a shame. Especially, as his sister will now also want to wear trousers. (Before you ask, I always wear a skirt for church).

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IneedacleanerIamalazyslattern · 02/01/2010 18:03

My dd and ds both have kilts both love them but don't wear them weekly think that is a bit much.
Take you back a few years to when my own dad and my uncle were boys.
My Gran made them both wear a kilt to church every week in the same way you do. THe result being that both of them hate kilts and as Adults refuse point blank to wear them as they hold far too many horrid memories of being forced to and freezing in church as children. SOmething neither of them remember fondly.

As others have said even the proudly Scottish amongst us you are actually inflicting this on your poor ds and not only that he is freezing for it.
If you feel that strongly about it why not get him a pair of trews for such occasions.

I agree though that weekly for church is possibly a bit much and he can still look smart and handsome with a suit or trousers and shirt.

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meltedmarsbars · 02/01/2010 18:03

I wore a kilt to church on sundays come rain sun or snow.

Kids these days are soft! (except my dd1 who is wearing shorts even in this weather)

How about hiding shorts underneath?

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MadamDeathstare · 02/01/2010 18:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

scottishmummy · 02/01/2010 18:05

oh no tartan trews are for americans and daft tourists

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expatinscotland · 02/01/2010 18:05

DH only wears his for weddings, funerals, events like that.

But then, we don't go to church except for such occassions.

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Ally68 · 02/01/2010 18:05

Yes, we are old fashioned in our views- is that so wrong?

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scottishmummy · 02/01/2010 18:06

all views need some flexibility and compromise.dont be too rigid

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GentleOtter · 02/01/2010 18:06

The other worry is that the councils appear to be grippy with the salt this winter and it would be terribly painful if he slipped and all that bare skin....

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