Playdate stress

[babartheelephant]

Just had quite a stressful playdate. My 3 year old started nursery in September. He seemed quite attached to another little boy. So we had a few playdates and I got on relly well with the other family and I thought it was all going really well. But recently the other little boy has been less nice and today he called my ds names, hit, pushed, scratched, destroyed his things, generally misbehaved. I really really like the other parents. Would you stop having playdates with them? My ds tries to stand up for himself but looks at me with sad eyes like I am betraying him by having them round. He never hits back and he forgives very quickly. He even said he enjoyed it afterwards. What do you think?

[Rebecca41]

How awful.

Did the other boy's parents notice and say anything? Is there any obvious reason for this change?

If I were you I'd ask the nursery staff if your DS and this boy still play much together, because friendships can be very transient at this age. It may be that the friendship has run its course.

I certainly wouldn't want to spend time regularly with a child who was that mean to my DS. I know boys like a bit of rough-and-tumble, but this sounds a bit more than that.

[babartheelephant]

Yes, the other dad was brilliant and talked to him calmy and said it wasnt nice but he just kept doing it. Then there were moments of niceness, but they were pretty shortlived today. I reckon they aren't destined to be great friends sadly. When I was settling my ds into nursery, I was very atracted to this other little boy because he seemed very sweet and gentle, and would often come to me if I was there with my ds. Anyway, I guess it's one of those things. This is 3rd time for me, I've got 2 older ones, so I thought I wouldn't be foxed by something like this, but it presented me with real dilemma. My other 2 kids think I am mad to invite them over if he is unkind to their little brother.