Getting kids to eat more....OPINIONS PLEASE!!

[SpawnChorus]

DD (4) is an absolutely terrible eater. She's now right down at the bottom of the centile charts.

What do you think of:

a) not letting her leave the table until she's eaten all/most of her (small) meal.


b) telling her that she if she leaves the food it will be given to her at the next meal.

Thanks

[VerityBrulee]

There was a fantastic thread about this a few months ago. It made a huge difference to my life!

Hold on I will try to find it

[choosyfloosy]

Is there anything she likes to eat at all?

I would go with a) but would make it truly tiny (but balanced) and she has to clear the lot. Really it would be miniscule - 3 peas, 1 piece of pasta, 6 cheese shreds, 1 sliver of carrot.

Will be interested to read other results.

[TheFoosa]

I commiserate, my dd is 7 and tonight we made spag bol together, but she refused to even try it

It's very frustrating, isn't it?

I wouldn't try b) of your suggestions though as it would end in a huge battle which I feel is best avoided

I found little & often worked best at that age, but I admit that I have found it very stressful at times and now I go for the easy option

[VerityBrulee]

Here it is, really worth a read.

Good luck

[SpawnChorus]

Verity - thanks you I'm off to have a squizz at that. It looks v good!

I should add that we have mainly been v laid back about her eating habits, but that in the last couple of months we've taken a harder line (e.g. insisting that she eats a few bites of her main course before having any pudding, and more recently not doing pudding at all). We've also tried a sticker chart.

Since then she's gone from being quite skinny, to postively emaciated-looking.

[MrsHappy]

If my DD (aged 3) leaves all (or nearly all) of her food and I know it is something she likes then it does often appear at the next meal or the next day. I don't think this makes a massive amount of difference to how much she eats.

What has helped a bit is getting her involved in preparing meals. It has made food more fun and got her more interested generally.

[SpawnChorus]

OK I'm going to come clean. I started this thread to resolve a dispute with DH.

He thinks either of these options are perfectly reasonable. I think they're pretty cruel.

I kind of thought I'd get a deluge of posters frothing at the mouth and telling me I'm a child abuser.

[TheFoosa]

my dd also got very skinny with the hard line approach, she really wouldn't eat

and the cooking thing really dosen't work here, she often helps me cook but will not try the food

[SpawnChorus]

Foosa - same here...grr.

[whomovedmychocolate]

Will she drink milk shake with protein powder and banana in? Seriously, DD went for a week with refusing to eat and just drank and drank and we gave her milkshakes and didn't comment. Then went back onto eating in her normal picky way (but ironically gained two pounds on the milkshakes alone ).

[EccentricaGallumbits]

neither. tried both over the last 11 years with my DD and neither work. just give inand let her eat biscuits and bread.

[TheFoosa]

this is why i get pissed off with smuggery 'oh my kid's will eat ANYTHING and if your kids don't then you are a really crap parent' type threads (not that you see them here, of course ) because when you are dealing with it several times a day EVERY day then it really wears you down.

[MyCatIsABiggerBastardThanYours]

I wouldn't do either to be honest. I had both done to me as a kid and it really did nothing at all to make me eat up my food.

Food might be becoming a battle ground for her so I would thninkg yhou need to tkae away the stress. Praise her for every little bit she eats; ignore the other behaviour; eat meals together so she sees how to behave. Not sure what else.

I chilled out hugely about my DD's eating when I realised that, over a wk or so she ate a very balanced diet, somedays it was sod all and others it was good amounts.Once I calmed down, so did she and she now eats pretty well.

I hope htings sort out fo ryou soon.

[GoddessInTheKitchen]

cruel? but letting her starve is ok?

[TheFoosa]

oh Ecccentrica, tell me you weren't joking because I think I love you

[mollyroger]

verity, which tips especially, helped change your life?

[MmeLindt]

Not keen on either tactic as you are setting up mealtimes to be a battle ground.

[MmeLindt]

Agree with letting her eat what she will and trying again and again (without pressure) to try new things.

[EccentricaGallumbits]

not joking. DDs diet is shocking. I HAVE TRIED! so there.

[GoddessInTheKitchen]

honestly its either you give in or the child gives in. its not really a battle is it? you just make her sit there until she eats it all, no need to get stressed.

op used the word emaciated! that doesn't sound healthy, she needs to eat something

is there food that she likes? could you start by giving her that with new stuff occasionally and in tiny pieces?

[SpawnChorus]

Goddess - I've always been told that a child won't let him/herself starve. Obviously I'm beginning to doubt this now!

[MmeLindt]

I can remember sitting at the dinner table chewing and chewing on a bit of beef for an aaage before sneaking to the loo to spit it out.

Not particularly healthy and it put me off beef for ages.

[Merle]

My son is very picky. He was on the 8th centile a few years back. We have made some progress over the years. It has helped for him to be very active; he'll tend to be more adventurous because he is hungry and then he gets lots of praise for this. I was forced to eat certain foods when I was a child and I would not do this to him; it made for some awful mealtimes when I was younger. I don't think (a)or (b) are useful approaches; not something that I would impose on myself.