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Ridiculous things you've said to your kids!

(71 Posts)
Lilybunny Mon 09-Nov-09 13:28:00

Yesterday I was in a real hurry to get out of the house and sent my dd (4) to quickly get ready. She came back dressed but moaning that she couldn't find a pair of socks. My response?
"Well just find some the same colour!".

It got me thinking about the daft stuff we say to our kinds, especially under pressure! I'd love to hear some more. Anyone want to share?

GooseyLoosey Mon 09-Nov-09 13:29:31

Not one from me but from mil to dh. They had bearly enough money to survive on and dh had just taken an apple from the kitchen. His mother shouted at him "do you think they grow on trees".

Rubyrubyruby Mon 09-Nov-09 13:31:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LittleHarrysMum Mon 09-Nov-09 13:31:58

Said to my 3 yo DS the other day when he was whinging about getting dressed

'"Stop being such a baby"

But the best was from him to me & DH while we were have a barney about what clothes to put DD in hmm and he said "Just calm down you two!"

gemmummy Mon 09-Nov-09 13:33:16

DS, get out of the washing machine....

"You either come out of the cat's [travel] box now or I'll have to lock you in and you leave you there"

cece Mon 09-Nov-09 13:40:44


Lilybunny Mon 09-Nov-09 13:44:43

Keep them coming! LOL at Youknownothing.

StealthPolarBear Mon 09-Nov-09 13:48:13

I sometimes catch myself talking to 8 week old DD the same as 2yo DS, so if she's crying I might say "I'll just be a minute" and expect her to understand, or if we're all on the sofa and I'm feeding her "stop kicking your brother"

Lilybunny Mon 09-Nov-09 17:00:30


SmallSCREAMCap Mon 09-Nov-09 17:06:54

<sets volume at 11> "Don't you EVER, EVER, EVER, throw Goofy at the steering wheel again!"

Well, you try negotiating a crossroads with a lanky cartoon character tangled around your indicator stick.

Hullygully Mon 09-Nov-09 17:08:49

I'm not going to tell you what to do, but I do want you to make the right choice.

Tidey Mon 09-Nov-09 17:11:20

I told DS that children who lie get black spots on their tongue. blush

itsmeolord Mon 09-Nov-09 17:12:07

Hullygully - was that to a very small baby? grin

"Have it if you want it but don't let me see you."

whilst dd was asking for second biscuit whilst we were sat round the kitchen table.Biscuit tin was in front of me.

displayuntilbestbefore Mon 09-Nov-09 17:12:08

Stop eating with your mouth full

Lilybunny Mon 09-Nov-09 17:17:52

Tidey - my friend told her lo that her tongue went blue when she lied. She was very blush when many years later she had to explain to a teacher why her dd kept on poking out her tongue to prove her honesty!

madoldbat Mon 09-Nov-09 17:31:42

In the early days of DH2 DSS2 was about 6 and used to bolt his food like he was going to catch a train. One day when he was busily shovelling baked beans down his throat I told him he would choke if he carried on eating that rate. For the next 18 months every meal took at least 45 mins and he was the despair of us all. It wasn't until 12 or 13 yrs later he told us why he used to take so long. blush bigtime

grammar Mon 09-Nov-09 17:36:32

3 children to Mummy,' Can we start Mummy?' 'No' says Mummy with mouth full.

Hulababy Mon 09-Nov-09 17:43:35

Have, before now, heard myself say something daft to DD such as

"You had better eating those chips up before you can have dessert"

when dessert has been fresh fruit salad! Yes, because we all know that chips are so much more nutricious than fruit!!!

JackBauer Mon 09-Nov-09 17:46:03

What are you doing? What are you, 3?
-Yes mummy.blush

I'm not going to ask you again to stop.
-Okay - carried on playing

blondiep14 Mon 09-Nov-09 18:39:59

My mum used to say to me when I lost anything; "If I find it before you do, you're in BIG trouble".
Why???!!! Surely it was just good it got found?!

Tidey Mon 09-Nov-09 18:58:22

LOL Lilybunny, I probably shouldn't say that again then, I don't fancy having to explain it to his rather scary teacher!

porkypoo Mon 09-Nov-09 19:16:20

DD was just having a glass of milk and digestive biscuit before getting ready for bed, she was stalling so then I said 'go and eat your pyjamas!' hmm

sammummy2007 Mon 09-Nov-09 19:30:27

To 18 month old fruit-o-holic child after he'd eaten the best part of a bunch of grapes, "NO you can't have any more! Have a biscuit or something instead". Oops.

ib Mon 09-Nov-09 20:05:21

'Will you stop acting like a two-year-old!' to ds who is ....erm....two blush

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