Help please1 My DD1 is 5 and very anxious. She won't join in with games unless she can win, but doesn't have a tantrum so much as get very distressed and cries a lot. i always thought it was more normal to lose and then have the tantrum, not to anticipate losing and so not join in. It makes parties very stressful! Also, she struggles to get dressed in the morning because she doesn't know what to wear, and again gets very upset. She thinks she has to have particular clothes for particular activities and gets upset when she doesn't have the right thing. It's as if she is just so overwhelmed that she is paralysed into inaction. We have tried reassuring her, and giving lots of hugs. We have tried explainging to her; she is not daft and has a good understanding; and I confess that after trying to coax her for up to an hour to do something, I have shouted. It's making life very difficult for all of us. my younger DD is the exact opposite, and just gets on with things.