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'Who Knows Best - Mother or TV?'

(15 Posts)
suedonim Wed 15-Jun-05 16:38:40

Do you think parenting programmes are useful or not? This article Who Knows Best - Mummy or TV is sceptical about the benefits. I'll confess, I haven't seen any of the parenting programmes as I'm a fully paid up member of the 'Just Muddling Through' club so I'm wondering what other parents think about this subject.

beansprout Wed 15-Jun-05 16:46:18

I don't think it has to be an either/or thing. Clearly there are some useful principles and techniques used by Dr Tanya et al, but then again, no-one knows your kids like you and you (and only you) can know what is best for your family. But of course, that wouldn't make such good copy. Much better to try and whip up some sort of backlash!

Fran1 Wed 15-Jun-05 16:47:53

I (as a mother) and i like to watch the programmes so i can nod in agreement with the experts and go at the parents.

SoupDragon Wed 15-Jun-05 16:49:06

Oh, our TV knows best. It can amuse my children for hours whereas they're bored with me in less than 5 minutes.

But I suspect that's not what you meant

Fran1 Wed 15-Jun-05 17:00:10

Sorry i meant to say i know best first of all! and then i like to watch the programmes ...

motherinferior Wed 15-Jun-05 17:01:03

I very VERY rarely know even any better, let alone best.

FairyMum Wed 15-Jun-05 17:04:58

I think the programmes can be helpful, but there are plenty of books you can read about how to manage toddler tantrums etc which are equally useful. I don't like these programmes because I think it's unethical to display children and their bad behaviour like this. Also, I think it's just as important to learn that this age is chaotic and you can't learn to manage your children perfectly as if you were their boss.

Twiglett Wed 15-Jun-05 17:12:33

My TV knows everything

suedonim Wed 15-Jun-05 17:19:55

Lol, Soupie. The real reason I haven't seen any of the progs is that dd is always glued to the telly.

crunchie Wed 15-Jun-05 17:26:45

Well I certianly learn the odd tip from these programme. Supernanny had some good ideas for me - going down to the child's level etc. That I wouldn't have 'got' by myself.

Also my newphew has CERTAINLY been helped by these programmes. He has real problems with allergies and food and not only cannot eat much, he wouldn't eat by himself. He is 3 in a week and had NEVER fed himself. The dr's keep suggesting things like feeding him by a drip as he still doesn't gain weight, and were threatening to get him in hospital to fatten him up. The only 'advice' they gave SIL was to buy a deep fat fryer and fry everything!!

They watched the Hous eof Tiny Tearaways and saw a child how wouldn't eat. He had food phobia and did exactly the same as DN. He wouldn't even touch food. 2 months on, DN will happily smear ketchup around his face and will eat a whole meal by HIMSELF and although still has allergies is now putting on weight.

Moral is mum/dr's don't always know best and these programmes can help

bundle Wed 15-Jun-05 17:28:43

I saw a mother literally crawl under the table where her dd was having a tantrum..and I thought "oh she's feeding that tantrum" (a la Tania, on tiny tearaways) and boy, did it carry on for ages. i literally had to bite my tongue

SoupDragon Wed 15-Jun-05 18:41:00

I think the TV programmes do know best but only in a general way. Some tricks won't work with your child, some will - that's where the parents' knowledge comes in. You can read all the books, watch all the TV programmes but still not find the right "switch" to modify your child's behaviour and then along comes some new Super Nanny and ping! on goes that lightbulb and you think he/she's a genius...

LunarSea Wed 15-Jun-05 22:21:21

Well they're good for boosting your parenting confidence by making you feel "at least mine's not that bad"!

FairyMum Wed 15-Jun-05 22:28:58

Lunarsea, that's what I mean though. People watch these programmes and think what badly behaved children and probably blame the useless parents. I have seen some parents on Little Angels who I wonder if they should ever have been allowed to breed. But for all I know, it can be clever editing. I wonder if the people who go on it feel slightly taken advantage of sometimes. I think media is ruthless and noone asks if the children wants to be paraded on national tv like that......I think these programmes are probably good for people who would never read a book, but at the same time I think they are just reality tv with small children and I don't like that. I know I am probably off track on this thread now.....

lilaclotus Wed 15-Jun-05 22:34:37

it's a very interesting article. i find them useful but i do wonder how my parenting would be if i hadn't watched them or read that stack of parenting books. either way, i have a happy loving caring daughter who is becoming more independent and tantrum free every day, whether that is down to watching 'little angels' and 'supernanny', i honestly don't know.

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