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Ex - Partners

(5 Posts)
JellyBeen Fri 09-Oct-09 22:34:11

I'm currently having a civil but tense, text discussion with my ex and he's just informed me my 17 year old daughter and I quote 'She has seen all of your texts by request, its her legal right to as she is allowed by law'
Suggestions please

Spero Fri 09-Oct-09 22:37:43

There is no law of which I am aware which says you may show your ex's text messages to your daughter???

This isn't a legal issue. it doesn't sound a very good idea to try to sort things out via text especially if your child is getting dragged in.

Can you see a mediator? or at least have a face to face discussion?

this kind of thing is a recipe for disaster, and I know this from both personal and professional experience.

HeBewitcheditude Fri 09-Oct-09 22:42:12

God what a prick.

He's trying to justify using his daughter as ammunition by citing a non-existent law?

How fucking base.

JellyBeen Fri 09-Oct-09 23:26:35

Can you see a mediator? or at least have a face to face discussion?

Thanks Spero, tried mediation he decided to lose his temper and quit as the mediator brought my current partner into the discussion.

I've gone back to him and said look this is between you and i and i'd appreciate it if you kept it that way.

"just a side note, my daughter doesn't speak to me, she's very loyal to her father, i keep trying to build bridges, but i've had solicitors letters and phone calls from the police telling me to back off since she was 16 years old"

My 18 year old was booted out by him as she wanted to have contact with me (she now lives with me) and the youngest, my 10 year old shes curently in the hands of cafcass and the courts

Spero Mon 12-Oct-09 13:42:30

sorry to hear this. It sounds completely toxic and unpleasant for everyone.

If you are getting letters from the police saying back off then I'm afraid that is what you have to do. I am sure that when she is given some space and time to think things thru she will realise there are always two sides to every story. She sounds like she doesn't need any more hassle from either of you trying to get her 'on side'.

The 10 year old could be faced with many more years of this horribleness. If she is in hands of CAFCASS etc, can't you just leave it there? Why do you have to be texting your ex?

Say you will contact him directly if and only if there is an emergency regarding one of the children about which he needs to be informed. Otherwise it really sounds like neither of you can handle direct contact with one another at the moment.

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