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What is your ideal number of children, and what would the age gaps be??

(50 Posts)
slinging Sat 26-Sep-09 13:16:17

Funny as I live surrounded by families of 2 children, yet teach in a very middle class area full of families with at least 3 children. Keen to hear your thoughts!

Ambi Sat 26-Sep-09 13:18:29

I always wanted 3 as it seems a nice easy balance, but I'm satisfied with one.

Ambi Sat 26-Sep-09 13:19:07

sorry, make that just about coping satisfied

gingertoo Sat 26-Sep-09 13:20:59

Want 4.
Have got 3 (10,8,2)
Liked the idea of two big ones and two small ones but it's taking ages to conceive #4 and the gap is widening....

Caro1302 Sat 26-Sep-09 20:43:30

I've got 2 with a 2.5 year age gap. Ideally I'd like 3, with another 2.5 year age gap, however DD is only 8 weeks old so I may change my mind about that!

ib Sat 26-Sep-09 20:47:12

I would have chosen 3, with an 18-24 month gap between.

As it is ds1 will be over 3yo when ds2 is born. Unlikely to get to no.3 - it's a bit too long to spend on the baby years for me.

PinkTulips Sat 26-Sep-09 20:47:54

i'd have loved 4/5, all close together, but even if dp were in agreement i can't do pregnancy again, i barely made it through the last one and it was unfair on the kids how grouchy and miserable and incapable of dong anything i was.

as it is i'm pleasently surprised to find i'm actually content with 3... i didn't think i would be but i am.

we have 4 years between oldest and youngest and it's great

4andnotout Sat 26-Sep-09 20:52:54

I would love 5 or 6 with 18 month gaps roughly.

We have 4 dd's (7,4,2,11m)

TheFallenMadonna Sat 26-Sep-09 20:56:20

Had I started younger I might have had another, but I'm pretty happy with two. I'm not sure I'm organised enough for more. Mine are 2.5 years apart, longer than I had aimed for, but not a bad gap.

lechatnoir Sat 26-Sep-09 22:56:34

I have DS1 age 3.5 and DS2 age 3mths and would love a 3rd & final DC before DS2 hits 2.

Despite getting pg straightaway with DS1, it took us a while with DS2 & I had a m/c in between so bigger gap than I had hoped and now DH is saying he doesn't want more so who know what the reality will ultimately be.
LCN

MogTheForgetfulCat Sat 26-Sep-09 22:59:36

I'd like 4 (but realistically, will be happy to stick at 3 - don't want to be too old...) Have 2 years between DS1 and DS2 and found that quite hard periodically, so would go for gap of up to 3 years between DS2 and DC3. Working on DC3 now smile - well, not right now, obviously. I can't do multi-tasking that well.

zebramummy Sun 27-Sep-09 21:57:04

i love having one and it feels a 100pc the way it should be - everyday i tell myself that there must be something wrong with me for only wanting one esp since dh would love another one and i am not even in my mid thirties yet and face no fertility/financial/relationship obstacles at all...however, i always always wanted just one. i have no idea if i shall change my mind itf- if i do, it will prob be a real spur-of-the-moment decision; motivated by my desire to enrich ds' life and stop him chatting to the vacuum cleaner!

nomoresleep Mon 28-Sep-09 10:58:06

Wanted 3 with small age gaps - 18 months/2 years. In fact, I have 2 with a four year gap. We won't have a third now - our babies don't sleep/nap and I cant go through any more years of extreme sleep deprivation/constant effort to get babies to nap.

Interesting what you said about teaching in a middle class area where people seem to have 3 or more kids. It does seem that all the yummy mummies where I live have 3 kids.

IwishIwasmoreorganised Mon 28-Sep-09 11:03:57

I'd like 3.

Have got 2 with 2 1/2 years between them and we had in mind to have a similar sized gap again, but I think financially number 3 will have to wait a bit longer. Childcare for 2 dc 3 days a week is costing us £940 a month atm so we need to ensure ds1 will be in full time school before number 3 arrives, even then it'll be tight.

TheFoosa Mon 28-Sep-09 11:24:42

I would have liked 4, 2yr age gaps beyween each

I have one grin because I now realise that reality is so much different from fantasy

Scorps Mon 28-Sep-09 11:26:57

4 dc, with smallish age gaps

I have 3 and one due Xmas day. There is a 3.5yr gap between dc2 and dc3, which i wish was about a year smaller, but apart from that pretty much have what i want.

tummytickler Mon 28-Sep-09 11:36:13

I have 4 dc's 8,6,4 and 2 years.
We want 2 more, hopefully dc5 by the end of 2010, and dc6 in 2012. Hopefully! Or maybe dc6 in 2014 so dc5 would be at school and i could enjoy a bayhood with them, but then i would be much olde, harder to get pg etc. Ho hum! might just leave it to nature to make the decision for us!

whensmydayoff Mon 28-Sep-09 13:24:07

Id love 3 with 2.5 year age gaps.
I have one DS and one due in Jan so there will be a 2 year 7 month gap between them....pretty much on track so far smile!
Only problem is, I had placenta previa with first and a section, if I need a section with this one I was advised a third would be dangerous.
Something to do with the combination of placenta previa and sections plus age and number of children bla bla. Fingers crossed its a natural birth.

lovechoc Sat 03-Oct-09 20:43:53

I would love to have two children with a 2.5 year age gap..

But I have one and he is 2.6yrs now and I'm not pg yet, so looks like my dreams have been dashed in regards to age gaps.

Still, I county my blessings to have the one child that I do have, who is happy and healthy.

isittooearlyforgin Sat 03-Oct-09 21:09:12

have got 2 with 2.7 age gap but would have preferred 3 years so one was at preschool while could entertain --sleep with-- the other, but now often think that would like even bigger age gap so could pay full attention to dd1, but isn't the grass always greener - the two of them, in between early killing each other, played so nicely for such a long time in dd1's bedroom and at a soft paly place ran around together while i read the guardian!! Wih i could use puncutation;

IWantToLiveOnAFarm Sat 03-Oct-09 21:10:21

We have 3 with 2.4 years and 22 months between them.

Would have liked 5 and would have liked a much closer gap.

isittooearlyforgin Sat 03-Oct-09 21:12:53

omg! am so jealous of your staying power, invincible parenting; can barely manage with two - am so impressed. If you're really after 5 I have 2 that i can rent out on an hourly basis (only think police might crack down on me if we did!!)

IWantToLiveOnAFarm Sat 03-Oct-09 21:14:04

LOL as I am a terrible parent.

isittooearlyforgin Sat 03-Oct-09 21:14:58

absolutely not - ou've gone into the fray I am in awe

clemette Sat 03-Oct-09 21:16:49

I would have liked four with a 3 year gap between each. I have two with the requisite gap but won't have any more because I HATE being a mother to babies. If they came out aged one I would only stop when nature dictated!
Sadly, my marriage/family/life/sanity cannot cope with any more newborns.

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