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3 yr old DD will NOT play with toys

(7 Posts)
needacupoftea Sun 23-Aug-09 11:39:26

My 3 yr old DD will not play with toys. She says she 'can't'. DH and I find this v odd and hard to deal with. Neither of us seem to have had this problem when we were little and none of her friends struggle either. She has a fantastic imagination but will not play on her own. I am at home with her every day - but she will start nursery 3 days in Sept in has benn going to playschool and toddler groups. Am hoping nursery will help. At home we do lots - play doh, sticking, colouring, painting, baking, picture pairs, dominoes etc and I always try to encourage her to play on her own with her toys - shops, dolls house, toy buggy, chalks outside, skipping, you name it it's encouraged and NOTHING works. She would rather sit looking bored whilst I clean the windows, write letters, pay bills etc. Is this normal? What can we do?

SolidGoldBrass Sun 23-Aug-09 11:43:34

Why shouldn't she sit and look bored if that's what she wants to do? She doesn't have to behave like 'other children', she's herself.
If would be different if she was actively unhappy, or was breaking up the house instead of playing with her toys, but maybe she is just happy to make up stories or think her own thoughts.

JiminyCricket Sun 23-Aug-09 11:48:12

normal i think. my dd1 needs people to interact with, she's an extrovert. she would rather hewr toys were 'in order' and tidy than actually played with. her lil sis will play on her own for hours. she hasd learnt a bit of play from friends over the years. however, she is the life and soul of the party in the play ground and a great people person. Also she's really into craft, drawing, writing etc and will spend time alone doing these (she is 5). your dd might get into this as she's older. I also find if I spend ten mins doing something with her first, she's then much more likely to get inspired and find something to do, for a while at least.

shootfromthehip Sun 23-Aug-09 11:51:29

My DD was exactly the same- she had to do activity focused crafts rather than playing with dolls/ kitchens/ farms eg all the expensive plastic crap that we bought for her. She is very arty and only really wanted to make things/ colour in/ cut things up at 3. Nursery was very good for her with structured play and now at 5 she will play with her dolls etc.

DS on the other hand has played independantly with stuff like garages/ jigsaws and all the plastic crap since 18mths.

It may be a gender thing, it may be their personalities but I do find girls more demamnding of your time/ interaction at that age.

Acinonyx Sun 23-Aug-09 13:40:55

DD 4 is like this. The only thing she will do sort of alone (with nearby commenting) is drawing/sticking/colouring type stuff. I've stopped buying toys. Otherwise if I am busy she will sit forlornly sucking her thumb until I come back to play.

colditz Sun 23-Aug-09 13:41:59

better that she won't play with toys that won't play with people.

needacupoftea Sun 30-Aug-09 15:58:15

Acinonyx - This is exactly the same! V reassuring to know that we are not alone. Thank you all.

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