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Sudden new and strange toddler tantrums.

(5 Posts)
difficultdecision Wed 12-Aug-09 12:30:27

In the space of a week our normally placid 19m old DS has started becoming inconsolable at anything that doesn't go his way. He is not tired, ill or hungry and although he does have some molars squeezing through they cut a few weeks ago and nothing else on the teething scene - calpol makes no difference which it did with teething tantrums.

It is happening many times a day, because he has finished drying his hands and it is time t get down, because I won't put his shoes on indoors, because he wanted that piece of tissue, because I won't let him hit the fishtank. All things that were completely distractable non issues a week ago (minor strop but would stop as soon as I ignored it). Now he sobs with tears running down his face, walking away, ignoring, laughing, distracting all have no impact and if I pick him up he eventually settles after about 10 minutes.

Any advice?

meep Wed 12-Aug-09 12:36:06

come and read this thread - all part of the rich tapestry of life for little people.

I handle each melt down differently - some I ignore, some I distract, some I laugh. Some need to be left to run their course with a big cuddle at the end. It's not easy (for us or them!)

difficultdecision Wed 12-Aug-09 13:15:20

thanks meep, it's a great thread. How do you work out which to ignore/distract or cuddle? previously it's been obvious but he sounds genuinely upset now.

Your right, it's not easy.

meep Wed 12-Aug-09 13:26:03

I think I distract first - then ignore - and most of them end up with a cuddle at the end once she's calmed down. I'm lucky in that I just get mini-meltdowns - only had one or two full on tantrums, the most memorable being in a John Lewis cafe all because my Mum dared to offer her a banana.

I think the minimeltdowns are now so much part of our life now that I hardly notice them.

Dd1 is now 2.3yo. If it is a meltdown where I really need her to do something ie/climb the stairs I say that I will count to 3 and if she doesn't do it herself I will pick her up. It works 8 times out of 10.

I've also learnt to pick my battles - if what she wants to do is not going to harm her, me, the house or dd2 then I let her get on with it and ignore!

frazzledgirl Wed 12-Aug-09 14:34:41

I actually came onto this board to make pretty much the same post!

DS was 2 last week. Normally delightful, articulate, sweet-tempered.

I have just spent 10 mins dealing with the grief and rage that resulted from me confiscating the crisps (Organix carrot sticks so not even very nice) he'd nicked from my bag and offering a biscuit in exchange. Refused with squeals of outrage.

After several minutes wailing, running round the flat and weeping BECAUSE HE HASN'T GOT THE BISCUIT, NOT THE CRISPS!, he has apologised and asked for the biscuit. Now happy.

I tend to distract first, but if he kicks off I explain he won't get whatever it is till he's calm, put him somewhere safe and ignore him till he is.

But jeez it takes it out of you.

Please someone just tell me when it ends...

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