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Putting baby in their own room

(11 Posts)
roseability Sat 08-Aug-09 09:08:49

My DD is 8 weeks and not sleeping very well. Although I wouldn't expect her to sleep through the night at this stage she is waking every 1.5-2 hours every night. She has had the odd good night but not many. She isn't hungry (she is BF) as sometimes she doesn't seem that keen to feed and usually she goes back to sleep quite easily but it is still exhausting!

She is sleeping in a beside crib (that attaches to our bed) or next to me as I wanted to co-sleep this time. I thought it would make her sleep better!

However when I go to bed it disturbs her and I wonder if I am waking her or she smells my milk and wakens? My DH keeps suggesting we put her in her own room but she seems so young, I can't bear the thought of it. However I am pretty sleep deprived and have a 3 year old to look after as well.

Any suggestions? Maybe it is normal for an 8 weeks old to wake this much but my DS was sleeping much better at this stage

FlamingoBingo Sat 08-Aug-09 10:03:47

A baby is at quite a higher risk of SIDS if you put them in their own room before 6m of age.

Not sure what the answer is, but just wanted to point out the danger aspect of sleeping separately.

llareggub Sat 08-Aug-09 10:05:58

I think it is quite normal. At that age they still want feeding and to be held a lot. My DS2 is 14 weeks and he settled down to a good stretch of sleep about 5 weeks ago, and he is still in with is. He sleeps better when he is in our bed.

juuule Sat 08-Aug-09 10:10:29

Does the bedside crib have to attach to your bed or could it be self-contained. That way she is still in your room but maybe less chance of you waking her.

At that age we still had ours in moses basket downstairs with us until we went to bed when we would carry up and put moses basket into the cot in our room.

We have had babies that wake every 2hours though. Some just do that. I normally took them into bed with me. Sometimes if they were fast asleep, I would move back into the moses basket. Other times keep at the side of me.

I wouldn't put a baby under 6m in their own room particularly since we nearly lost one dd at 8w and probably would have done had she not been in with us.

Just bear with it and it will get better even if it doesn't seem that way at the moment.
Try to catch up with your sleep whenever you can.

roseability Sat 08-Aug-09 10:47:50

Thanks guys! Will show my DH this thread!

TBH I think he thinks he will get more sex shock. What is it about men and their need for sex overiding everything else!

I instinctively know that she should stay with me and that she will sleep longer in her own good time. I think I need to rest more though so will enlist help where possible.

Juule if you don't mind me asking when did you put yours into their own room?

juuule Sat 08-Aug-09 10:54:26

Any time after 6m depending on the child.
We have kept some of them in with us until about 2.5 before now though. Depended when the next one was born for some

roseability Sat 08-Aug-09 11:01:30

I always feel guilty about putting DS in his own room at 3 months. He was sleeping through the night (I realise now how lucky we were!) but I had PND and thus felt tired all the time anyway. I thought it would help if he was in his own room.

This time I definately don't have PND and I really enjoy my baby. I really want to keep her with us until 6 months. I suspect it osn't me that wakens her but this is just her natural pattern for now

roseability Sat 08-Aug-09 11:04:39

For those kids that you kept with you until they were older, did you have trouble getting them to go to their own bed?

I am an avid fan of the continuum concept and like the idea that kids will eventually go to their own bed of their own accord. However I don't think I could persuade my DH to let her stay with us until she is that old!

juuule Sat 08-Aug-09 12:21:28

Only problems we had was getting the eldest into his own bed/room because he didn't want to be on his own.
Of course, it was easier to move 2nd onwards
out as they didn't have to be in a room on their own.

And one of our dds but she just wanted to be near us and would probably have been the same if she'd been put into her own room from early on, maybe worse.

One or two have gone through phases of wanting to get into our bed but that has just been a phase and doesn't seem related to how long they spent in our room.

juuule Sat 08-Aug-09 12:23:44

Thinking about it, the ones who were in with us the longest were the easiest to move into their own beds.

phdlife Sat 08-Aug-09 12:28:51

roseability you have my sympathies - my ds woke every 2hrs (usually for feeding though!) and I can still remember how tiring it was. Fwiw I think putting your dd in her own room might be more tiring, simply because she'll have to shout louder to wake you and you'll have to move further to comfort her. Hope you can find a way.

We kept ds in with us (no choice in that flat really) and he ended up more or less co-sleeping until he was about 20m - then I was too pg to feel comfy having an octopus in bed and he went straight into a bed in his own room, no trouble. (Well, no trouble until he began your standard 2yo bedtime circus routine hmm)

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