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Looking for positive ways for an almost 4 y o boy to vent his anger??

(4 Posts)
SmithTheCat Thu 06-Aug-09 14:21:41

I have a mostly cheerful and quite bright 3 and threequarter y.o. boy and a 18month girl. My son is quite often has grumpy stroppy days and gets very frustrated with life (he's quite convinced he can do everything). Does anyone have any good suggestions for good ways to let off steam. We already talk about things alot and go out to the park come rain or shine. Would anyone recommend a punchbag? Something for him to harmlessly vent some of the general stroppiness which I think is natural in this age-group? I'm hoping to take him to the Little Dragons or TaiKwan-do club but he is still too young to join for quite a while. We already do swimming and fresh-air stuff. I need something for those impromtue occasions where he desperately wants to his something or someone but sits there looking like a volcano about to explode.

becktay Thu 06-Aug-09 21:21:43

We have a bike for our son who is 3 and a half. It's one of those metal ones with no pedals and he zips about on it all day (we are always out as our flat is teeny). Haven't used the buggy for about 4 months now either and he sleeps like a charm cos he's pooped at the end of the day.
My friend lets her boy throw a dolly about when he's angry - she just had a baby!
Does your boy like to draw? Some good old frantic scribbling on a large piece of paper might be fun.

msled Thu 06-Aug-09 21:25:05

Expressing aggression does not make aggression go away. On the contrary, it makes it worse. Distraction, developing strategies for self-control (counting to ten if you want to hit someone, thinking of something else) and using up energy positively are more effective.

stills Wed 19-Aug-09 21:09:35

Just joined MN this evening to get advice for a similar issue - i have a 3 3/4 year old boy and an 18 month old boy. The older one is brilliant - i adore him, could spend hours in his company and to me, he walks on water, but since a 3 night (solo) trip to his granny's a few weeks ago, he's been a little buggar, mainly manifesting itself in a sudden snap followed by physical abuse of me and his little bro. Yesterday and today, he had me in tears after, in a sudden fit of rage over really nothing at all (not letting him watch tv - he doesn't watch much anyway so not such a hardship - and not filling up his bowl of dinner, when it was already half full) punching and kicking me, spitting at me and the final straw - pulling my hair really hard - sounds silly, but it really hurt - the tears were a mixture of pain and utter despair/feelings of uselessness. He's not bothered by treat/toy deprivation or time out, so my tactic has been to try to ignore it - even when he's whacking the sh*t out of me - but then put him to bed early while the baby gets to stay up reading books, which the older boy would love to do. I'm not sure if the behaviour is attributable to tiredness (he has been waking up earlier than usual recently, and usually has no problem doing 7pm - 7.30 am), school holidays and change to routine (although we do a lot in the hols - lots of fun - an outing every day either just to park or further afield), the little brother becoming cuter every day, growing up...I feel that our relationship is quite intense in that it's just me, the 2 kids and my husb, who doesn't see them that much during the work week (isn't that much the same for everyone??) - husb and i both have very close families but not in london and the kids adore and feel very comfortable and loved with each. Hoping it's just a phase ...any ideas?

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