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If you saw someone in the park who was clearly having a bad day and lost it with her DD what would you think

(22 Posts)
memoo Sat 01-Aug-09 23:33:59

She had 4 children all below the age of 10, was heavily pregnant and was clearly having a very bad day.

The kids were being really naughty and wingey and were really testing her patience and then she suddenly lost it, shouted and smacked the eldest child on the leg for repeatedly answering her back.

What would you think of such a person?

Thunderduck Sat 01-Aug-09 23:35:00

I'd think that she was having a bad day and I'd feel sorry that she was.

saadia Sat 01-Aug-09 23:35:24

that she was having a bad day and the dcs were being very annoying - nothing more.

FAQtothefuture Sat 01-Aug-09 23:35:34

I think you??- they were having a really shitty day and hoped they were feeling better soon

hellymelly Sat 01-Aug-09 23:36:47

I would think there but for the grace of God go I ! I have never smacked, but I have shouted far too loudly and handled too roughly when at the end of my tether,and I only have two.

Paolosgirl Sat 01-Aug-09 23:36:49

I'd feel a bit perturbed at the smack, but understand that we all have bad days.

dizzymare Sat 01-Aug-09 23:36:52

I'd hope she had wine at home!

itchyandscratchy Sat 01-Aug-09 23:36:56

why does it matter?

was that you then?
If so, stop worrying about what others might think of you and concentrate on getting some R&R if you can.

potoftea Sat 01-Aug-09 23:37:21

I would think "oh, thank God my 3 are all past that stage now" grin. I would honestly feel very sorry for her, and realise how difficult she must be finding things at the moment.

I really would not think badly of her at all, because looking back to when mine were young, I remember that it was really tough at times.

TheNatty Sat 01-Aug-09 23:38:51

ditto on the you??

late pregnancy makes a bad day the most awful day ever.

i dont judge you, and i am sure other dont too.
those that do? they arnt worth a dime anyway

Greensleeves Sat 01-Aug-09 23:41:09

honestly, I'd wince at the smack and feel sad for the child that got smacked

and think it's sad that people still smack

but I would also feel lots of sympathy for the woman and think she must be having a hell of a day heavily pregnant with 4 children behaving badly

and would wish I could make her a cup of tea and have the kids for a couple of hours

memoo Sat 01-Aug-09 23:45:42

yeah was me sad have had the shitest day ever. I never smack the DC, I don't know what happened today, kids have just worn me down.

Having a difficult pregnancy but trying to get on with it and keep kids entertained. All I wanted to do today was lie in bed but made an effort and took kids to park and all they do is bloody squabble and winge at me.

Was just really gutted that I lashed out, and this woman glared at me for a good 5 minutes after as if I was some kind of child abuser. As if I didn't feel bad enough as it was.

Thanks for nice messages

whomovedmychocolate Sat 01-Aug-09 23:56:38

In your defence, you took them to the park - you had good intentions even if you did lose it with them.

People can be quite judgey with larger families I've noticed. I find just working out whether people are families is hard enough - what with the teens trying to walk 20 yards behind mum wink

One bad day does not change the world, tomorrow will be better. Apparently tomorrow is going to be the last sunny day for a while as well, so enjoy it if you can.

memoo Sun 02-Aug-09 00:03:51

Thanks WMMC,

we have been couped up at home for a week with Sflu, so not been the easiest of weeks. We're all better now and today was the first day we were allowed out.

I did give DD a hug a bit later and tell her I was sorry and just feeling really tired and grumpy. Not that it excuses the smacking though.

Will get out again in the sunshine (fingers crossed) tomorrow and try and have a better day.

whomovedmychocolate Sun 02-Aug-09 00:06:08

memoo - sounds like late pregnancy boot camp to me - it'll be a relief to be in labour to get away from them for a few hours! grin

memoo Sun 02-Aug-09 00:08:48

grin Bring on the pethadine and G+A!!!

MaryMotherOfCheeses Sun 02-Aug-09 00:12:04

I'd have judged the smacking. I'm sorry, but I would.

But you know, you do sound like you've had a rough time. Being stuck in with flu. Heavily pregnant. Whiney kids. Bleeding ell.

But as someone wiser than me says
"Those who mind don't matter
those who matter don't mind."

KTNoo Sun 02-Aug-09 00:38:32

If you've all been ill they're probably more whingey because they're not 100% yet.

Don't be hard on yourself. It was a one-off.

Just because you're anti-smacking in theory doesn't mean you're immune to the red mist (I include myself in that - we all have moments we're not proud of).

Blimey, if I had 4 nearly 5 dcs I'd be an absolute fishwife....very impressed!

lisylisylou Sun 02-Aug-09 22:04:23

Went swimming with the kids the other day and a lady was losing it with her little girl. All the other people were staring at her screaming at her girl and then she burst into tears saying she couldn't take it anymore. I took the lady and little girl into a large family changing room and was talking to the girl just outside the changing room where she could see us both until her mum could sort herself out. I felt so sorry for her.

Gateau Mon 03-Aug-09 10:16:38

I would be a bit judgemental and wonder if smacking was normal practice, but then prbably give myself a good talking to and realise the poor woman was having a hell of a bad day.

msled Mon 03-Aug-09 10:22:29

I saw a woman (orthodox Jewish) with TEN children and PREGNANT yesterday. Mind you they were all angels and I was significantly more grumpy with just my two.
I would feel sad and I hope empathetic. I know what it is like to lose my temper with whinging kids.

TheProfiteroleThief Mon 03-Aug-09 10:30:27

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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