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Is having an easy (non colicy) baby parenting or luck?

(10 Posts)
Reallytired Sun 19-Jul-09 16:54:37

I think its luck. My son was a very challenging baby where as my daughter is one of the easiest babies in the world to look after. Yet the way I have parented both children is very similar.

I know several people who had an easy first baby and then a colicy challenging second baby.

Prehaps difficult babies are difficult for a reason. For example I think my son was born before he was ready. I also had a really long labour.

ChasingSquirrels Sun 19-Jul-09 16:57:48

Mine were the other way round, ds1 couldn't have been easier to look after, and continues to be a very easy child.
ds2 was bloody hard hard hard work.

Just who they are!

Karam Sun 19-Jul-09 17:21:51

I think possibly a bit of both is true.

I think the baby has the personality the baby has got, some babies are happy chappies, others are more uptight and so on...

But I also think that sometimes the way you react to the child can also change things. I know with DD1, I was a lot more uptight about doing everything perfectly, and she was more uptight as a result, whereas with DD2, I was so much more relaxed and confident, and didn't stress about anything - whether she cried or anything, and so she was a lot more chilled out. I think babies can and do pick up on the tension around them (that is what the experts say isn't it?). I certainly think that was true with my DDs.

Jaquelinehyde Sun 19-Jul-09 17:23:05

It's good luck without a doubt.

juuule Sun 19-Jul-09 17:23:53

It's luck.

becktay Sun 19-Jul-09 19:14:27

i think there's a bit of both though mainly luck. you have less of a learning curve 2nd time so you can go with the flow a bit more. looking back i was very precious newborn with ds1. don't have time to be that with ds2 and he is much more chilled out, but i do suspect that he is prob that kind of person too.

MrsBadger Sun 19-Jul-09 20:01:53

if it's not colic it's something else

dd had no digestive issues at all but sleep was another story

a friends' son ate and slept like an angel but had recurrent lung problems

etc etc

dinny Sun 19-Jul-09 21:17:39

agree, it's luck

dd1 was born before she was ready (35 weeks) and was v colicky and cried all the time for about 4 months

ds and dd2 were term and neither have been colicky

BriocheDoree Mon 20-Jul-09 13:08:37

Luck.
DD was the easiest newborn, and a real handful as a toddler (just calming down at 5). DS was a nightmare newbie, silent reflux and not sleeping through the night until 10 mos, and is now a laid back 2 year old dream.

Allegrogirl Mon 20-Jul-09 13:58:44

Luck. We had a hideous first 6 months with a puking, colicky baby. I felt like a useless, failing mother. Post weaning she has been a little ray of sunshine. All I did differently was give her food. I think the cuddling and rocking through the colic days helped her be a happy child later on.

The parenting books that blame lack of routine for all problems are very hurtful to parents living with a 'difficult' baby but the likes of GF strongly imply it's the parents fault.

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