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Struggling to cope with life at the moment.

(13 Posts)
Besom Thu 16-Jul-09 15:12:03

DD is 14 months. She is delightful, happy little girl.

But I'm feeling like a really crap mother because we're sitting here with CBeebies on for hours and we haven't been out for 2 days. I can't get myself moving.

I had PND last year but recovered well with counselling. Unfortunately a couple of weeks ago my dad was rushed to hospital and it now transpires that he has a fairly aggressive form of cancer and is having to have chemo right away. He has been a huge support to me since dd born.

I don't know how to cope with this and still stay cheerful for dd.

MissisBoot Thu 16-Jul-09 15:16:26

You're not a crap mother because you haven't been out for a few days - you obviously need a bit of down time to get your head round what your dad is going through - could you go back and see your counsellor to get you through this time?

How about trying to go out for a little walk this afternoon to the park or something to give you some fresh air. Say to yourself that at 4.00pm you are going to turn off the pc.

Do you have a partner who can help out?

MissisBoot Thu 16-Jul-09 15:17:21

another avenue of support is an organisation called CancerBacup - they provide support for families affected by cancer.

Besom Thu 16-Jul-09 15:26:49

Thanks missiboot. It was a counsellor from a PND project so I'm not sure, but you have just reminded me that there was a help line number they gave me which I could phone.

If this persists, I'll go to the doctor.

DH is not around much in the week due to work but will be around at the weekend, so I'll be able to go see my dad in hospital.

Will try to get out this afternoon.

tootsweets Thu 16-Jul-09 17:24:33


Wondered how you got on this afternoon? Did you manage to get out? It is an effort sometimes but even a 10 minute walk makes you feel better sometimes.

Besom Thu 16-Jul-09 19:34:39

Oh thank you for asking! I phoned friend and we didn't go out but she came round and I guessed she was pregnant so that has cheered me up somewhat.

I will definitely force myself out tomorrow. Feeling a bit more positive.

tootsweets Fri 17-Jul-09 08:16:54

Glad you are feeling more positive. I too am on my own during the week as my dh works away. Had my dc4 9 weeks ago so totally understand how isolating it is sometimes when you haven't spoken to anyone for days.So look forward to weekends!

Besom Fri 17-Jul-09 08:25:57

Yes and today is Friday smile

My dad is usually around in the week, so I'm missing him as well.

Are your dc all young tootsweets?

tootsweets Fri 17-Jul-09 14:34:25

ydes i have 4 dd all under 8! Somedays I feel I cannot cope with it all but have no choice but to keep going! Tough at the mo as dd4 so tiny and not sleeping much. Skipping eldest one's ballet tonight as feel too too tired. Feel guilty about it though. Do you have plans for more dc in future?

Besom Fri 17-Jul-09 19:30:59

Wow, 4 little dd's - you're so lucky! It must be such hard work though. Dd was a terrible sleeper so you have my sympathy there.

We've just started trying to conceive again, mainly because I think it might take a while, although it's quite a thought.

tootsweets Fri 17-Jul-09 19:53:19

It is hard work but I love it! Would have another if dh agreed. Did it take you long ttc your dd? It not it could happen sooner than you think.

Besom Sun 19-Jul-09 10:57:37

Fingers crossed!

tootsweets Sun 19-Jul-09 19:42:35

Mine too for you. Short post as am emptying kitchen. New one being fitted over the next week. Yippee! Have waited years for this!

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