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When (if ever) did your child first say 'I HATE you'?

(18 Posts)
YanknCock Thu 18-Jun-09 14:13:01

Am 30 weeks pregnant with my first, and went for a 3D scan last night. I am suddenly completely in love with the little guy, his chubby face, ginormous feet, the way he yawned at us and curled up in a ball, refusing to move....

Maybe I'm weird, but in the midst of all this I've realised at some point growing up he will probably be very angry with me and might even say he hates me! I know I certainly screamed it at my mother several times during the teenage years, and am now feeling so ashamed.

So how long have I got? A few years? A decade? My sense is that it's not unusual for a child to say it. How do you/did you handle it?

Just the thought of him ever saying it is making me cry--I think pregnancy hormones might be going overtime ATM.

Paolosgirl Thu 18-Jun-09 14:19:30

I can't remember a time when they didn't tell me they hated me! They also tell me they love me, and that I'm the best mummy in the world, and the worst mummy in the world, and that they want to leave home and that they never, ever want to leave home. The list is endless - it's all part and parcel of the lovely drama of their emotions!

I deal with it by saying "well, I love you, darling", wait until they calm down and give them a hug smile

hana Thu 18-Jun-09 14:21:09

dd was 7 (still is 7)

poopscoop Thu 18-Jun-09 14:24:51

exactly the same as paolo - always reply with a 'mummy loves you so much' in a quiet voice. It makes mine feel so bad they always apologise and say they love me too!

Til the next time of course!

Snorbs Thu 18-Jun-09 14:31:36

My DD first said it when she was 6, I think, for some fairly trivial reason. I'll shrug off an awful lot of stuff from the kids but on this occasion I did take DD aside and tell her that she'd hurt my feelings. She was mortified and has never said it since. Interestingly DS, who's approaching 11, has never said it.

YanknCock Thu 18-Jun-09 21:17:59

Is 6-7 pretty average then? Good, I've got some time to toughen up.

Claire2009 Thu 18-Jun-09 21:19:28

Dd is 3.4yo. So far we've had ;

I don't like you anymore
You're not my friend


brendaAndEddie Thu 18-Jun-09 21:19:55

i have never ever ever ver had this

oldest is 11

Snorbs Thu 18-Jun-09 21:27:58

I think, in my DD's case, she tried it out for its potential shock value.

Lizzylou Thu 18-Jun-09 21:31:35

Have two boys, aged 5 and 3, so far have only had "I'm not your friend anymore" and "I'm not going to come into your bed and cuddle you in the morning" (which the 5 year old knows I love.
It's only a matter of time though....
Oh and they always do come and cuddle me and treat me like a Princess (and call me their Beautiful Princess), so just minor blips then.
smile Just enjoy getting to know your baby, it's a wonderful time. Fear not.

OlderNotWiser Thu 18-Jun-09 21:33:36

DS1 told me he didnt like me when he was 2 and a the same breath he also told me 'You is getting on my nerves.'I had to laugh actually...bless him, its quite funny seeing a little lad of that age get cross with you! Plus I guess I know where the latter phrase was picked up from blush...I've tried to be more careful what I mutter under my breath since!

Chatkins Thu 18-Jun-09 21:33:39

dd2 is 5 and says it whenever she is told off for doing something pretty bad, like hitting her younger brother. dd1 is nearly 7 and has only ever said it once. They have very different personalities!
I just take it on the chin, at that age they don't mean it. Maybe different when they are teenagers though!
What's harder to imagine when you are pg with your first, and first hold them etc, is that you will ever be angry with them. I can remember looking at dd1 as a newborn, and thinkin, how could I ever feel anger towards her ? It seemed incomprehensible.

piscesmoon Thu 18-Jun-09 21:34:14

I think it is your hormones! Really-don't worry about it. They don't mean it! As a parent you have to do the unpopular and of course they hate the person who is going to be a spoil sport! The worst thing you can do is take it seriously. You just need a reassuring reply-mine used to be 'that's OK I have enough love for two'. You can laugh about it when they are older-it becomes a family 'in joke'. I'd say that 6 is an average age-they grow out of it.

piscesmoon Thu 18-Jun-09 21:35:13

They also love you to bits and are going to marry you when they grow up-often within the same hour!!

fishie Thu 18-Jun-09 21:36:25

ds is 4yo and says 'you are not my friend' when he is angry. we are a shouty house though and i am sure he will be doing more than that soon. he has discovered door slamming all by himself.

Lizzylou Thu 18-Jun-09 21:39:54

Oh Gosh yes, they do want to marry you too grin

cornsilk Thu 18-Jun-09 21:41:28

Never said they hate me. Ds2 tells me he likes his dad more than me when he's in a mood with me.

ilovetochat Thu 18-Jun-09 21:45:30

dd is almost 2 and says "i a little bit cross", "bloody nora" when things dont go her way and if anyone is miserable she calls them a "grumpy troll" from her dora book.

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