School Sports - reasons you should not enter the Mum's Race.

[snigger]

You will run, in earnest for once, next to the policewoman mother who is very very fit and tall, and you will hit a damp patch of grass in your bare feet, and fall so hard your tits come out of your ears and you give yourself whiplash.

Chariots of Fire it was not.

[ProfYaffle]

Just had to check your profile to make sure you're not in Norfolk, similar happened to a Mum at our school today. She went arse over tit - literally - twice then got up and walked away in a 'what? nothing happened' kind of way.

I, on the other hand, stayed firmly sat on my arse looking after dd2

[FluffyBunnyGoneBad]

Just tell them you have a weak pelvic floor and you wouldn't want them to have to swim to the finish line

[snigger]

I laughed hard, once I could breath again - once you've lost your dignity to that extent there's no point being precious about it

The kid's PE teacher was funny - as he started the race, he warned us against gouging, kicking, or hair-pulling. As I stumbled over the line post-collapse, he said "Taking out the opposition by falling on them was supposed to be out, too".

[DesperateHousewifeToo]

I avoided ds' mums race at sports day today too.

We cheered the others on and suggested that they cheat

For the Dads race we had a competition to decid on the best looking chap and, luckily, he had to run past twice as they were one down in their team

[snigger]

Today, as the whiplash injuries and top-to-toe bruising kicked in, I tried to count my blessings.

I always used to feel for the mothers running against Diana when the press turned up - of course you'd feel you'd have to let her win (and poor her,she probably would have won anyway with those legs), but I bet there must have been at least one uber-competitive mum that really wanted to strap on her spikes and go for it.

I guess I should thank my lucky stars it's only people within my immediate circle that are threatening to put the pictures on youtube