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I don,t know how to handle this any more

(2 Posts)
crazedupmom Sat 07-Feb-09 22:47:43

My ds sometimes plays with a couple of brothers down our street and they generally always play well together.
My ds is 8 and the two brothers are 7 and 9.
There are a couple of other children in our street a boy and girl of 9 and 10 who are good friends with each other and mostly those two just play together.
However there has been problems in the past whenever my ds has played with these other two with them falling out etc and the threesome has never worked out and has ended with the boy and girl ganging up on my ds blaming him for everything although I am aware that my ds is far from perfect with some of his moods when things are not going his way and he can go into strops.
As I said when my ds plays with the two brothers at the top of the street they generally play well together but problems arise whenever this boy and girl muscle in on all of them.
I have had a terrible day with them all today and it has ended up with the lot of them ganging up on my ds and siding with each other against him.
They were all out today throwing snowballs and the girl who happens to live next door to us went into her garden with two of the boys and they bolted her gate so that my ds and one of the brothers the younger one of 7 could not get in as well.
They then all proceeded to throw snowballs at each other over the fence and they were also throwing sticks and other items I could see that they were not playing nicely and told them so.
My ds and the other lad went out the front and they were then throwing snowballs over the gate at each other as well as this they were throwing snowballs over the fence at my conservatory and kitchen window and I leaned over the fence and told them not to but they continued doing so.
I went back into my house as I could see that it wasn,t doing any good for me to keep asking them not to throw the snowballs and once I went in they stopped doing it.
I then heard somebody crying and it was the the lad that my ds had been with on our side of the fence one of the snowballs had hit him on the cheek and it was red and swollen.
The other three then came out of the garden and the lot of them got into a big argument and I saw the girl give my ds a big shove and my ds and this girl ended up fighting I had to intervene and split them up and the other boy who is good friends with this girl started hurling abuse at my ds and while he was doing this the girl was continually belting my ds with snowballs I asked her to stop as it was making things worse but she totally ignored me the situation was out of control.
I told my ds to come in as by this time they had all turned on him and the 10 year old said that me and my ds are the problem and I told him he had no right to speak to me like that.
My and my ds went in and the girl especially was throwing snowballs at my porch and she came up and flung my porch door open.
I told her to get her dad as I wanted to speak to him about her behaviour. her dad briefly opened the door and shouted what now, and said to his dd you two meaning her and the 10 year old go and play together as whenever you all play there is problems he completely blanked me and then slammed the door shut.
In the fight as well my ds bit the boys arm and brusied it and the girl has a bruise to her leg.
I have so far only spoken to the girls mom and dad about the events of today and it did go well but they did say that my ds does have a bit of a anger problem and it doesn,t take much to wind him up to which I ahd to agree as I am aware my ds has that side to him.
However I feel that there is also a bit of intimidation and bullying going on towards my ds from this boy and girl and they are a couple of ringleaders who seem to manage to turn everyone else against my ds.
The girls mom and dad have made her apologise to me for her behaviour but should I also speak to the boys parents as his attitude was appalling to me and I am aware that he has that bruise on his arm.

crazedupmom Sat 07-Feb-09 22:53:50

I should say that it wasn,t my ds and the other boy who were throwing snowballs at my conservatory and kitchen window it was the other three.
Don,t think I made that very clear.

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