Today dd1 had a friend over to play, they had a lovely time. Before the friend left they did some colouring and sticking together, then the friend left, fine. We went to the library, had a nice time there. Then on to the cornershop. Then, all of a sudden, dd1 bursts into full-on tears - "I wanted to do more playing with my friend after we finished colouring." WTF??? Inconsolable. First I try to calmly talk her out of it, then I got angry and ranted about what a nice day she had etc. and how she was spoiling it. She then stopped, but was still quietly sobbing. She just thinks these things through and then gets upset about how things should/could/might have been... very strange.
sounds just like my DS who will be four next month.
It appears that some things take longer to sink in than others. He is also obsessive about the strangest things i.e. if we take a route home he doesn't like he gets upset. Like your DD he also bursts into tears hours after something happening/not happening.
I think it's about control and realising that they do have a say in how things work.
oh yes. not just later the same day either. dd1 has an incredible memory especially if it's a perceived inustice. she will burst into tears days and even weeks after an unfulfilled promise of some sort "you said you'd let me walk on the wall on the way home that day 3 weeks ago when you were in too much of a hurry to let me walk on the wall on the way there AND YOU DIDN'T". I paraphrase, of course, and it usually takes a full five minutes for me to get out of her (through the blubbering) the enormity of my unjust and mean ways.
oh the best was when DS announced to his father that I was a bad mummy for leaving him in the car while I was in the shops, accompanied by much sobbing. This is blatantly untrue, he was referring to the time I parked next to the cash machine to draw money and rather than get him out on a busy road I thought it best to leave him in his car seat.
Dd burst into tears one night not long after going to bed and said she was worried she was never going tos ee her Nursery Teacher again. The teacher had been off with flu. A week later her teacher announced she was leaving the school and I tought OMG How is dd going to take this. When I explained the sitution very gentley and asked her if she would mind she said "No" and that was the end of that - fickle child!
There's something so cute about these stories - my ds takes offence really easily. If I so much as accidentally touch one of his toys he does the whole lip-quivering thing, and "you hurt Thomas/aeroplane/helicopter", then I say sorry and ask him to forgive me and he gives me a hug. One time he was playing in the garden and it was getting chilly so his grandma put a jumper on him. He cried a bit and then settled down, but then a week later he started saying he was angry because she put a jumper on him and described the whole incident in great detail.
DS (4 on 24/4) has for some unfathomable reason become very attached to an unravelled ball of string (about 8ft long) which he takes everywhere, including down to the high street when we were out shopping--cue huge tears when other shoppers stood on it and another little boy wanted to play with it. So about 10 mins after last hissy-fit, when a toddler staggered towards it in the cafe with a glint in her eye I said (fearing more hysterics) 'Maybe it would be a good idea to put the string away now'. To which he replied, 'replied, 'but she's only a baby mummy, and it's only a ball of string!'
Dd (4 in June) had a friend round. they were playing dolls houses together very nicely, until her friend walked away and sat on the sofa saying she didn't want to play anymore. Dd didn't notice until I asked her friend did she want to go and do some drawing instead. Dd then noticed her friend wasn't playing, burst into floods of tears, and went to bed!