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Parenting

Can I expect a 9 year old to wash herself?

23 replies

breadline · 03/04/2005 20:30

dd is 9 and up til now she has had a bath most nights since she was a baby. Recently she has started to protest but now she is bigger, sweatier and grubbier, I have tried to teach her to wash at the basin with a face cloth in the mornings instead of having a bath every night.
She can't get the hang of this at all. Recently was away at brownie camp and came back completely unwashed after 3 days( they were in a special brownie house with showers and basins) She does do her teeth without being asked , but not sure if i am expecting too much of her or whether I should be coming on stronger. Would like to have enough bath water for myself some nights!

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Lonelymum · 03/04/2005 20:35

Well my 8 (nearly 9) yo boy doesn't even brush his teeth without being told to and even then he doesn't do it properly unless I stand over him. I try not to look at his attempts to wash himself, figuring that even a vague splash with cold water will get the worst of the dirt off.

Don't know what the answer is for your dd, but I do know that coming home from camp completely unwashed is apparently pretty normal.

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kama · 03/04/2005 20:35

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Enid · 03/04/2005 20:36

Its quite cold and depressing washing with a cloth in the morning - much nicer to have a bath. Perhaps she feels a bit put out by not being able to have a bath?

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kama · 03/04/2005 20:37

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shimmy21 · 03/04/2005 20:38

my 8 yr old ds can do it but would never do it without prompting. What about a shower? Could you suggest dd has one in the morning instead of a bath at night? Showers feel more grown up and can be done independently more easily perhaps???

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breadline · 03/04/2005 20:40

she is the one protesting about the bath and is quite happy not to bother.i just think that ahe need a bath or to wash every day. Just wonder if at some point she will want to be clean?

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breadline · 03/04/2005 20:42

don't have a shower.

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kama · 03/04/2005 20:45

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Lonelymum · 03/04/2005 20:46

I don't think a daily bath or all-over body wash is necessary every day at her age, once every other day is enough I would have thought.

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breadline · 03/04/2005 20:49

spose that's true Kama.Do other people bath their 9/10 year olds every night? Must be someone who has taught their kids to use a facecloth surely. Am not being selfish about the bath water btw. there are 5 of us in this house with one bathroom!

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Lonelymum · 03/04/2005 20:52

I quite understand your water situation. Dh and I shower in the mornings, but our 4 children usually bathe at night and they (including the 8 yo) share the bath water - usually run 2 small baths between them and the second of those can be quite cold if I have been washing up just before doing baths.

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noddyholder · 03/04/2005 21:02

my ds is 10 and just about brushes his teeth when nagged!He has 2 baths a week prompted by me and the odd shower When they all have sleepovers they rarely wash at all stinky buggers!

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ChicPea · 03/04/2005 21:02

What about buying Badedas bubble bath so she can be surrounded by bubbles and have some fun?

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breadline · 03/04/2005 21:11

usually use bubbles and put on radio. she is ok when shes in, but i still have to encourage use of soap and actually doing more that just sitting there. Delighted to hear other kids are mingers too!

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bensmum3 · 03/04/2005 23:08

Hi, this thread is very reassuring, I'm constantly nagging dd 10 to wash, bath and clean her teeth. I think she would happily walk around for days if I didnt tell her to do it. She doesnt bath every night , but usually every other,when prompted, once shes in she loves it and I then have to nag to get her out !

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RTMTMML · 03/04/2005 23:48

Try getting a 12 year old boy to have a bath or even a shower, even after coming home filthy from a rugby/football match.!

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sallystrawberry · 03/04/2005 23:52

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sallystrawberry · 03/04/2005 23:53

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stitch · 03/04/2005 23:53

she's past old enough to have a shower herself. and she should be old enough to use the washcloth.
she may need help with shampooing her hair if it is long, but otherwise. shes not a baby anymore. she'll be menstruating soon fgs!

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sallystrawberry · 03/04/2005 23:56

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polly28 · 04/04/2005 00:44

Thankfully vanity has finally kicked in for my 13yr old dd,actually when she was about 12.I used to think it was odd that she didn't mind that her hair was greasy and she looked minging.She now showers atleast every other day because otherwise her hair looks terrible...vanity works wonders.
I would prefer her to shower every day but am thankful she does it every other.I do think she needs teacing about how to wash her hair properly as sometimes i find that it's still greay underneath.Alas I am no longer allowed to see her naked body.

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karen01 · 05/04/2005 09:02

Bradline- DO you wash her sometimes when she is i n the bath. my DD is 8 and for the last 18months she has bathed or showered herself. Baths once twice a week and showeres every other day. SOmetimes though she does like me to give her a good wash down in the bath and we make a game out of it. However trying to get her to have a wash at the sink is not working she can't seem to get to grips with this either. I am terrrible as I would like to shower everymorning and bath every night as I do.

As has already been siad I am sure that when they get older and start top become interested in boys then we won't be able to get them out of the bathroom!!. When she was younger and screamed about getting in the shower or the bath I used to tell her that nobody will want to play with her as she will smell. Harsh but it did the trick.

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HappyDaddy · 05/04/2005 14:13

My friends two dds (5 and 8) have a shower every morning before school and when they get home in the evening. They also brush, wash and do their own hair. They are very aware of the importance of cleanliness. I bath my 10month dd every day.

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