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For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

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For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Parenting

I would never do this....

28 replies

ggglimpopo · 01/04/2005 18:58

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Rowlers · 01/04/2005 19:04

That's not nice. Poor boy. Is he OK about it? I hope it is an oversight and his invitiation arrives next week.

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darlingbud · 01/04/2005 19:04

I would be too poor lad.

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ggglimpopo · 01/04/2005 19:05

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Twiglett · 01/04/2005 19:06

how do you know he's the only one?

do you know the mother well enough to phone her and ask

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Caligula · 01/04/2005 19:07

Ah, poor little boy. It must be an oversight, surely?

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ggglimpopo · 01/04/2005 19:07

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snafu · 01/04/2005 19:08

Oh poor ds. And he thinks he's been invited? God, I hate things like this - I would never do that either. I'd be absolutely livid at the mother, tbh.

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Caligula · 01/04/2005 19:09

Could just be that the invite somehow didn't make it into his bag and she's cursing you for being too rude to let her know if he's coming or not!

Is it too late to find out her number and ask her? You could say that he's insistent he's been invited, and you're embarressed about having to ask her, but he's been nagging you...

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snafu · 01/04/2005 19:09

It must be a mistake, surely? How could someone knowingly leave out one child?

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ScummyMummy · 01/04/2005 19:10

That's a good idea, Caligula. Would you feel ok about doing that, ggg?

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LIZS · 01/04/2005 19:11

Presumably they have been talking about it at school. We have a rule that invitations are not issued through school unless everyone in a class is invited but ds often hears of other parties anyway.

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ggglimpopo · 01/04/2005 19:12

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trefusis · 01/04/2005 19:12

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Caligula · 01/04/2005 19:12

You could also say that you've just heard about it and want to make sure she knows you're not being rude by not responding - make it about your manners, not hers! (Then it won't sound like you're attacking her for not inviting him!)

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collision · 01/04/2005 19:13

I really really doubt that he hasnt been invited. I would ring her and say that you are very embarrassed at having to call but etc etc and that you have other plans but your ds is insistent that he is going to the party and is it OK if he goes. You will feel awful if he should have gone and the invite went missing or something.

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trefusis · 01/04/2005 19:15

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ScummyMummy · 01/04/2005 19:16

Oh good. Fingers crossed that it's all a silly mix up.

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Maddison · 01/04/2005 19:21

What a nasty thing to do (if it has been intentional)

If it was my DS I think I would feel worse for him if I didn't do anything about it so I think Caligula is right

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handlemecarefully · 01/04/2005 19:51

Keep us posted ggglimpopo, I sincerely hope it turns out to be a mistake and he is invited after all

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ggglimpopo · 02/04/2005 09:11

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bakedpotato · 02/04/2005 09:14

grr on your behalf. hope he has a lovely time, and bet the partygiving mum feels very and .
should make her think, at least.

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snafu · 02/04/2005 09:52

for your ds. You don't just leave 'a couple' out, fgs. You invite a select few or the whole lot.

Anywaaaaay - hope your ds has a lovely time and the mother is suitably about the whole thing. Grrrr!

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ScummyMummy · 02/04/2005 09:54

Oh sweetie. It's not your fault or your ds's that this family clearly got the whole invite thing wrong wrong wrong, is it? It is a minefield all this stuff but I think the vast majority of people would either invite everyone in a class or a sufficiently small number to be very clear that for size/expense reasons not all children can be accomodated. If they've invited almost everyone then they've mucked up a bit, frankly. Easily done, but repercussions are inevitable- it's just a shame that it's your wee lad who's been caught by their bad planning. Thank goodness the mother has seen sense and invited him now. I would just shove the thought of their initial mismanagement of the event to the back of your mind and send ds along to have a lovely time. I'm sure he'll be an asset to the proceedings.

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ambrosia · 02/04/2005 10:50

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lljkk · 02/04/2005 13:05

This has happened to my DS a lot, too, gglimpopo. My neighbour keeps asking "Is your DS going to the party this weekend?" She is trying to offer to take DS for me (along with her own boy), but there's no point, DS doesn't get invited! I find it very upsetting, not least because DS seems (to me) well-enough liked by his classmates. But if you aren't on very chummy friends with the mums, they don't invite your kids...

I am going to throw an entire year-group party for DS when he turns 6. May as well, may be the only party he goes to all year. Can you plan a special day out for your DS?