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I know I am going to get told off for not being grateful for having a healthy lively child but my dd is still driving me mad why can;t she sit still, watch tv without dancing or walk without twirling or skipping.

(41 Posts)
twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 11:43:37

I have posted about this before but need to offload or I will shout at her, she is 7.

She just cannot sit still, she has just been talking to me whilst jumping on and off the back of the sofa which resulted in her smashing some photo frames.

She can't sit down of an evening she spends the whole night making up dance routines which is cute but dp and I have hours of her jumping about and shouting step 2, 3, 4, stretch 2,3 4.

At night when we send her to bed she is either singing, dancing or designing something which she does until she falls asleep. I have been upstairs countless time to find her asleep on the floor where she has fallen mid dance.

When we walk into town she is forever twirling, jumping practising dance steps which again is cute but in the town where we live the paths are narrow and I am always having to apologise as she bangs into people.

I don't know what I hope to acheive from this thread, this will be the third time I have started a thread like this and I always get heckled and told I am ungrateful cow who doesn;t appreciate such a special child.

We do try to encourage her in her interests she loives designing clothes so I take her to shops with a camera and we photograph clothes for inspiration, we makes things togther collect idea from magazines. I have taken her to fashions shows and dp and I spend hours drawing with her. She loves to paint so we take her walking to get rid of some of that energy and will have a stop to paint the view which she loves. She goes horseriding, swimming a few times a week and is about to start dance classes again. She walks with the dog or comes out on her bike with us most days for at least an hour and at weekends much longer.

I just don;t know what to do to keep up with my dd. Does anyone else have a child like this? how do they cope?

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 11:46:12

She also wants to do some acting, she used to be ina drama group and would love to join a stagecoach type group and hopefully we can allow her to do that soon but all these activities add up and we are at the moment paying rent and mortgage.

FlexThyDivineMind Sun 02-Nov-08 11:47:53

was it Posie Fossil in the Ballet Shoes books whose feet were always tapping?

I do empathise. My ds1 is like this, but without the cuteness or talent. He just twiddles and fiddles and is always getting in peoples' way when we are walking in the street. He gets told off constantly by other adults as he cannot pass a wall, a railing or a step without climbing or swinging on it. It was cute when he was 5. But now he is a tall almost 11 year old.....

LIZS Sun 02-Nov-08 11:50:38

dd can be similar . She couldn't sit still last night watching tv or reading, was doing headstands on the sofa or dancing, and I know other girls similar.

It sounds as if you need to be more firm about bedtime, perhaps have a fixed routine to wind her down. She may be overstimulated by doing activities so late which won't help her settle, then get overtired and excitable next day.

Maybe food/drink is a contributory factor (keep a diary for a few weeks) and also having to be still for such lenghty periods during the schoolday she may simply need a physical outlet later on.

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 11:51:13

last time posted something like this someone posted me a link to an article about a ballerina who was just like my dd so I have tried to be more tolerant and accept she is not being naughty she is just wired this way. I am amused at the thought of her doing the same at age 11.

FrightKnot Sun 02-Nov-08 11:52:07

Is she good at dancing? What about stage school? grin

She does sounds like she has lots of energy which is brilliant but I can see why you are exhausted too.

Does she spend much time with friends outside of school...I guess more fun for her to be making up dance routines with a friend and not so intense for you?

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 11:52:49

I have tried being more form about bedtime, so wind down starts at about half five- six as that is when I get home. We do TV off, bath and bed with story and she seems calm but then we hear her starting again.

PsychoGuyFawkesMum Sun 02-Nov-08 11:54:03

I have one of those children......in fact two, but the eldest is now 14 and so not quite so tryingwink.

my DS2 tho.......he has to make noise all the time<<sigh>>.

he is in 'playground' mode almost all the time, loud, energetic, bouncy.....(until it comes time to do homework that ishmm....he then turns into mr floppy and silent!).

I think tho that the one thing in my favour is that he has older siblings to go and annoy entertain. I find him extraordinarily hard work when I have him on his own.

a good few of my friends have questioned ADHD with him............he may have ADD (his attention span is that of a goldfish!), but otherwise, he is just simply a very lively active boy who likes to make his prescence felt in a very obvious way.

my coping stratigies(sp?).........wine, sense of humour, wine, seeing lots of friends, wine, shouting blush, and more wine.

<<not that I have a drinking problem or anythingwink>>

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 11:55:49

Where we used to live she had friends on the road so she was out all day and it was not as noticeable. We moved recently and there are no children on our road although I have got a sleepover planned which is being reciprocated. Another mum has also offered to take her dancing for us.

I would like to send her to something like stagecoach but it all comes down to money and time, she already does
horseriding, about to start dancing and goes to a club at the museum as well as regular trampolinging and swimming she also wants to join the gymnastics club,

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 11:57:41

Psycho you are right it is hard when it is just you and the child, it becomes very intense.

She loves her homework and often does extra projects at home and loves to be given a page of sums or to write stories.

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 11:58:51

FrightknotI know she is mine and I am biased but she is a fantastic dancer, she has been in quite a few shows and tends to stand out.

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 11:59:35

She is also very clever as well as being dramatic and arty so I want to get the balance as well.

luckylady74 Sun 02-Nov-08 12:01:21

I absolutely sympathise- sounds exhausting.
My ds1 has aspergers and has no interest in tv - fair enough, but sometimes when he's been 'relaxing' by standing on his head/jumping off tables/breaking all the slats under my bed - I'd just like him to sit still and watch something. Drawing/ looking at books all needs supervision.

His indoor trampoline is good, but I've not got much advise only sympathy.

I try bribery if I'm desperate - eg challenge to do something and sweets as reward.

luckylady74 Sun 02-Nov-08 12:05:27

Could you get ahead of yourself (not easy with job and so on I know) and just make/ buy tons of resources for her to use at weekends?Could she do an extended project such as writing a play?
Could you exhaust her more - eg she could run whilst you are on a bike!
Could you take her to yogabugs or similar so she learns to relax?

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 12:09:23

Lucky lady she would probably love to write a play. I try to get ahead so just before this half term I planned a party for her and got lots of things in to make decorations. I also bought her some new watercolours and oils with some papers and canvasses so she could do that. Over the summer I booked her into lots pf workshops and activities so she had something special to do every week. But it is hard work keeping up with her and a demanding job.

At the moment she is designing her latest collection of clothes {grin] so I have bought her lots of magazines and we have chosen some fabrics to display her designs.

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 12:10:00

I might look for a kids yoga group for her.

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 12:11:16

It amazes me how much effort and time she takes, I bet that sounds really stupid and selfish. I cannot remember my own parents doing anything for me but dp and I spend hours everyday entertaining dd.

FlexThyDivineMind Sun 02-Nov-08 12:12:17

my son is hyper active (not hyperactive though IYSWIM)
He doesn't need that much sleep, and it is not unusual for him to go swimming in the morning and a long bike ride in the afternoon and still be bouncing full of energy. It is exhausting for us as parents and his younger brother is way more of a coach potato so we are constantly struggling to fulfill both needs.

I have devised a osrt of relaxation wind/down routine before bedtime involving warm bath followed by simple breathing (yoga) and relaxation techniques set to gentle music whiuch does seem to help sometimes. And if you tell your budding dancer how important it is for her to learn to relax too, for the sake of her body, shemight be keen to try?

PsychoGuyFawkesMum Sun 02-Nov-08 12:12:58

I do think dancing is the way to go then......harness those talentsgrin.

my eldest 'full-on-intense-loud-child' is very talented at dance and drama, and is heading that way in terms of career too. she also puts on shows (still!), and this is where her being the eldest of five comes into her favour.....she has a ready cast to boss encouragegrin.

we also have a large lounge.........which I need as they all seem to spend much of their time tumbling and handstanding and headstanding. in fact, between all of mine they never go the enitre day uprighthmm.

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 12:13:27

I will try that Flex.

FlexThyDivineMind Sun 02-Nov-08 12:14:58

(it's FMV with my anagram name)
we have decided to have a quiet day today as we are all snuffly and it is vile outside. Ds1 is literally prowling round the house like a caged animal. Sigh.

FlexThyDivineMind Sun 02-Nov-08 12:16:12

do you know the old ''lie down and tense every muscle in your body in turn then relax it'' routine?
tis very good for stressed out adults too

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 12:16:25

dd is prowling, she is going to stay with her stepmum in london for a few days. She has never had dd on her own for more than a day O am quite worried about it tbh as her stepmum has a toddler to look after as well.

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 12:17:09

Flex I do know that I use it at school with my students.

twinsetandpearls Sun 02-Nov-08 12:17:59

She has always been very active as a baby I used to give her a massage every night and did that until she was about 2, maybe she needs something similar.

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