Talk

Advanced search

One magic piece of advice...

(35 Posts)
Stilltrue Tue 08-Mar-05 13:32:36

If you had to choose ONE piece of advice to give to a friend/sister about to have a first child, what would it be ?

I would say: be calm and confident in your parenting choices whatever they are, and however hard your situation is at a particular time.
Long term your child will reap the benefit of having a background of confident parenting.

Any other ideas?

flamesparrow Tue 08-Mar-05 13:35:56

Read all the advice in sight, then forget it all and follow your heart.

desperatehousewife Tue 08-Mar-05 13:43:44

buy Gina Ford for sleep and eating, Penelope Leach for emotional development, and Miriam stoppard for illness. That covers it all!

Twiglett Tue 08-Mar-05 13:53:21

ignore Gina Ford and go with your gut instinct and your baby

handlemecarefully Tue 08-Mar-05 13:54:54

Tell yourself that as long as you are doing your best then you are doing just fine.

nailpolish Tue 08-Mar-05 14:00:04

dont fret about sleeping, eating or anything else. cuddle baby as much as possible, they dont stay small for long

oh and let baby sleep in your bed when they are tiny, it does no harm (imo) and you get lots of cuddles, baby feels safe and protected

dont wish away, ie 'i wish he/she could walk/talk/feed/etc' as time passes too quickly as it is

flamesparrow Tue 08-Mar-05 14:02:33

Yes! Cuddle your baby as much as you possibly can - it doesn't "spoil" them, and too soon they will be shoving you away so they can run and play!

kama Tue 08-Mar-05 14:03:52

Message withdrawn

Branster Tue 08-Mar-05 14:05:25

sleep at absolutely any opportunity you get whilst the baby is small and sod the housework for a few months.
pick the baby up all the time.

jampots Tue 08-Mar-05 14:06:24

enjoy every day - they arent small for long.

and definitely go with gut instinct, followed by a little bit of advice to back your instinct up

lucykatie Tue 08-Mar-05 14:06:50

throw all books on babys in the bin.....not all babys are the same so how can a book tell you what to do.

and yes again.....enjoy them while you can, they grow up sooooooooooo fast.

NomDePlume Tue 08-Mar-05 14:07:08

Get a broadband connection and add mumsnet to your favourites !

suzywong Tue 08-Mar-05 14:07:26

keep her with you for as long as it's beneficial to both parties, but if your sleep is getting disturbed to the point of leaving you no good for the next day then don't hesitate to ship her out to the cot. ( I co slept with ds1 till he was 14 months and he was just trying it on by that time)

and lots of lots of cuddles, never miss an opportunity to cuddle and stroke and tell them that you love them and you make them happy.

And good point about be confident

psychomum5 Tue 08-Mar-05 14:08:01

they don't come with a handbook....(such a shame!!), so follow your instincts, and if you are still unsure, ask your mum/closest friend/sister.

and cuddle them lots, they don't stay small forever, and you will soon miss it when they grow.

flamesparrow Tue 08-Mar-05 14:08:08

Babies in bed is lovely - B went into her own cot at about 6 weeks, but still came in and out as the situation required (and yes, sometimes that was just mummy requiring her baby for cuddles!).

She is now 21 months, and comes in if she is poorly (I feel I can keep a better eye on her with us).

When they are old enough to kick up a fuss, its been a case for us of being strong, saying no, and letting her cry for a little bit. She soon twigs it ain't happening and goes back to sleep alone!

nailpolish Tue 08-Mar-05 14:09:54

hi kama

i let dd's sleep in our bed til they were hardly needing fed through the night, about 14 wks. bf is so nice lying down, in bed, i couldnt resist. and i used to fall asleep, and wake up, boob hanging out, baby asleep! i honestly think its fine, but not too long, about maybe 5 mths. please note i am not an expert, this just worked for me

when i started putting them in bed on their own, i put beside them my nightie so they could still smell me. and i put them in their own room too

co-sleeping is lovely, sadly my dd's are not doing it any more

skerriesmum Tue 08-Mar-05 14:10:29

Cuddle and hug lots, give them massage, basically lots of body contact. My ds now 2 is very affectionate because he got this start (and I still love to cuddle him!) Now when he's being changed into clothes in the mornings he says "cuggle!" And we have a long hug when he's still just in his nappy. I love him to bits!

Sorrel Tue 08-Mar-05 14:11:56

bump

Cooperoo Tue 08-Mar-05 14:12:26

Buy a thermos mug or learn to enjoy luke warm tea and coffee.
Enjoy it while you can, these are precious times and as someone else said you cannot spoil a small baby.

PinkWebby Tue 08-Mar-05 14:13:28

My advise would be is enjoy them as much as you can, It is hard to make the time to play, but they will enjoy seeing you having fun with them. It will make them happy which is what we all want for our babies.

prunegirl Tue 08-Mar-05 14:13:35

Message withdrawn

suzywong Tue 08-Mar-05 14:16:52

Kama, keep her with you for as long as it's beneficial to both parties, but if your sleep is getting disturbed to the point of leaving you no good for the next day then don't hesitate to ship her out to the cot. ( I co slept with ds1 till he was 14 months and he was just trying it on by that time)

and lots of lots of cuddles, never miss an opportunity to cuddle and stroke and tell them that you love them and you make them happy.

And good point about be confident

kama Tue 08-Mar-05 14:18:19

Message withdrawn

nailpolish Tue 08-Mar-05 14:19:41

does she have her daytime naps in her own bed? my dd's did and it got them used to it. i hope everything works out ok for you. i bottle fed from 6 mths also

WestCountryLass Tue 08-Mar-05 14:42:44

Forget cosleeping for babies benefit, I enjoy cosleeping as mine are like extra cuddly hot water bottles on chilly nights

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now