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Please tell me how I should ahve handled this and what to do

(14 Posts)
SharpMolarBear Sun 19-Oct-08 19:48:23

DS (18mo) eats almost nothing. Today he has maybe had 100 non-bm calories, from some cereal he had this morning, and some he's having now.
Tonight he sat down for tea, speared a carrot, threw it on the floor and then asked to get down. He spent the next 20 mins screaming for a feed, he'd spent the whole afternoon sacreamnig for smething, not sure why.
He eats very little and incredibly limited, and just wants breastfeedng all the tme. Today I am at the end of my tether. I would mind the frequent bfs if he just ate.

RubySlippers Sun 19-Oct-08 19:49:18

is he teething?

My DS is 2.5 and getting a back molar and he is off his food and just wants milk

frustarting but i think fairly usual

notnowbernard Sun 19-Oct-08 19:56:53

Is he always like this or is it a recent thing?

S1ur Sun 19-Oct-08 20:00:14

yes, good question. Is he like this all the time?

My dc have been like this when a bit poorly (even sometimes when they after appeared that unwell).

and yes teething might be an option, but also if he is just feeling a bit needy.

How long you go with it depends on how long its been going on and on much it worries you....

notnowbernard Sun 19-Oct-08 20:05:03

I am thinking on the cusp of illness if recent

If long-term shall bow out as am unqualified in toddler food/mealtime shenanigans smile

SharpMolarBear Sun 19-Oct-08 21:05:04

He's always been like this. At the moment he is slightly worse than normal as he is teething (yes, molars, thought my Halloween name very appropriate this year) but this 'moment' has been about 3 months, one thing after another D&V, conjunctivitis, cold, conjunctivitis again, eye infection last week and teething throughout. (He's on ABs at the moment). Even when he's fully well, all three days of it, he's never a good eater.
That and the constant howling just sent me a bit over the edge, sorry. He';s sleeping peacefully now so am a bit calmer.
Not sure whether to cut down on bf (he can be distracted up to apoint, then he gets obsessive), stop altogeter or ... I don't know. He's not talking much, and although he understands loads like "get the ball and take it to daddy" "go and get your shoes and we'll put them on" i don't think he's at the stage where he'll understand me telling him e can have a feed later, or that it's all gone.

katyamum Sun 19-Oct-08 21:40:51

Hello. Sorry you are having a hard night. I have 3 children 6,4, and 2. I breast fed each to 1 year. You know already that when they are ill they regress, and it sounds like he's taken a real hit of bugs. So perhaps don't try to change anything at all until he's better. Which eventually he will be.

Then you need to decide whether you want to start reducing feeds. For a child of his age, he should get most of his calories from solids. The feeding is less about nutrition at this stage (although I am happy to be corrected if I am wrong). It's great to still breast feed. I think you just need advice about how to get him interested in eating. But I think kids do go in phases of being willing to try new thigs and not willing etc, and I always think it helps if you lead by example ie. sit downa t the table together and have a meal, something simple, pasta etc. Or make fun food like picnics etc. When he's older you can do bakign etc. Do you have a good health visitor? A good one should be really helpful at this stuff.

Don't worry about the not talking. My 2 yr old hardly spoke until just before his 2nd birthdya then it suddenly took off. Now he won't shut up! Weaning from breast is very hard to describe in words anyway. I think it comes from within, and when he's ready he'll show less interest. It's very hard to make them give up if they don't feel ready.

Hope you get some sleep at least. x

SharpMolarBear Sun 19-Oct-08 21:46:39

I'm not particularly worried about the talking as such, just that everything I';ve read about cutting down on feeds seems to talk about distraction or telling them that it's all gone, or filled later iyswim, I don't think he's at a stage where that will work.
I do agree that he should by now be getting a fair amunt of calories from solid food. Suppose I just need to go back to basics and kind of start again I think he eats better at nursery, so I suppose that agrees with the fact that it's bf that's causing him to be like this.
He's small, but recently he seems to have lost weight as his nappies do up further than they used to, also hasn't needed new shoes for about 3 months. Pathetic I know, sob!
HV is good ut I am worried she will just tell me to stop bf, or even if she doesn't, what is she likely to suggest?

thisisyesterday Sun 19-Oct-08 21:51:37

sharpmolarbear, no great advice for you atm, but would highly recommend getting the book "my child won't eat" by carlos gonzalez
it's an LLL book and a really good book full of fabby advice.
well worth it

it's here on amazon

thisisyesterday Sun 19-Oct-08 21:52:36

obv cos the book is an LLL one it's very bf-friendly too hence the suggestion

SharpMolarBear Sun 19-Oct-08 21:54:34

ooh never even heard of that, thank you.
Ironically, he may eat the book
(hopefully it is full of cream)

SharpMolarBear Sun 19-Oct-08 21:55:17

Yeah, turns nose up at my cooking, but when helping plant flowers was quite happy to nibble at the compost blush

katyamum Sun 19-Oct-08 22:05:51

It sounds like you don't want to give up breast feeding, because it's not guaranteed that by giving up he would eat better. It's not so simple as just starting all over again, because he's older. What you can get away with in a 6 month old is much harder when they are older. But by the same token, they can communicate that much better with you. Maybe he had a growth spurt and rather than lost weight, maybe he just thinned out a bit? But if he's been ill, then it would make sense that he's lost weight. If you are worried, go back to the HV nd ask them to plot his weight. But they all fluctuate, and I don't read to much into the centile charts etc. I doubt the HV would tell you to give up bf. She might just have some strategies that you can apply. Or she might be able to refer you to someone who can give you strategies.

That book sounds great. I would just get through this period on antibiotics, and then keep a little food diary. You'd be amazed, once you add up all the in between snacks etc how much a toddler does eat. Maybe it's more than you realise?

Good luck.

SharpMolarBear Mon 20-Oct-08 17:41:05

thanks. will keep a (very) little food diary

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