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so tell me please

(23 Posts)
hallo Thu 09-Oct-08 08:03:22

I have been lurking and reading for quite a while but have finally decided to post in the hope that everyone else is as slack me.
I ran into a mum I haven't seen for ages and she has had another baby since I last saw her and I have one on the way anyway it transpires she is some sort of supermum so please tell me how often you do the following with your children so I know if mine are deprived or not
water play
activity books
pretend games
I do, do this stuff but man she made me feel bad as often I plonk and potter where as she will play for ages with her dc at these things

S1ur Thu 09-Oct-08 08:08:44

I do at least two of those things daily I think.

I am generally quite a slacker.

I have a mate who sets up a 'mark-making' area, a imaginative play area and a construction table the night before. And then if that wasn't barmy dedicated enough she then actually plays with her children too. Some people are just better than us ok?

Overmydeadbody Thu 09-Oct-08 08:12:14

You mean some people actually play with their children, rather than being sensible plonking and pottering?!shock

SmugColditz Thu 09-Oct-08 08:13:31

Walks - several times a day
Stories - daily
Art/craft - does scribbling on receipts count?
Water play - yes.... in the bath.
Pretend play - well ds1 would never engage with this, but ds2 quite likes it, and although we don't have playdough because i hate it and I am in charge, we do have plasticene, and we make baby crabby crabs and bigbig snakes and more lotta lotta balls.
huts - on my sofa hmm i do not encourage this.
playground - if I can be bothered.

I am slack, but he goes to playscvhool 1 day a week and I do think if they don't learn how to amuse themselves they get incredibly difficult and expensive to deal with as they get older.

hallo Thu 09-Oct-08 08:13:40

I know slur but prior to this I had her on my "At least xxx is as slack as me" list and now I know I was deluded. I admit I do stories religiously every day sometimes several times a day and walks/playground almost every day but else it is plonk and potter ie I get stuff out for em but leave em to it. Your mate puts me to shame...I have good intentions but then I get all cosy and dh puts a glass in my hand and I forget all my "Oh will set up train set all complete while they are asleep, all around sofa " ideas and put it on tomorrows list

SmugColditz Thu 09-Oct-08 08:14:21

Slur, your mate is a nutter whose child is going to grow up thinking the whole world is arranged for his convenience.

finknottle Thu 09-Oct-08 08:15:24

Also in the 'plonk and potter' camp. Mine all a bit older now, mind, seem to have thrived on benign neglect.
Don't believe always having an educational/playtime/entertainment programme <shudder> is necessary.

SmugColditz Thu 09-Oct-08 08:15:50

Don't set the train set up, get the box out and make THEM set it up.

My kids rarely PLAY with their trainset, they spend all day building it.

Children do not need an itinerary, i think it's insulting to them to treat them like they can't be trusted for a second1

hallo Thu 09-Oct-08 08:17:14

Over ah just what I need to hear
and Colditz put like that I do a bit...bath, etc well not pretend can't stand it and happily PROVIDE the playdough and dutifully eat my pink and green platters of what they create but don't usually make stuff with them. Huts I cheat as they have a playtent and I stick em in that if they start on about a hut.

(oh I feel like I know you all as I have been lurking so long)

Buda Thu 09-Oct-08 08:17:42

Play with children? What is this play? I buy the toys - he plays! grin

Actually when he was little I did do some stuff but not anywhere near as much as I should.

I have an only one and am a strong believer that he needs to learn to amuse himself.

JacobsPrincessOfDarkness Thu 09-Oct-08 08:17:42

Agree with Smug. DS1 is bossy and I won't play with him because he's unfair!! He lives in his own imaginary world. At the moment, I'm "bad" and am covered in bits of paper "with kisses on, because you are bad" (he means crosses!)

hallo Thu 09-Oct-08 08:42:32

I knew mumsnetters --spent too much time on here-- would be based in reality, feeling much better now. I kind of had my kids in the wrong order and none of them play together so I have a couple different plonk stations and kind of patrol rather than potter

hallo Thu 09-Oct-08 08:44:09

hmm should be --spent too much time on here to play for long periods--

hallo Thu 09-Oct-08 08:44:35

ohh bloody crossouts

S1ur Thu 09-Oct-08 09:00:02

'plonk patrol potter' sounds life a fine parenting slogan to me.

<pssst put your --'s around each word, like -- this -- but without the spaces so you can do multiple strikeouts>

chapeloffearstickchick Thu 09-Oct-08 09:00:39

playdough, i used to do this a lot in fact s i now h.e we still do it frequently we are currently making a nativity scene....

art/craft,most days when they were smaller a pritt stick and an argos catalogue whiles away hours lol

water play aside from an outside paddling pool only used in extreme sun i have been known to put them in a lukewarm bath to play mid day with loads of empty bottles - fave game being 'pub'hmm

activity books most days certainly bedtimes

pretend games do u mean playmobil and stuff?? and dressing up etc? if so most weeks.

huts-my wooden washing maiden was wrecked by the time ds1 was schoolie therefore i now use tents and ours has just come in fter wet summer in the garden.

stories-every day even now

sandpit-weve always had a sandpit and its frequently used ....if only for when ds2 hides ds1 shoes hmm

walks-every day we have dog and fresh air = sleep lol

playground-when they were smaller we used to drive out to nice ones nowadays probably just weekends

I think you probably do a lot more than you think you do ds1 whose 15shock now still calls me upstairs to play on the ps2 with him.

MrsMattie Thu 09-Oct-08 09:05:09

Playdough - hardly ever. He does this loads at nursery

Art/craft - I get the pencils and paper out for him to draw pictures a few times a wek. Again, he does loads of this at nursery.

Water play / Sandpit- I let him play with water in the garden in the summer. Otherwise, nope. Again - does it at nursery.

Pretend games - I am crap at playing imahginative games with him. I try, but always get bored.

Huts - nah. he has a wendy house at nursery and at his granny's that he plays with a few times a week.

Stories - this is the one thing I do with him everyday. We have stories every nigth beforebed and often one in the monring over breakfast or late afternoon, when he needs to unwind. He loves stories. We also go to the library at least once a week.

Walks / playground - most days. Our pattern during the week is morning: nursery, afternoon: something active.

hallo Thu 09-Oct-08 09:14:40

thanks slur was getting pissy with it!!!
chapel and mrsmattie do you stay and do these things actively with your dc or do you put it out and supervise/get on with other stuff cruise the various locations of your children to make sure they are not (as ds1 likes to do) measuring the bathroom floor with rolls of toilet paper (for those interested it takes almost 1/2 entire roll to cover said bathroom floor.

hallo Thu 09-Oct-08 09:17:10

also how old are your children, do you think this is relevant. Said super friend has dd 8, ds 5 and ds 7mths. I have dd 8, ds 5, dd 2.5 and ds 1.5 plus 4mths to bump becomes logistic nightmare for bedroom and car space.

MrsMattie Thu 09-Oct-08 09:21:45


My son is 3.7 yrs old. I mostly lay stuff out, set him up / give him ideas and then supervise. Sometimes I get involved. He is just at the age now where he enjoys being left to his own devices a bit more.

To be honest, I wouldn't stress about these things.
You sound like you have a lot on your plate - you can't really be expected to devote hours and hours to getting stuck into arts and crafts, for example, with 4 kids and 5th on the way!
I think that all too soon kids have lots of structured activities at nursery/school, so the casual, unstructured 'pottering' that goes on art home with mum is probably really beneficial and relaxing for them.

MrsMattie Thu 09-Oct-08 09:22:18

goes on at home, not art!

chapeloffearstickchick Thu 09-Oct-08 09:48:45 ds are older now 15,13 (today) and just 8 but i home ed the 8 yr old and do a lot of supervised structured crft when they were smaller i did used to sit for hours playing with them with dough and colouring in etc etc but they grew up and i...........discovered mumsnet wink

Acinonyx Thu 09-Oct-08 10:13:23

There are some things I like doing and some I really don't and avoid. I especially like the activities you do sitting in one place. dd is 3.

playdough - HATE this stuff. Dh is on permanent playdough duty.
art/craft - quite like a bit of sticking and we do tons of drawing and colouring
water play - hmmm, can't remember the last time...
activity books - now and then
pretend games - every day, not always gladly though...
huts - occaisionally put the tablecloth over a couple of chairs
stories - lots and lots - my favourite activity and I get to sit in a comfy chair!
sandpit - never
walks - not as much as I should but CM and dh do a ton of walking with her
playground - I really don't like the playground. Occaisionally I go out of guilt.

It would never occur to me to set stuff up the night before. I play with dd a lot but that's because I have failed hopelessly in my desperate attempts to get her to play on her own.

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