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how do you split money between yourself and DH?

(79 Posts)
deb21 Tue 12-Aug-08 21:50:57

OK - thought I would post here as I don't know if its a bit personal to ask friends.

Before by DD was born, DH and I split everything (mortgage, bill, groceries) 50:50.

My paid part of maternity leave has just run out and I'm on SMP (440 quid per month).

I'm interested to know how much of this do other people keep for their day to day spends and how much goes into the household pot.

I'm just trying to discuss it with DH and he is hiding behind his laptop saying hmmm. I have suggested I keep 30 quid a week to cover my spends and put the rest in the mortgage pot - have no idea if I am being greedy or overly generous!

Would be interested to hear what other people do.

expatinscotland Tue 12-Aug-08 21:52:26

We don't. Everything we have is joint. When I worked FT, it all went into one pot. Now he works FT, it all goes into one pot.

We're partners, not housemates.

expatinscotland Tue 12-Aug-08 21:53:02

That goes for what we earn - from whatever source we earn it.

BaDaBing Tue 12-Aug-08 21:54:09

I am same as you expat and alway has been. Can't imagine having to ask for money or be asked.

Hadassah Tue 12-Aug-08 21:54:53

We don't split. Everything is paid into a joint account and comes out of a joint account. How can you arrive at an equitable arrangement if one person is earning and another is on SMP?

expatinscotland Tue 12-Aug-08 21:55:04

They didn't ask. It was given to them and they took it and they needed it and put it to good use.

expatinscotland Tue 12-Aug-08 21:55:34

Sorry, wrong thread! blush

AccidentalMum Tue 12-Aug-08 21:55:37

Overly generous I think. I have about £500 a month for all the kids and my clothes and entertainment, any non vegan food stuffs (another thread!), anything the house 'needs', trips to my parents on the train, some other stuff I'm sure, and we are on a lower than average income as a household.

Hecate Tue 12-Aug-08 21:55:41

We don't. Everything into the pot, everything out of the pot as needed.

What's mine is yours and all that...

Tinkjon Tue 12-Aug-08 21:56:11

I earn nothing so I shove everything on the credit card and DH pays the bill

TheFifthApe Tue 12-Aug-08 21:57:10

dh works f/t
I work p/t
one account

nice and simple!

and if I didn't work it would still be one pot

can you do a spreadsheet with bills etc on and work out what if left at the end of the month? then agree an amount for 'fun' money and then you can buy stuff without 'asking permission' which would frankly make me vomit

same goes for your dh, he has his 'fun' money so can buy whatever crap he wants as well

Denny185 Tue 12-Aug-08 21:57:51

We have a joint account, he earns it I spend it smile

phdlife Tue 12-Aug-08 21:58:42

Everything goes into one pot (I'm not earning). All the bills come out and we each get £30 a week "pocket money" to do things like newspapers, milk, ice-creams, toys (for dh), birthday cards for family, coffee with friend, midweek veggie fix, etc.

Theresa Tue 12-Aug-08 22:00:11

dh has always earned loads more than me. Before children we each put the same percentage of our wages into joint account and the rest was ours to do with as we wanted whihc i thought was totally fair. He's always spent more than me and thats fine! Now i work part time, both wages go into joint account, i spend what i want (i do not have expensive tastes and spend a fair bit of time one step up from looking like a tramp!). He takes out his 'pocket money' a set amount each month and spends on what he wants. If we have a family trip or meal out, he frequently pays out of his money rahter than out of the joint account. Money is something we rarely if ever argue about!

Heated Tue 12-Aug-08 22:01:53

Same here - one pot. The difference is, that when I worked full-time I put away savings in my name, since dh isn's so disciplined and would just want to spend it, & dh checks in with me if he's buying anything that's non-essential since he's got no idea how much money we've got smile.

babyinarms Tue 12-Aug-08 22:02:44

We have always had a joint account...since we got engaged....and married...and every thing goes into it and we take what we need, once the bills are paid and there is little in the savings we dont ask what the other spends on what...just as well really cos i'm the big spender...just cant help myself....DH seems to manage on pittens really!

eidsvold Tue 12-Aug-08 22:08:29

we have always had joint accounts. When I worked full time, when I was on maternity leave and now I am a sahm. We pay the bills, save and then we would each have a set amount a week for 'pocket money' if we need more than that well it is there.

Uriel Tue 12-Aug-08 22:09:51

Joint account. Equal access.

CarGirl Tue 12-Aug-08 22:10:58

it's all "our" money it's "our" house, they "our" children we are both careful/responsible with money and trust each other and discuss big expenditures (probably talking over £80 - we have quite a low income tbh)

anniemac Tue 12-Aug-08 22:38:09

Message withdrawn

QueenEagle Tue 12-Aug-08 22:39:18

Joint account for all bills/groceries. Equal amount paid into it by each.

Our own accounts to do whatever we want with what's left after paying into the bills a/c.

dh moans about this as I earn about 3k more than him and he thinks we should pay proportionate amounts according to our earnings into it. I disagree as when I was earning 3k less than him it was still 50-50.

My opinion is that ideally you should have an agreement that you are both happy with.

olympicsnotfederer Tue 12-Aug-08 22:40:55

one pot for everything

he earns twice what I earn

I spend twice what he spends smile

MegBusset Tue 12-Aug-08 22:42:11

Joint account for mortgage, bills, groceries, etc.

Separate current accounts which each get the same small amount of personal shopping money a month.

Any excess goes into joint savings.

We have done this since we moved in together more or less, through times when both our incomes have gone up and down. Seems the only fair way to do it.

unknownrebelbang Tue 12-Aug-08 22:44:28

What's his is mine, what's mine's my own.
wink

Seriously though, although we have separate accounts (because we're paid differently) we use them pretty much as a joint account.

JamieJay Tue 12-Aug-08 22:51:08

Both salaries paid into joint account. I earn over twice as much as DH but we split everything down the middle - I would expect this equal split even if I gave up work to be SAHM at any point.

Mortgage and all direct debits paid.

Set amounts paid into our individual savings accounts and the joint (long term) savings account.

Money put aside to cover our hobbies so we have equal chance to pursue our own thing.

Set amount for each week to cover
* food
* petrol for each car
* a joint night out/in (just rent DVD if money tight)
* equal 'pocket money' to cover our incidentals.

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