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Depression / anxiety - advice needed on anti-depressants

(10 Posts)
BBJ Sat 09-Aug-08 20:15:23

I'm hardly ever on here and this is my second (unrelated!) post in 20 mins....!
Anyway, I'm having a really hard time of it at the moment (like many of us on here I have 3 small kids and very little / no extended family support. Husband is great now but have an 'emotional affair' last yr - long story...). I love my kids but feel utterly drained by them. Recently things have got really bad. I don't smack them or anything but I am a really grumpy and shouty mum and have zero (and I mean) zero time, tolerance or patience with / for them. I feel desperately bored as a SAHM (am currently job-seeking) and have some days when I can't even motivate myself to go out. My sex drive (mediocre at the best of times) has become non-existant and I'm suffering really bad PMS these days. I'm impatient and just very unhappy - and I can't help but feel that a lot of this is to do with hormones. I also feel really really stressed a lot of the time (I mean I can actually physically shake with stress)- unable to sleep etc - and I worry about everything. We also are experiencing probs w/ neighbours. My poor kids, I feel they deserve so much better. So I need to take action and I need advice: I know everyone's different and different medicines affect different people but I am soooooo scared of the thought of being reliant upon ADs - what is your experience? Do you have to be on them forever? Do they only work for the time you are taking them? And which brand / type seems to work best??? I sound like a right head-case I know. Stupid thing is, you'd never guess it if you met me on the street (I have that Happy Housewife persona down to a T !) Thanks in advance.

lucylue Sat 09-Aug-08 20:20:45

sorry for your situation, its hard i know.
i found citalopram good for myself.

pinkdiamonds4me Sat 09-Aug-08 21:31:14

hi i felt like you a year ago and went to see my doctor. she wanted me to take AD but i said no. then just before xmas i decided to take them, she prescribed citolopram 20mg, well after a month i felt sooo much better and am still on them. you dont have to take them forever and usually 6 months is recomended which usually allows enough time for the nero transmitters to correct them selves. maybe you should try them and see how you feel they are not addictive and you feel soo much happier. hope this helps

homecomfort Sat 09-Aug-08 22:34:26

sorry its so hard right now, i hope all getts better soon.
I use Cipralex myself and (for me) the best thing i ever did. I only have 10mg but it has helped me for the past 2 years. I also found it helps me with anxiety (again this is just me)

castlesintheair Sat 09-Aug-08 22:39:14

I've been on 20mg paroxetine for anxiety for a year. Make you cope and feel great but coming off them is (in most cases) very hard due to withdrawal symptoms. I'm into my 2nd month of withdrawal now. Have also caused me to gain weight. Also my sex drive hit rock bottom. If I had known about the 1st side effect in particular I would have asked for something else or maybe sought alternative therapies.

Hadassah Sat 09-Aug-08 22:46:33

I was on paroxetine 20mg for about two years. One year in I would not even contemplate coming off. About eighteen months in I felt pretty good and came off first by taking half a tablet every day, so a month's pack over two months, and then a quarter every day (I literally chopped them up - GP's suggestion) so a pack over four months. I never had side effects as far as I could tell and I was much happier afterwards so in all a really good experience. However, I also had counselling at the same time, so maybe that was the main thing. But they certainly did me no harm and I think they can be helpful.

BBJ Sun 10-Aug-08 12:34:09

Castlesintheair - do you mean your sex drive hit rock bottom while ON the ADs or since coming off them? (Worried as mine is low enough as it is!)

castlesintheair Sun 10-Aug-08 13:08:11

Whilst I was taking them. Doesn't affect everyone though.

jacobliam Sun 10-Aug-08 19:32:57

Hi, all that you have said is exactly how i was hen i had PND with my first. I had no idea what was happening and found it difficult to accept the dr diagnosing it. Reluctantly i took ADs citalopram. They did work very well, after 6 months i was ready to waen off them, and had no side effects. After 9 months of being on them i was back to my normal self..... HOWEVER, i think its really important to remember that the tablets are not to be relied upon, you have to change things yourself
My depression was about 2 things a baby that cried all the time, and being isolated.
I addressed the issue of a crying baby with the help of an osteopath and the dr, with in weeks he was a happy little thing!
Second, i learned to drive, and made myself join mother and toddler groups to make friends.
With the combintion of these things i got better.

My sister had been on ADs for 3 years, she souly relies on them to make her better, and has done nothing to address the issues.

Sorry to waffle on, but i hope it helps.
Being on ADs is nothing to be ashamed of at all.
Good luck.

Thefearlessfreak Sun 10-Aug-08 19:46:36

Hi BBJ
I'm sorry you're having a tough time too.
I have taken citalopram & found that they helped immensely & there is definitely a place for ADs; sometimes you need that help to be the first step so that you can even contemplate making more positive changes of your own volition (such as maybe get advice on your difficult neighbour!)

However...I would note that Citalopram seemed to lower my sex drive & affect my ability to orgasm. hmm I think it got better with time, but I found that really difficult as it made sex an effort for me.

If it is hormonal...have you thought about acupuncture or herbal meds? I know I can't prescribe on here but you could get some professional advice on things like Agnus Castus which balances hormones. I have found these really helpful in the past too. Do you get into exercise? Could help relieve the physical symptoms of stress you describe.

Good luck!

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