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SAHM's how do you keep yourself from going mad?

(68 Posts)
cupcake78 Tue 05-Aug-08 11:28:21

I have not worked for a year now and made the decision not to return to work only a couple of months ago. However I hate to admit it but I'm starting to go round the twist already.

DS is 10mths old, alot of my friends are busy back at work or have more than one child so their life is totally hectic. I am twiddling my thumbs to be honest. I play with DS loads, my house is clean and resonably tidy. I can't do anything for a long period ir gardening etc because DS gets restless after a short time. We go out most days even if its just an hour in the park, but I feel like I am starting to lose the plot. If I spend time with anyone they are usually over 65(grandparents).

How do you all do it? What do you do to fill in your days? I want to enjoy my time with my ds but am finding myself becoming more bored.

Dragonbutter Tue 05-Aug-08 11:32:22

You need a project.

I find that having a project on the go helps me to see that i am making progress each day/week. It's so hard to see your efforts paying off with kids.

I do mosaics, but i also like to have other arty craft projects on the go too. I don't get a chance to do them until the evening or the weekend, so progress is still slow. But that's what helps me.

Twiglett Tue 05-Aug-08 11:32:50


Shitehawk Tue 05-Aug-08 11:36:35

<passes Twiglett a couple of pencils to shove up her nose, and some underpants to put on her head>

<Joins in with the wibbling>

cupcake78 Tue 05-Aug-08 11:37:08

Thanks dragonbutter, thats a good idea and I am quite arty so I could start and do something. I have been going to college and intend to continue in Sept but its only for 5hrs a week but I really miss it at the moment.

beansprout Tue 05-Aug-08 11:37:49

<4 days into the summer holiday wibble>

MakemineaGandT Tue 05-Aug-08 11:38:52

It is hard cupcake - I've been at home now for 3.5 years. Most of the time it's fine, but I occasionally have the odd wobble and wonder what I am doing with my life. The chores and tedium do get me down. However, I look at my sons and I do feel reassured that I am doing he right thing - they are very well behaved, confident, delightful etc etc (well, the second is a bit young still to be sure about all that but hopefully he'll be like his big brother!). I'm sure I'm doing the right thing for them. In my difficult moments I remind myself that it's not forever, and the time will come when I am no longer bound to the house....

On a practical level, we get out frequently - even if just to pootle around the supermarket, go to the library etc. I try to keep the house tidy (do a tidy round as soon as they are in bed) but I don't worry about cleaning it obssessively - I just do it every couple of weeks. I have lots of hobbies - cooking, crafts etc - like Dragonbutter says it's nice to have visible evidence of something you have achieved!

Interested to hear others' replies....

cupcake78 Tue 05-Aug-08 11:39:06

lol at the wibbles! So its not just me.

CuckooClockWorkShy Tue 05-Aug-08 11:40:10

I went a bit mad when I worked. Clock-watching, juggling, trying to rise above all the politics, the stress, the injustices........(pay and so on)

I am sane only now that I'm a SAHM! grin

Othersideofthechannel Tue 05-Aug-08 11:41:52

Can someone please explain what all the wibbling is about? What is a wibble?

justaboutagrownup Tue 05-Aug-08 11:45:37

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sunshinetoast Tue 05-Aug-08 11:45:52

Go to loads of baby groups. At this age they are for you rather than your baby really, and they are a great way to make new friends who are also at home with a baby of a similar age. I found that I clicked with some groups and didn't with others, so it is worth trying a few. My library had a massive folder with details of all the groups locally so that could be a good place to start. We did swimming, music and signing.

sarah293 Tue 05-Aug-08 11:50:00

Message withdrawn

belgo Tue 05-Aug-08 11:51:29

I do a small amount of voluntary work on the computer, just enough to stop my brain freezing. I've also been involved with the PTA of dd1's school, I really enjoyed that.

Now the children are older I'm getting a little bored, and I would be looking for work, but I'm expecting my third baby soon so will stay a SAHM.

I also go to lots of playgroups for children, including music and craft groups.

I'll probably do a computer or language course next year.

pooter Tue 05-Aug-08 11:52:58

I can empathise with you cupcake. The way im trying to deal with it is to have a timetable (aaaggghhhh - cant get away from teaching!!) of activities. I have been very OTT and created a table of events that occur each day of the week, and what time, so if i have nothing in the diary i can get my table out and see at a glance that baby swimming is on, for example.

At least i havent coloured it in blush.

I also have two good friends with children the same age as DS (one i found on MN!) and one i found at the baby clinic - and we see each other regularly.

You definitely need to gather a few other SAHM together. Did you go to the NCT classes? If you babywear, there's, if you breastfeed there's the La LEche League meet ups.

Without these people and my trusty timetable I too would be wibbling (its a Blackadder goes Fourth OtherSide).

PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife Tue 05-Aug-08 11:55:24

<<begins making chicken noises, goes to join wibblers>>

Dragonbutter Tue 05-Aug-08 12:03:21

otherside - the wibblers are those who should have started this thread years ago.
alas, they are beyond help. wink

belgo Tue 05-Aug-08 12:03:49

<<wibbles at the thought of going back to work in 2/3 years time>>

Othersideofthechannel Tue 05-Aug-08 12:05:01

Thanks Pooter but I still don't understand. From the context I am guessing it means finding things tricky to cope with?

Othersideofthechannel Tue 05-Aug-08 12:05:43

Now you've confused me dragonbutter.

Shitehawk Tue 05-Aug-08 12:06:14

It means we didn't stop ourselves from going mad.

Did you never see Blackadder?

Othersideofthechannel Tue 05-Aug-08 12:08:17

I've googled and found this definition:

"Commonly used to describe chatter, content-free remarks or other essentially meaningless contributions to threads in newsgroups" but it doesn't really fit.

chelsygirl Tue 05-Aug-08 12:08:30

cupcake its very hard going but so worth it when your kids are older and you know everything you put into them has made them the happy, sensitive, decent, secure kids they are

Shitehawk Tue 05-Aug-08 12:09:11

You are googling the wrong Wibble.

Dragonbutter Tue 05-Aug-08 12:10:12

wibble (wib'l), adj., n., v.,-bled, -bling. -adj. a state of frenzied and irrational behaviour, often compared to that of headless chickens or similarly decapitated fowl. -n. gibberish, nonsensical, of bizarre and unusual nature. -v. to act in such a manner.

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