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AP types, reassure me (or not!)

(6 Posts)

DS has just turned one and on a recent visit to see lots of (fairly unfamiliar) family members he's been an absolute star. However, he's also been mega-clingy, which is nice in the short term (he's not a cuddly type) but has made me wonder about his attachment a bit. I don't think it's separation anxiety (he'll merrily crawl out of the room, even somewhere unfamiliar, sometimes without even a backward glance), and I am a bit concerned that he's so wary of 'strangers'.

He's had a tough start ('colic', just really overstimulated for most of his early life, chronically tired, very windy and miserable and I have been therefore quite stressed and anxious) but is really coming into himself now. I was so happy at the confidence he shows but this weekend he's suddenly become so clingy and sucky and reaches out to me whenever he's been with anyone else.

Is this normal at this age? It seems like such a personality shift.

On a cute note he's started to give massive cuddles to his Iggle Piggle, accompanied with "Aaaaaaaaaaah" noises [swoon]

ShowOfHands Tue 29-Jul-08 21:52:54

Substitute ds for dd and you're describing me and dd, even down to Iggle Piggle and "Aaaaaaaaah". It's normal, he's fine. smile

Thanks

I guess new territory is a fact of life when you're a parent. It's taking me a long time to grasp this!

belgo Wed 30-Jul-08 07:57:10

That's absolutely normal. Is he teething or a little ill? That can cause him to be more clingy.

It's normal to be wary of strangers - not just normal, but necessary from an evolutionary view!

My dd2 was very clingy, and I let her be, and now at aged nearly 3 she is very confident, and is very happy to go to nursery school and stay with her grandparents.

Instinct says I need to be with him when he wants me to be there. Sadly I have to go to work 4 days a week but he is with DP those days (although he seems to want me mostly at the moment, and wants to feed loads).

He might be teething, but then he's been teething for fecking eternity. Admittedly his hands are spending most of their time jammed in his mouth just now.

He also won't eat just now (unless it's something sweet hmm angry). I'm kind of torn - I want to feed him if he's actually hungry because eating is sore, but then I also feel like he's not interested in food because he's breastfeeding loads. We've already banned anything sweet for the forseeable future (birthday visit to ILs resulted in horrendous Milkybar and Petit Filous consumption). He has as many feeds as he wants in the night.

Sorry, all a bit off topic. belgo's post made me think maybe he's just feeling crap and I'm missing the blinking obvious blush

ShowOfHands Wed 30-Jul-08 10:13:40

Sorry for such a short reply last night, I was bfing dd!

My dd is 14 months and is extremely similar. She had an identical phase at 12 months. She's very confident and sociable usually but super clingy atm and mainly towards me. She is breastfeeding an awful lot, especially at night and snacks a lot during the day (the heat doesn't help but she is teething too). She isn't too hungry for solids at all but I'm not worried. I only want to drink when it's hot and her teeth are bothering her.

It's all normal. I know many women with children around the same age who are experiencing the same. I'd follow your ds's lead, feed if he wants and cuddle lots.

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