the worst mum in the world?

[giraffeINAMANGERski]

I am feeling so guilty!
Normally i find it really easy to deal with my dd, who is 21 months, and although she sometimes misbehaves (as toddlers do) i normally stop tantrums before they start and am pretty good at dealing with her, if that doesn't sound like boasting. But i had some bad news this morning,and then this afternoon i really lost it with her as she was trying to pull off all the tree decorations and open the presents -grrr! i shouted at her so harshly that she burst into tears and now i feel like a big bad ogre.
As far as i am concerened she wasn't really being naughty, just giving into temptation, which is understandable at her age and makes it completely unreasonable for me to have shouted at her- after all i have caught her a few times doing the same thing and usually a look from me does the trick. She was just really winding me up all day and i was so on edge i couldn't take it.
I know i shpouldn't have shouted at her and that it is not constructive at all, i also know why i did it. What i really need is someone to reassure me that she will not be damaged by this experience! I just feel awful. Will she remember this do you think?

[bigbananaflambe]

no way - she won't remember it - don't stress about it - If you are anything like me, this won't be the last time you shout at her and hate yourself! It's toatlly normal - she will not remember it and I bet she was back to her chirpy self quite quickly?

[DoesntChristmasDragOn]

It'll be forgotten by tomorrow.

[giraffeINAMANGERski]

yeah you're right she went off to bed quite happily, i'm just wallowing in self pity really!

[merrymarthamoo]

She will have forgotten it already - don't beat yourself up over it. My children push me to my limits sometimes - and I shout, even though I know it is neither helpful or constructive. We're human!

Btw, put the presents away 'til Christmas morning - there is no way on Earth I could leave my presents out on show and my two are 3 and 7. Make life easier for yourself!

Get her to bed, pour yourself a glass of wine, and chill out in front of the TV. You are forgiven

[leglepartridge]

oh no don't worry. i am still haunted by speaking to my ds1 in a really evil tone when I was pregnant with ds2 and he did something to nark me off. he looked at me with tears in his eyes and said "mummy" then started to sob. I still remember it vividly. He definitely doesn't. don't worry, you're only human!

[giraffeINAMANGERski]

(off to put away the pressies like a sensible mummy)- i only had them out to hide the bottom of the tree but thinking about it it is a bit mean really!

[kalex]

If this is the first time you have ever shouted at her at 21 months, either ou are a saint or she is. Don't sweat the small stuff, she'll soon be a teenager

Oh yes, and she has totallly forgotten it.

[giraffeINAMANGERski]

That's it- that's what made me feel so awful. It was the hurt, surprised look in her eyes which made me want to cry myself! Off loading it onto you all does help though, makes me feel better!

[kalex]

tHAT is why we are here

[xmascaroltygirl]

Nope. Long-term, that will have been much worse on you than it will be on your dd! Believe me, I have been there, done that, and sobbed by my dd1's bedside for half the night afterwards as she slept in blissful ignorance. Getting shouty when stressed is normal. Feeling like twelve types of wotsit afterwards is also normal! As far as your dd is concerned, tomorrow is a brand new day.

[BunglieOnTopOfTheChristmasTree]

You sound like a saint...she will not remember and I would not worry....the fact that you have worked yourself up about this incident shows what a good mummy you are.
Please do not worry about it....and have a wonderful Christmas and enjoy every minute with a toddler who's job is to test you to the limit!

Please do not worry have a wonderful Christmas it all sounds 'normal' to me.

[giraffeINAMANGERski]

thanks girls!
One never quite knows whether other people do the same things when the doors are closed, does one? I often wonder about whether other peoples houses are as untidy as mine too when theres nobody there, i suspect not though, lol!

[giraffeINAMANGERski]

i'll just lie back and bask in the compkliments now then- keep 'em coming!