Milk supply and dieting quandary

[BoobyBarbara]

A bit of backstory: DD is nearly 7 months old. When she was a newborn I tried to EBF but we discovered at 3.5 weeks that she had dropped to the 0.4 centile . The next 4 months I did pretty much everything to get BFing back on track (tongue tie specialists, reflux medication, multiple IBCLCs, power pumping... everything). It was a really dark time for me and I completely lost faith in my abilities and instinct as a mother and extremely miserable/depressed. At around 5 months I finally came to some sort of acceptance and found a routine that worked for us - I BF between midnight and 7am; in the day I pumped 4 times for 20 minutes each which got around 400ml and meant I could bottle feed 50/50 BM and formula.

Unfortunately all the stress and exhaustion (on top of all the bf issues she is also a terrible sleeper 😬) has meant that my weight has ballooned. I tried to go running (the only exercise I really love) but wet myself which was not fun. I have re started my pelvic floor exercises but I don't think the weight can be helping either. So I have started a diet.. nothing crazy and still eating a healthy balanced diet but of course the idea is to burn more calories than you consume. And my milk supply has tanked .

I don't know what to do... I've worked so so hard, shed so many tears and spent £££ to give DD the amount of milk that I do.. I really wanted to turn my experience into a positive story "it was hard but I still managed to give her 50% breast milk for a year " but I also want to feel good about myself again. None of my clothes fit (even some of the maternity ones!) and I'm living in joggers and sweatshirts. I'll be going back to work in 5 months which seems like a long time but isn't really and the idea of going back looking like I do now horrifies me - even more so the idea that dieting while doing my job is nigh on impossible and I would likely never lose the weight.

Would I be crazy to keep up the diet? Should I give it up in order to keep feeding breasts milk? start power pumping to increase supply? Give up breastfeeding altogether? Or just keep the pumping at the level it is now but accept that I'll only be producing a paltry amount?

Any words of wisdom/experience/advice would really be appreciated.

Thanks.

[BunnyRuddington]

Are you usually quite hard on yourself OP? What comes across is that you are not content with how are look and feel and how you've handled things so far.

I think talking all of this through with a BFC on one of the BFing Helplines might help you to process everything that's happened so far and whether you want to continue BFing.

From what I've read, dieting shouldn't affect your supply too much, but I could very easily be wrong. Do you think that stress might be affecting your supply in any way?

[Rubiales678]

I am no expert by any means but I would guess it matters more WHAT you are eating rather than how much ( ie too little) that could be affecting your milk supply. Are you taking vitamin D? Do you get plenty of calcium in your diet? Do you eat a healthy variety? If you are Strictly calorie counting and only eating pot noodles and biscuits I would guess that might affect milk supply ( I'm not saying this is what you are doing) breastfeeding does burn a lot of extra calories ( up to 500 I believe) so you should be fine to have 2000 a day and potentially lose weight if you are eating the right things? Again I'm no expert just my thoughts! At the end of the day it's your call whether to keep breastfeeding or not ( you're more likely to lose weight if you keep going but not a guarantee) . It's completely normal to feel like your body is completely not the same anymore . My stomach feels like a car crash since my c section 9 months ago but I try to feel proud that my body carried my baby for 9 months and also sustains him from breastfeeding , it has a more important job than how it looks!

[FolkSongSweet]

Why do you think your supply has tanked - pumping output? How is weaning going and is she still feeding as often at night? It could be to do with those things rather than your diet. Also can you increase your calories but make healthier choices? Or do some more exercise?

I was still a stone up on pre pregnancy weight when I stopped bf my first at 13 months. Half a stone fell off in days when I stopped. Never lost the last half but who cares. Breastfeeding can make you hold on to weight but if you stopped when she was say 11 months you’d still have a month to really work on it before you go back to work and you’d likely see really fast results.

It sounds like you’ve been through a lot and I echo the pps who have said be kinder to yourself and definitely talk it through with a bf specialist.

[Superscientist]

When calculating your calorific needs are you factoring in the calories required for breastfeeding?
Maybe it was too much of a change in diet at once? Would it be worth trying something in between your current diet and what you were eating before?

It's really hard to find the right balance with eating and breastfeeding. I am not pumping super frequently a couple of times a week and it's quite varied what I can get. I have been struggling to keep weight on as I'm breastfeeding an allergy baby so have had to remove a lot of food from my diet. Days when I have exerted more energy running and round doing chores and long walk to get baby to nap its harder to pump and my boobs feel softer.
I have also had pnd and find this is also true when I am having low difficult days. All of our physical, emotional and mental health impact on every thing

[Dozer]

Agree with PP that you’ve been very, very hard on yourself.

Sometimes pumping can’t keep supply up: two friends managed it for 3- 5 months then found they couldn’t keep going.

I stopped b-feeding DC1 at a similar stage because I was exhausted and mentally unwell, and had an unexpected pregnancy then early miscarriage. It helped me (although the primary problem was sleep deprivation-urgh!) and DC1 was fine, now a healthy teen!