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DS can't seem to entertain himself at all and he always following me about(7 Posts)
My ds is 4 and he never entertains himself even for a little while. Very rarely, he will go into his toy box and play with cars and so many other toys he haa or just make play in general with action men. He is always whining, climbing everywhere and following me about everywhere even if I want to go upstairs just to get something, he has to follow me and I end up shouting him to stay down stairs. If I sit down to chill out for a bit after doing chores, he sneaks into the kitchen and he knows it's out of bounds as he is unfortunately able to grab things that I have no control of, etc kettle for example so I tell him off and end up locking the door. Surely he should know that he shouldn't go in there? I'm still using door locks that are usually for toddlers! He runs up and down and I constantly have to tell him to sit still. We both do activities every day, including learning alphabets, numbers, drawing, writing, play dough, baking, going for walks, and he goes to school as I am a critical worker so he is always entertained but sometimes I just want to have peace and quiet. Every minute it's mummy, mummy, mummy. I was cooking and went to turn to drain pasta and he was standing right there! I just shouted at him to sit the fuck down, for goodness sake! The guilt eating away at me already because of course he's my boy and I love him but what the hell do I do? Why can't he just sit down or just do some colouring without following me about.
My DD is 5 and is similar. I’m trying to have specific times of day when she has to entertain herself eg for 45 min after lunch is “digestion time” and she needs to find something quiet to do while I clear up and sit down for a bit. Then after that we will do something together.
My 8 yo is much better at entertaining herself so I think this will improve as they get older!
My two youngest DCs were like this at the same age. It's exhausting. God, the non stop chatter so you can't hear yourself think or remember what you even went upstairs for! I don't know what helped but they do grow out of it. The middle one gradually got better around 5/6 (he is now 13 and I only see him when he's hungry!). My youngest is 8 and she has taken longer to be more independent and is still occasionally like it, but I think that's partly because she really needs a social life, clubs etc and she only has me during lockdown.
I think it's OK to bring in a daily quiet time (playing in room, looking at books) where you can have a cup of tea undisturbed. It might take a while but if you can establish it it might save your sanity.
Will he sit in front of the TV?
What do school/nursery have to say about it, is he able to concentrate when he's there?
My DD is the same, I think it's extra hard for them at the moment with everything going on but then again she was like that before all of this! One day they won't want to know us but that seems a long time away right now
I would second adding times of the day he has to entertain himself. Start small such as 10 minutes before lunch, give him a few options to play with and say he must not come to the table before he is called.
Lots of praise if he manages it and continue to build it into your routine.
Some kids are just like this.
DD is 11 and has never really amused herself with books or toys. She just stands in the corner of the room staring at the floor until I'm free to play with her. She'll literally wait all day if I'm working.
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