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For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Parenting

Do babies need dummies? Or can they forego

112 replies

amberbamber98 · 09/12/2020 13:03

Me and DF are TTC, in month 2 and of course as time goes on I wonder about little things about parenting!

One thing I did wonder is if babies have to have dummies?

I never thought of this really! But it was a random thought that crossed my head

DH has 2 nephews, 1 was given one and still has it at 18 months. His parents say they regret it as it’s made his teeth grow a certain way (don’t know anything about this just what they said) and delayed and affected his speech? Just as he’s always had one and is quite adamant to not give it up

His other nephew is 4 and never had one they never used one and they’re set on the fact that dummies cause teeth and speech/language issues

I didn’t really think of this as me and my brother never had dummies my mother said! DF had one apparently until he was 5

So does it really affect teeth/speech and language? And can babies go without it?

Or do they need it at one time or another!

OP posts:

Report

Findahouse21 · 09/12/2020 13:04

Nope, they definitely don't need to have one if they're not inclined. Neither of my dd's have had one.

Mousepad20 · 09/12/2020 13:05

Had decided I didn't want to use one and didn't - although with ever-so-useful hindsight I think it may have be worthwhile at times 😊

littleharissa · 09/12/2020 13:10

We found one really useful.

When breastfeeding, babies will often suck for comfort and not for milk.
This cannot be replicated with formula. They then end up sucking for comfort, drinking milk, and being sick because they've drank so much.

So when FF we found it really useful as it helped soothe DS in between feeds when he would've otherwise come to the boob for comfort

But honestly, they're so baby dependent. Some babies love them, some hate them.

We got rid of ours at 6 months.

They can become an issue if used over 1 year old.

Whynotnowbaby · 09/12/2020 13:11

Neither of mine had them. One became a thumb-sucker and has just got over it now at 8. It wasn’t a problem though, her teeth and speech were both fine despite the thumb-sucking.

littleharissa · 09/12/2020 13:11

Just as he’s always had one and is quite adamant to not give it up

This is quite easily solved with good parenting though

mooncakes · 09/12/2020 13:13

Breastfed babies don't need one, but bottle fed babies do need to comfort suck.

If you get rid of them by about 18 months they are unlikely to cause any problems and do prevent thumb sucking which is much harder to get rid of.

Muckish · 09/12/2020 13:13

Of course they don't. Some babies won't take one at all, even with desperate parents attempting to introduce it. We also found it useful, as I wasn't able to BF, but it was only ever as a transition to sleep at nap and bedtime, and he stopped using it without any difficulty, and no teeth or speech issues.

Ginfilledcats · 09/12/2020 13:14

My 6 month old doesn't and has never used or wanted one. She ducks her thumb very occasionally, and maybe suckles for comfort at times but it's no bother. Before the invention of dummies I guess they'd have just used boobs or thumbs?

I have no problem with dummies can see where they'd be useful. But I do hate seeing babies in peaks or playing with their dummies in, doesn't seem a need.

As for the battles some have getting rid of a dummy, I guess it will be just as tough trying to stop thumb sucking!

Each to their own

whatswithtodaytoday · 09/12/2020 13:15

They don't need them, some hate them. For some they're beneficial though - you won't know until you try. Personally I didn't intend to use them, but my baby had reflux and cried endlessly. A dummy settled him (and my fraught nerves) and helped him get through the rubbish digestion part of babyhood.

I got rid of them at around six months when he started spitting them out for fun, as I didn't want him to have them when older.

TaraRhu · 09/12/2020 13:16

No they don't need one. Ours was a godsend with our son though. He just wanted to suckle constantly. It's now become a bit of a comfort blanket. We restrict access now to bed time and when he is mega upset as it's the only thing that calms him down. Hope to get rid of it completely soon. He's 2 now so it really needs to go. His teeth and speech are fine though.

Megan2018 · 09/12/2020 13:16

I never had one as a child and DD didn’t have one. I EBF DD and co-slept so technically I was the dummy.
Very glad we didn’t use one though as nothing to give up now. DD doesn’t suck her thumb either (but we are still BF at 15 months).
I did buy a pack just in case but never used them.

ArchbishopOfBanterbury · 09/12/2020 13:17

I wanted to use one, but my baby was really not keen. He just spat it out.

Some babies don't get on with them, but if they do, it can be helpful in the beginning. Just get rid of them before it affects their teeth and talking.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 09/12/2020 13:17

Some babies have a real need to suckle. Dummies also seem to be helpful in mitigating some SIDS risks. Some babies take to dummies, some don't.

If a dummy is used, then effective parenting will reduce/eliminate any speech/teeth damage.

If a dummy isn't used, baby may take to sucking on their thumb or finger, which I would imagine is harder to tackle later as you cannot remove it.

SomethingWycked · 09/12/2020 13:17

Despite being breastfed, my DS wouldn't have one. We tried a few types but he would spit them out. It was hard at times without one but on the flip side, they can be difficult to get rid of. It seems to depend on the baby.

Buttercupcup · 09/12/2020 13:19

2 babies one was a fan one wasn’t. My first was given a dummy in SCBU as he had some issues with his suck due to facial nerve issues and the dummy really helped stimulate this. He had it for about 6 months for naps and to settle if he was really unhappy. My 2nd wouldn’t entertain a dummy when she could be attached to my nipple instead. Used appropriately they can be really useful. From what I understand they only effect teeth and speech when used a lot not just for sleep/naps/usual newborn comfort sucking.

happymummy12345 · 09/12/2020 13:19

No definitely not. None of my mums 3 children ever had one. My son never had one either. I hate them. I would never ever shove an ugly bit of plastic in my child's mouth. Should be banned

Disappointedkoala · 09/12/2020 13:20

Both of mine have/had them. It's a comfort thing and tbh I'm rather a fan of sleeping! It's also recommended to help reduce the risk of SIDS so that's positive. Eldest DD ditched hers with a minimum of fuss at 2yo.I think you get problems when toddlers have them in all the time but we were strict about it only being for sleeping.

peboh · 09/12/2020 13:20

@littleharissa

Just as he’s always had one and is quite adamant to not give it up

This is quite easily solved with good parenting though

Not always the case. My dd is 2 in December and I would love to get rid of her dummies, however he level of understanding isn't appropriate right now for her to understand nor is her ability to self soothe. Nothing to do my parenting style. Also her paediatrician also recommended her keeping the dummy a while longer as she has an oral fixation and it helps her to stop trying to put everything in her mouth especially inappropriate things.

littleharissa · 09/12/2020 13:20

@happymummy12345

No definitely not. None of my mums 3 children ever had one. My son never had one either. I hate them. I would never ever shove an ugly bit of plastic in my child's mouth. Should be banned

YAY!

Here's your award.

Was waiting for a comment like yours.

huuskymam · 09/12/2020 13:21

No they don't need them. My first two never had them. My third did, it was actually recommended by a nurse because his little mouth kept going even though he would have been fed and asleep.

peboh · 09/12/2020 13:21

Op they do not need one, also some babies take the them, some don't. Entirely up to you if you want to give one. Out dd only had one because she was nil to mouth when born, so the ward she was on gave her one to help comfort and soothe when she wasn't allowed milk. If that hadn't happened I would have happily not given her one.

BertieBotts · 09/12/2020 13:22

You don't need it.

You might want it.

I recommend waiting to see

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amberbamber98 · 09/12/2020 13:25

Thank you!

If I can I’ll try to forego them as I do see DF nephew with his in even when we’re at the dinner table, he’ll take it out to eat then put back in and I do think it’s good for comfort but that’s a bit unnecessary!

They also don’t take well to comments that are helpful about taking dummy away (even though they regret the dummy?) so yeah we just leave them to it! Me and DF never made any comments as were not parents yet we don’t get it

But yes this is quite interesting as a whole! I keep thinking about eventually getting pregnant and the obvious stuff like me trying to be as healthy as possible, learning about safe sleeping, how we’d establish a routine when DF goes back to work.

Dummies was just a random thought where I did take a minute and think are they essential?! A niche subject but interesting

OP posts:

SparkyBlue · 09/12/2020 13:26

My three DC were premature so they were given to help them suck as of course pre DC I was adamant Id never use them. Honestly OP these are decisions you can't even think about making until you actually have a baby

PrincessConsuelaBH · 09/12/2020 13:26

@Mousepad20

Had decided I didn't want to use one and didn't - although with ever-so-useful hindsight I think it may have be worthwhile at times 😊

Exactly this for me!

We made the decision not to give DD one, although I came close a few times just to see if we could get more sleep

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