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Advice please - 3 month old waking every 2 hours at night

(31 Posts)
NLW91 Sun 22-Nov-20 01:09:28

I’m a FTM. My boy is 16lbs so not little. He can do a good stretch at start of the night. Can be up to 5 hours. After this he tends to wake up every 2 hours afterwards. I exclusively breast feed and tend to offer every time he wakes but thinking now he may just want the comfort and if he can stretch even just a couple more hours it’ll be an achievement. Any suggestions and advice from mums who have had similar experiences? I try to give him as much milk as I can throughout the day but sometimes he just doesn’t want it so I can’t force him to. Thanks

OP’s posts: |
PlantDoctor Sun 22-Nov-20 01:29:55

That's really normal, I'm afraid. I had the same thing with my DD, but they do sleep better as they get older. At 4 months I started occasionally bringing my daughter into our bed from about 5am just so I could doze while she fed, although I appreciate not everyone is comfortable with this.

I didn't do this as DH was working, but could you express milk and ask your partner if you have one to do one of the feeds just so you can get a longer block of sleep?

NLW91 Sun 22-Nov-20 01:48:53

PlantDoctor

That's really normal, I'm afraid. I had the same thing with my DD, but they do sleep better as they get older. At 4 months I started occasionally bringing my daughter into our bed from about 5am just so I could doze while she fed, although I appreciate not everyone is comfortable with this.

I didn't do this as DH was working, but could you express milk and ask your partner if you have one to do one of the feeds just so you can get a longer block of sleep?

@PlantDoctor he’s really reluctant to take bottle at the moment. He did take it when he was little and OH would give him a bottle early evening but he eventually grew out of needing that feed. I have bought him into our bed numerous times to doze off together. I’ve just read so many things that say they should be only feeding twice at night now at this age.

OP’s posts: |
olderthanyouthink Sun 22-Nov-20 02:15:21

Only twice a night?! Naaaaah look up biologically normal infant sleep babies wake a lot, helps prevent SIDS and boobing back to sleep is sooooo effective I refuse to give it up

https://sarahockwell-smith.com/2016/10/24/its-time-to-stop-with-the-sleep-guilt/

DD is just 2 and still wakes every 3 hours max, sorry but she's still in the range of normal! She gets in our bed and helps her self to milk and goes back to sleep with me, I don't do much night waking at all anymore, in fact DO does more as he takes her to the toilet in the night

Englishgirl9 Sun 22-Nov-20 04:55:04

If you are considering sleep training at all, some of those provide advice on cutting comfort feeding. For example the TCB method advises dream feeding at 10.30pm and 3.30am but slowly reducing the time of the 2nd feed by 2-3 mins each night until it is gone and then the same for the first. And if they wake up crying at other times, help them learn to go back to sleep independently rather than comfort feeding.

I say this when we are on night 1 of this plan with our 6 month old. He has been waking up 4 times a night the last month and gets fed each time. Tonight he has only woken up once so far (5am now!) and had the 2 dream feeds.

I can send you some materials if you pm me if you're interested.

Letsallscreamatthesistene Sun 22-Nov-20 05:26:28

3 months is way to little to sleep train

Dramacoats Sun 22-Nov-20 05:30:37

It’s normal I’m afraid. Sleep is developmental, and in my opinion not a lot you can do to improve it. It will get better on its own. 4-6 months was terrible for us but big improvements after that

KatieKat88 Sun 22-Nov-20 06:20:49

Yep completely normal at that age and sleep isn't linear - it gets better and worse at different points. It is tough and you have my sympathy! I've been awake since 3.30am with my 12 month old who's been dozing on and off since then... please don't consider sleep training until at least 6 months (if only because they hit the 4 month sleep issues and the whole ordeal was pointless, but mostly because they're far too young and are meant to need you at night, it's part of their inbuilt protection from SIDS). There will be better times and I won't say sleep in the day when baby sleeps because that never worked for me, but do rest, have enough food and drink (especially with BFing) and don't expect too much of yourself - you don't have to be 'normal' yet and out and about or cleaning all of the time. Make sure your DH is helpful when he's around (cooking, cleaning, holding/changing baby). You're not in this alone and many of us have been or still are in your position flowers

Mamabear12 Sun 22-Nov-20 07:14:27

Sounds very normal for a breastfed baby. My latest baby (have 3 dc) woke every 1-2 hours the first month in for feeds, then 2-3 hours. When I got 3 hours I felt finally! She finally slept through at 9/10 months. But not always and can still wake once at least 2-3 times a week (still fully breastfeeding). Many who formula feed (friends) say their babies are doing 8 hours stretched by 2-3 months and sleep through the night fast as well. It’s because formula is more difficult for baby to digest:

ASomers Sun 22-Nov-20 07:53:57

I have a 3 month old and her sleep is just the same. She can sleep for up to 6 hours at the start of the night and then wakes every 1-2 hours ish after. It's normal and I don't think there's much that can be done as sleep is developmental.

northstars Sun 22-Nov-20 08:18:55

Please don’t sleep train a 3 month old. This is all normal, one of my DC used to wake several times a night until age 2!

Thatwentbadly Sun 22-Nov-20 08:50:44

I think it’s a good night if my 16 month old only feeds twice over night. He is 3 months old, he needs comfort and doesn’t need to be stretched.

FizzingWhizzbee123 Mon 23-Nov-20 21:34:08

Read up on the 4 month sleep regression. My DD started his at 3 months too. It’s their sleep cycle maturing. It’ll improve once they learn to link their sleep cycles, it just takes a bit of time.

NLW91 Mon 23-Nov-20 23:17:09

FizzingWhizzbee123

Read up on the 4 month sleep regression. My DD started his at 3 months too. It’s their sleep cycle maturing. It’ll improve once they learn to link their sleep cycles, it just takes a bit of time.

I think it could be as I’m not doing anything differently. He’s even struggling to do his first long stint of sleep undisturbed now. He just wiggles and moves so much and works himself up

OP’s posts: |
Lalapurple Tue 24-Nov-20 00:13:24

He sound very normal.
Are you getting enough sleep?

ClaireP20 Tue 24-Nov-20 00:15:30

Bring him into bed with you. That's whatbI do and it's brilliant, he's on my boob and I'm sound asleep! Trust me...x

ClaireP20 Tue 24-Nov-20 00:18:02

Thatwentbadly

I think it’s a good night if my 16 month old only feeds twice over night. He is 3 months old, he needs comfort and doesn’t need to be stretched.

Exactly. He needs to be near you and smell you - not stretched or sleep trained or any nonsense. Lay him next to you in bed, you'll automatically sleep in a safe way, you'll both get what you need.

SleepingStandingUp Tue 24-Nov-20 00:19:32

Another vote for normal baby, please don't sleep Train at 3 months.

Is Dad in the picture? Is there anything he can do so you get more sleep? Can you grab an early night after a feed and never DH to change him etc and settle him?

GlassLake Tue 24-Nov-20 00:31:35

northstars

Please don’t sleep train a 3 month old. This is all normal, one of my DC used to wake several times a night until age 2!


Same here!

NLW91 Tue 24-Nov-20 06:02:29

ClaireP20

Bring him into bed with you. That's whatbI do and it's brilliant, he's on my boob and I'm sound asleep! Trust me...x

Yeah he’s been in bed with me. He suckles and drops off but 10 mins later is wiggling around everywhere

OP’s posts: |
NLW91 Tue 24-Nov-20 06:03:53

Lalapurple

He sound very normal.
Are you getting enough sleep?

I’ve been really tired and feel like I could get more sleep. Not been so bad tonight but still not great

OP’s posts: |
NLW91 Tue 24-Nov-20 06:04:50

SleepingStandingUp

Another vote for normal baby, please don't sleep Train at 3 months.

Is Dad in the picture? Is there anything he can do so you get more sleep? Can you grab an early night after a feed and never DH to change him etc and settle him?

OH sleeps downstairs. He takes him out during the day for couple hours or so so I can rest. He won’t settle with anyone else but me right now

OP’s posts: |
Mishmased Tue 24-Nov-20 06:33:40

Honestly very normal for a 3 month old especially breastfed. Way too young for any form of sleep training. Maybe a bedtime routine and dad giving a dream feed at night before he heads to bed. Take it easy, it is tough at that age. Try to sleep when you can.

PotteringAlong Tue 24-Nov-20 06:37:38

Completely normal. And if he’s anything like mine he will still be waking up every few hours at a year old too. But your body gets more used to it!

He’s far too young to sleep train. You just have to roll with it.

Blahblahface Tue 24-Nov-20 06:37:49

If he's wriggling a lot and restless rather than wanting to feed, it could be something you've eaten disagreeing with him.

Its normal for BF babies to still be waking regularly at night at this age. I found 3 months was the time that sleep turned, either for the worse or the better.

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