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Parenting

No tv for 3 year old?

18 replies

mamma1234 · 21/11/2020 14:59

I try and limit my 3 year old to one programme a day - 30 mins ish but am finding that now it's the only thing he wants to do pretty much!

I'm tired of the constant battles and I don't want him watching all the time. He doesn't really ask to do much else now, which makes me feel sad.

My thinking is if I take it away, he'll gradually stop asking for it and do other things?

Does anyone have any experience of this please?

OP posts:
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pjani · 21/11/2020 19:54

My DS who is 2 is similar and yes having days off tv seems to help.

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Dalooah · 21/11/2020 19:55

I definitely agree with days off. Maybe it could be a weekend treat?

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Marylou62 · 21/11/2020 19:59

I've nannied for families that don't have tvs or any screens and the children managed well.. I used to just tell mine that the telly was broken! (switched off at plug and showed them that the light wasn't working)..

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suziedoozy · 21/11/2020 20:09

I’ve got to be honest I support as little TV as possible for small children. I’m not convinced it adds much to their lives and if it is causing an issue just stop them watching it.

We aren’t at that stage yet - mine isn’t quite 2 so doesn’t watch any TV at all.

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Lazypuppy · 21/11/2020 21:28

1 programme a day seems very very low to me, but i suppose everyone is different. We as a family watch a lot of tv, so it would be hypocritical not to let dd watch it too.

My daughter watches at least 1 film a day, more on weekends, and then watches a couple of shows here and there and before bed.

We've always watched quite a bit of tv though so not anything weird for her.

She plays with all her other toys, and is at nursery every morning anyway so thats her tv free time.

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legalseagull · 21/11/2020 22:08

I don't really get why people think the tv is so evil. As part of a balanced day what's wrong with watching it? My toddlers will watch a bit of CBeebies in the morning, then we'll go to the park, home for lunch, nap, play/activity like painting, bit more tv, dinner, books bath bed. As long as they're getting variety it's really no different to them looking at books or playing with a toy. It's really helped my daughters speech too

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Lazypuppy · 21/11/2020 22:23

legalseagull i agree.

I also think its like crisps and chocolate etc, if you make it something that is off limits, kids don't learn how to enjoy it in moderation, and when you do finally let them watch it they'll want to binge watch it cause its new and so exciting.

Tv shows and disney films have been brilliant for my daughters speech, she can remember certain scenes, and knowsthe words to all the songs. She feels other peoples emotions and knows when things are sad or happy and properly follows the film.

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Disappointedkoala · 21/11/2020 22:47

Agree with legalseagull and Lazypuppy it's all about moderation. My DD has TV at set times and I always give her a warning before it gets switched off and it's time to do something else. I mostly use it for down time before eating (so I can get meals prepped and any cleaning up from playing/crafts done). She only watches stuff on Cbeebies and a lot of it is really high quality - she probably sees more diversity and inclusion than adults do watching BBC or ITV in the evening. We have pretty busy days (today was playing, scooter, more playing, park, supermarket) and I don't think it hurts to have 30 minutes before dinner chilling out on the sofa watching JoJo & GranGran.

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LolaSmiles · 21/11/2020 22:50

I aree legalseagull and Lazypuppy.

Sometimes it feels like people think TV is the devil or, worse, they want parenting of the year badges for having the least amount of TV.

Whilst putting kids in front of a screen all day is a bad thing to do, as part of a varied life with lots of experiences and interaction it seems a bit silly to set arbitrary limits.

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BeautifulSofa · 21/11/2020 22:58

My 2.5yo loves the telly and prob watches too much but in these Covid times, there is eff all else to do so I'm not beating myself up about it. School run with older ones done? Spot of telly while I wash up brekkie. After lunch pre school run? Spot of telly while I have a coffee and social media / news. 4.30? Spot of telly with her siblings while I sort dinner. Gin

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Merename · 21/11/2020 23:01

We don’t have a tv, didn’t have for years before kids arrived because...just got fed up of it really, no big feelings of it being evil. So once kids were old enough for cartoons etc they just watch a bit on Netflix or prime. We like that they aren’t exposed to adverts, mainly, and we don’t allow YouTube as I think the way my eldest will want to swipe through piles of shite every minute or two isn’t good for her.

But, they will still watch something say 5 out of 7 days, so not much different to someone with a tv who limits it. So if you are considering taking it away, be aware that his requests could just be for another device, I suppose you need to be confident you’re happy to have no telly and I certainly would miss the option to keep them occupied while I have a shower or make dinner.

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fonxey · 21/11/2020 23:03

My bubby is only 11m so no tv for her though she did watch me play a video game mostly she is not interested and last time the tv was on (but my choice) she cried until it was switched off.


But i intend to let her because as others day or becomes more desirable if you don't. I just don't see the point in her watching it under 1.

30m seems but enough. Either i would think remove completely or last year watch a bit more. Bit a lot but a bit more.

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Tootsietoot · 21/11/2020 23:09

We had a no TV during the week for years growing up with our DC. At three they barely watched at all. It did involve a bit more effort on getting them set up doing things but it meant that they spent hours playing with Lego/reading/drawing/running around /making up games far more than the times when we slacked off (usually following a bout of illness with one of them when we would let them all on watch more). I have to say as a result now they are teenagers (we still limit screen time but are much more lax) they seem to have much more range of interests than their friends and cousins.

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Tootsietoot · 21/11/2020 23:10

Also their behaviour was much better on into screen days than screen days. Especially once gaming became a thing

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NameChange30 · 21/11/2020 23:12

I think it's fine to let young kids watch a bit of tv but it is an issue with DS (3) for two reasons; firstly he asks to watch tv all the time and it's annoying, secondly he often has tantrums when we turn it off which is even more annoying. I continue to let him watch it because he doesn't nap any more so it's down time for him (and me!) plus since DC2 was born he just wants my attention all the fucking time and it's the only thing that absorbs him enough to give me a break. Sorry, not sorry.

I didn't write anything helpful at all, did I?! Confused I am thinking of getting an egg timer or something to see if that will help with the tantrums when it's time to turn the tv off. And maybe doing a visual poster with our routine for the day including tv time in the hope that he might ask less at other times...

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Rosesandchocolates · 21/11/2020 23:23

Got to be honest. Peppa pig is a staple in my house, especially at naptime. DD watched a lot of tv. But she also gets a lot of fresh air and does plenty of activities. When we move to our bigger house we’ll probably have it on less.

Honestly, I love snuggling up with her to watch cartoons with a cup of tea. She does 3 full days at nursery and needs the chill time. Parenting is hard- I don’t know how I’d get anything done without it. She’s happy and I’m happy.

If it’s on she usually gets bored after about 20 mins so I just turn it off rather than having it in the background.

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Bathrum · 21/11/2020 23:24

I know what you mean, OP, my 3 year old DS is similar - he mainly asks for TV rather than other activities or toys and it makes me feel bad.

Thing is, like PPs, I also don't think TV is evil. And it's massively useful in helping me get on with chores/cooking I need to do. So, in an attempt to provide balance, and squash the mum guilt I inevitably feel, I've recently settled in a daily tick list of vague things I'd like to do with my kids, and if I've done these things, then I meant the effort to consciously not feel bad for the TV they watch. My 'to do list' is: some exercise (pref outside, so, park or trip to beach or scooter somewhere), something creative (drawing or painting or stickers or something), something imaginative (pretend play etc), reading (bedtime usually covers this! With my older DD I want to hear her read to me, as well as reading to her) and maybe something educational for my 3 year old (eg a puzzle or a game around letters or numbers).

Since I've had this mindset, I've noticed that I do these things anyway as a matter of course and so the TV time doesn't seem too bad. Basically I've realised that, even though I thought too much of our lives revolved around the TV, it actually doesn't and they have a fairly balanced life really.

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LizzieMacQueen · 21/11/2020 23:29

I was quite liberal with the tv remote and, when my son's first clear words were 'telly on' at 18 months, I was mortified!

But he's grown into a non-tv dependent adult (although I'll admit he likes watching films and documentaries on US politics).

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