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Parenting

Night nanny - worth it?

34 replies

caniaskaquestionplease · 03/10/2020 16:43

Hi - I'm wondering if anyone used a night nanny and whether they thought it was worth it? I know if I want one I have to book months and months in advance and it is v. v. expensive. Do people have a night nanny every night for a few weeks, or is it 3/4 nights a week - how does it work?

Thanks in advance!!

OP posts:
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Lockdownseperation · 03/10/2020 18:56

I wish I had the money for that kind of thing. I can’t imagine how it would work with breast feeding so you would need to formula feed and even then I think your baby would be very confused and upset to be away from you. It all depends on how you want to parent.

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BeingATwatItsABingThing · 03/10/2020 19:00

No idea how it works but I can’t imagine letting someone else other than DH or me try and settle our newborn. DD2 is nearly 2 weeks old and I am absolutely knackered but this is such a short time in her life and all she has ever known is me at this point.

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WhoseThatGirl · 03/10/2020 19:01

If your baby’s crying your awake. Someone else’s helping out feels like it would only make is marginally better. Feeding only takes a few minutes so if they just feed then go back to sleep it’s not that bad. It’s the refusing to go back to sleep and fussing that’s difficult.
If your totally loaded and have a big house then it might be okay. But I think a cleaner, house keeper, mother’s help type thing would be much more useful. A chief would be good too.

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WhoseThatGirl · 03/10/2020 19:01

*you’re

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Debradoyourecall · 03/10/2020 19:05

It wouldn’t have worked for me as my second baby started refusing bottles at about a month old and everything we tried to get her to take one again failed. So it was back to the breast feeding every two hours. My first baby refused to take any bottles ever. Babies are unpredictable! I would have loved some help at the time they were newborns though, I was absolutely desperate for sleep. If you can afford it a night nanny must be lovely.

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SummerInSun · 03/10/2020 19:06

Can't help personally, but I know a number of women who have had one and swear by it. They still exclusively breast fed, but it meant they were only up in the night when actually feeding, so were in much better shape to enjoy their baby during the day. The night nanny also got the baby into a sensible sleep routine. Call a few agencies and ask them to explain to you how it works, and then interview a few possibles and see how they say they'd approach it.

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TheEC · 03/10/2020 19:19

Personally I’d rather do the nights myself and have extra help in the day. Although the odd night or two sounds nice. There’s something special about it being 3am and just being up and cuddling your baby, I wouldn’t want to lose that altogether

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HelloRose · 03/10/2020 19:29

I thought about hiring one pre-baby. However once the baby was here, I just couldn't imagine how it would work. Firstly because I was breastfeeding and also I just couldn't sleep through my baby crying. Even when dh got up I would still be awake! So great idea in principle, but on a practical level definitely wasn't one for me.

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HelloRose · 03/10/2020 19:31

@TheEC completely agree with this!

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Letsallscreamatthesistene · 03/10/2020 20:29

I wanted one and tried to book one at the last minute - obviously with no success. I would 100% get one for a few nights a week if I were to have another.

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Nackajory · 03/10/2020 20:34

I loved getting up in the night with my kids, it was like a secret time for us. Tiring but I wouldn't have missed it for the world. Save your money and enjoy the time with your baby, it'll be gone before you know it. Its so precious don't give it to anyone else.

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BeautyAndTheBump1 · 03/10/2020 20:58

I think it would be a great idea to give you a break.
I see lots of comments about breastfeeding but cant see that you've written that you're breastfeeding so I'm guessing people are just assuming? Or have I missed something?

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Lockdownseperation · 03/10/2020 21:58

@BeautyAndTheBump1 maybe the fact that approx 80% of women in the U.K start off by breast feeding.

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Caspianberg · 04/10/2020 09:10

I’m not sure how it would work here. Breastfeeding also, and baby wakes feeds and resettles straight after 95% of the time.

Daytime baby needs walking around to sleep so I would rather have daytime help tbh. I have just got a cleaner to help due to non put down able baby. If someone could come 4-7pm when he is moaniest that would be great. They could then spend an hour walking him around the block (again).

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Ihaveoflate · 04/10/2020 09:22

Even if I could afford one, I'm not sure it would have worked for all the reasons mentioned (and I FF from birth so no issue there).

I also just don't think I would have felt comfortable with a stranger in my house at night time, though I would never judge a person for using a night nanny. If I had that kind of money, I would hire a housekeeper instead to do the cleaning/laundry/food shopping etc. Or possibly a daytime nanny for a few days a week.

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Parker231 · 04/10/2020 09:30

My friend was gifted the services of a night nanny by her MIL. She said it was amazing and is secretly hoping for the same present when she has her next baby.

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BeautyAndTheBump1 · 04/10/2020 09:53

@Lockdownseperation and??? Its extremely ignorant to assume.

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justanotherneighinparadise · 04/10/2020 09:55

Nope. I can clearly remember this story of Susan Sarandon’s daughter when it came out.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/m.huffpost.com/us/entry/us_586a2cabe4b0d9a5945bf8ca/amp

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caniaskaquestionplease · 04/10/2020 10:02

Thanks for all the replies! Really helpful

I do want to breastfeed (if I am able to) so yes I would have to do the night feeds so I'm not sure what the nanny actually does - but I'm just getting told by lots of people that NNs are a lifesaver. I think I need to do some more research

OP posts:
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LittleBearPad · 04/10/2020 10:04

I can’t see why it would help in a normal house. If you can sleep through in another wing! maybe.

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Lockdownseperation · 04/10/2020 10:06

@BeautyAndTheBump1 you asked if people are assuming and what you have missed so I was suggesting that you missed that it’s a reasonable consideration that OP may need to think about. The OP asked for other people’s opinions and that’s exactly what people gave their opinion in if it would work in their own situation.

@caniaskaquestionplease definitely look up the details of a private lactation consultant. You may not need them but it’s best to know where you can get help in advance if the situation.

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Letsallscreamatthesistene · 04/10/2020 11:57

The night nanny deals with feeds, rocking back to sleep, nappy changes and getting the baby dressed for the day.

I would have thought you need to formula feed to make it worthwhile though.

They also ask for a spare room and a spare bed

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justanotherneighinparadise · 04/10/2020 12:13

I think you’d be better off getting some ad hoc help for the day so you could have a nap than have another person take over the night shift. It’s an intense time and with that comes a very strong bond. I’ll admit six months of three hours a night nearly broke me but my god I’d do it all again. I really think those times were key looking back. What I’d have given my right arm for though was someone to come in in the day for a few hours and let me catch up with some sleep. If I were allowed I used to grab a very deep two hour afternoon sleep and it was magic.

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gigi556 · 04/10/2020 13:11

The only people I know who had night nannies have had multiples (one twins, one triplets). They said night nanny was a god send!

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YouveGotMeWhosGotYou · 04/10/2020 13:18

I worked for a well off family. The night nanny would come into the room and put the baby on mums breast, then return back to her room where the baby would sleep in a cot. More impressive was the she managed to do it in the dark so as not to disturb the husband,and most times the mum would barely wake up!

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