This is a Premium feature
To use this feature subscribe to Mumsnet Premium - get first access to new features see fewer ads, and support Mumsnet.Start using Mumsnet Premium
Anything good to say about kids?!(73 Posts)
Hi everyone, I’m a visitor from the pregnancy board - I’m expecting my first child and just going into my second trimester.
Tentatively been looking up advice on becoming a parent, but everything I find on the Internet seems to be a list of miseries and complaints about what horrible little brats they are.
Like do I really need to read another article about kids pooing everywhere? Or breaking possessions? Or having tantrums in the supermarket? I get it - kids break stuff and make a mess!!!
I was really hoping to find a few happy stories. I refuse to believe it’s all as horrible as people say!
So... anyone got any nice, positive things they’d like to share about kids and parenthood? Maybe something to make me actually look forward to it..?
DD is 17 and like a really annoying skint best mate. I love her more than anything and she brings utter joy to my life 😂
DS is 10 and is the funniest most sarcastic little toe rag I’ve ever met and from day one he has been my sidekick and partner in crime. I wouldn’t be without him for a second.
Parenting is ace. It’s tiring and boring and relentless at times. But if you’re lucky you get out of it humans who make you laugh, provide comfort, genuine moments of wonder and a never ending source of love. Worth it in my book 👍🏻
I HATE all this constantly negative stuff!
Having kids has been the best thing I've ever done, and I say this as someone with an exciting career I'm very passionate about.
The love you receive and naturally know how to give. The fun and joy every day. The purpose and meaning life suddenly has. Boring tasks are suddenly imbued with a sense of fun or a laugh about something silly. Buying cute clothes and gifts (becomes more fun than shopping for yourself). Reading to them and teaching them. Visiting theme parks and museums and places you've not had reason to visit for decades. Smiles and hugs.
Yes there are stresses and hard parts but I never for a second don't feel grateful & I look back on my life pre kids and it feels a bit boring to be honest!
The first two years are just plain hard work but you will learn more and develop more as a human than you thought possible. You will realise just how resilient you are, what you will do to care for another human and how amazing women really are. As they get older you will just stare at them every now and then in wonder of who they are and their personality, how kind they can be, how you are their everything and you could burst and cry at the same time with your feelings for them.
That's what keeps you going through all the shitty stuff!
There are negatives to being a parent, absolutely. However for me the positives far outweigh them.
I adore my 2 (soon to be 3). I can't imagine my life without them- all of the laughter, fun and love.
My little boy is our delight. He makes everything better. Yes, he can have a tantrum
every day occasionally but he is an absolute sweetheart. And the first two years are beautiful.
These people constantly moaning about their kids - I don't get it
For us, having children (a child) is the best thing we ever did
Having kids is the best thing I ever did.
I have a 9yo and a 4yo. They are lovely, funny, bright, interesting, kind. They have an amazing friendship. The 4yo laughs like Sid James when her big sister is joking around with her.
When your child puts their hand in yours, whispers "I love you", scrawled "best mummy" on a picture of you looking like an alien... There's nothing like it.
Congratulations. You are just at the start of the most amazing thing you could ever experience.
Give it a year and you won't be so dismissive of the need to reach out to others about how tough it can be! It is absolutely worth it, but things that are worthwhile usually aren't easy
They bring you new toilet roll when it runs out
@Notapheasantplucker mine go to the shop and buy me chocolate too!
I never really thought i was a maternal person but i can't imagine my life without my dc. It'a amazing to think that you actually create the people you will love more than anything else in the world. It can be tough and there are annoyances along the way but they pale into insignificance against all the love and joy your children bring you.
Ok. They love you more than you've ever been loved before
My son is the tiny little light in my life.
I had three under 4 years old. It was amazing. It was such a sad day when the eldest started school and our little gang was split up.
34 years later and we are all still close in heart and have a fabulous relationship - and they have made me into a mother in law and a granny.
Children are amazing. The best thing ever!
Congratulations- you have so much to look forward to!
(There are some down times but there is such love 💓)
Fully in the midst of the terrible twos but irrotational breakdowns about putting clothes on aside, it's great. Ever seen toddlers dancing? Absolute joy right there. There's new stuff to explore and learn about every day, the silliest things are funny, the cuddles are great.
It's relentless, hard work. Sometimes terrifying. How could it not be, having someone else dependant on you (at least to start with)?
It will change your life in ways you didn't even think of.
But there are rewards every step of the way. My 4yo tells me, DH and his sister that we are beautiful and we loves us every day. He's funny and creative and a stompy wee pain in the butt .
The 13 yo is currently an eye-rolling ball of hormones. But she is hilarious, and caring and lovely. It's wonderful to watch their interest in the world around them and become independent beings.
And they can bring you drinks and snacks, sometimes without even being asked!
Yep my teen dds are the best thing i ever did..we are totally different personality-wise but seem to just bring out the best in each other and we are like best mates.
We travelled extensively (before covid) share same sense of humour and love nature/wildlife and the outdoors..i feel blessed to have them in my life and flattered they consider me a confidante. I think its helped that i've been a strong single parent since they were little-just like a girls club really! good luck with your new arrival-you'll love being a parent.
FTM to a 20wk old here so I can only. As the last of my friends to have a baby, I was subjected daily to "you'll never sleep again", "you don't know what you've done to your life" "it's horrific for the first x years" etc. I got through it by pointing out how they all had more than one child so it can't be that bad!
Now it's the constant "wait til" that irks me. I didn't have the easiest birth but we're fine now, straight away I get "wait til your milk comes in, 8 weeks of agony". Milk came in day 5 and DD Has been guzzling ever since.
Wait til the sleep regression
Wait til she's teething
Wait til she's on solids (nappy related)
No one tells you that you couldn't care less about any of it, because you are so in love with the little person you created you would literally do anything for them! You definitely develop Rose-tinted glasses and believe your child is something really quite spectacular!
Good luck OP! Tune out what you don't want to hear me enjoy this special time!
My 6 year old boy is my best mate . He's kept me going through lockdown and all the negative stuff resulting from that just by being here . Hes my number one and keeps me going , its impossible to feel down around him , he's so happy and lively!
My son is 6 and had a total love of learning and absorbing information. He wants to know about how everything works, when it was made, and then he goes off and draws it. I love his enthusiasm and am genuinely amazed at his capacity to memorise things. He’s a happy, sociable boy who loves his friends and his school.
DD is 3 and a tiny, fiesty little bundle of energy. She is so confident, is an excellent mimic and can’t wait to join her brother at ‘big school’ next year.
My DD is 21 months. She is hilarious! Yes, she is hard work (especially at the minute as I am 33 weeks pregnant) but the sheer joy I get from seeing her happy and laugh and smile and run around is amazing. She is learning so much and it's so fascinating to watch. For me, the newborn phase up to 5 months was rubbish, but she has been great fun since then. Dont listen to the negative stuff. All things in life have ups and downs, but for me anyway, being a parent has more good moments than bad, and that's with a toddler!
My boys are 20 and 24 now. The eldest was trying- on the go all the time, prone to meltdowns, physically beautiful. The younger was a little ray of sunshine and apart from cheekiness, a dream to parent.
They both had struggles along the way but are fabulous- great company, great house mates, independent, sensible people.
There are always going to be tough times, but remember to enjoy the good bits and you'll be fine!
KO2018 my kids are splendid, pretty much my favourite people They're teenagers and preteen now and muck in with the running of the house - they all do laundry, the teens cook if I'm on lates, they put the bins out and unpack the dishwasher. They're also absolutely hilarious and very clever and sporty and can do all sorts of stuff I can't, including speaking another language flawlessly. They say things I'd never have thought of and bring another perspective to life.
My world would definitely be poorer without them, although I was happy without children for the first 30 years of my life too. When they were little they were so heart meltingly cute, and still are sometimes although two of them are taller than me.
Literally the only thing I've hated was the sleep deprivation, which didn't last long with the older two but did with the youngest. My kids never pooed everywhere and two out of three were incredibly easy to toilet train. Toddlers are the most funny and fascinating little creatures. Every stage is pretty amazing so far (eldest is 15).
I love my kids and the family that we create together. They (and dh) are my favourite people to be with.
I am biased but my two are brilliant. DD4 is helpful, kind and articulate. She also talks non-stop and can be grumpy at times. She wasn't a great sleeper as a baby, but has been sleeping well since 1, and didn't give us particular problems with anything else. (She had meltdowns but generally short lived).
DS1 is smiley, affectionate is chatty. He was a terrible sleeper until 1 (ok now) but eats well, plays well, talks and walks well. You tend to see the negative bits on MN as people post when they are struggling. I posted about his sleep, but wouldn't have added the context that the rest of him was brilliant and lots of fun!
My children are hard work but bring lots of joy and fun too. I wouldn't be without them. I am lucky enough to have a great husband too and be generally happy with life e.g. I enjoy my job. I think life circumstances matter too, as if you are struggling with your partner or you are forced to give up work, or forced to work when you don't want to, it makes things harder. Sometimes the challenge of children can be wrapped up in bigger frustrations, and you see that on MN etc.
Good luck. It is DEFINITELY worth it for me.
Please login first.