This is a Premium feature
To use this feature subscribe to Mumsnet Premium - get first access to new features see fewer ads, and support Mumsnet.Start using Mumsnet Premium
Coping with no time to yourself(3 Posts)
My second DS is 9 months old and he has only ever taken a bottle from me and is now going through a very clingy stage. He won’t nap for long anymore as he needs soothing back to sleep often so I can’t really get on with much aswell as not being able to leave him with anyone. If he wakes up and can’t see me he will cry his eyes out. He wakes 2-3 times in the night now and will be in and out of my bed for a cuddle before falling back to sleep.
I feel like I just need a break, I went back to work when my first DS was 7 months old and he was always happy with anyone aslong as he was fed so I didn’t experience this.
I am just getting on with it but having no time of just being myself is beginning to take it’s toll and I can’t see when it is going to change. Is this just something that I am going to have to ride out for aslong as it takes or doesn’t anyone have any tips?
I’m not ok with just leaving him to cry, he doesn’t cry for anything and is happy and smiley all day but only aslong as I am there. He will happily sit with others aslong as I’m there but it’s not the same as getting a break and dream of a day to myself at the moment.
Just to add I did leave him with my partner to get my hair done 2 months ago for a couple of hours but he wouldn’t take a bottle and didn’t really eat until I got home. So leaving the house completely didn’t make him take a bottle either, Partner even put on my dressing gown but didn’t help 🙄😂
Remember - this won't last! 9 months is pretty typical timing for a spot of clingyness, but it won't last forever. I felt like I never got much of a break from DD when she was that age, but she got much more independent as time went on.
I'd leave him with partner a bit more often. If it's only a couple of hours, it won't do him any harm not to have a bottle or eat, but he's 2 months older now, and may take the bottle more happily this time. I don't think a healthy baby will starve itself if food is available! If you want some time, take some time. Start with just a couple of hours if that's all you're happy with, it'll do you the world of good. Get a coffee and read a book!
I would start just leaving him more with partner. At 9months he will be fine a few hours with no bottle if he won’t take it from them, they can just offer food and water instead.
Also remember them crying whilst being left with their father who is looking after them and attending to their needs, trying to soothe, playing with them, taking them for a walk, is very different from ‘cry it out’. They may be crying at some point, but with someone they know rocking and soothing them.
Please login first.