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Feeling lonely since having a new baby(3 Posts)
Hello,since having my little girl 5 weeks ago I feel incredibly lonely.I have 2 other children 7 and 9 and I'm just finding it really difficult atm.My partner works 8-5.30 so i am on my own most of the day and then when he gets home we spend most of the evening eating our tea and sorting the children out for bed.And by the time that's done im ready for bed myself knowing the baby will be up again in a few hours.My partner is really good and helps out with the night feeds but then spends alot of the weekend mornings catching up on sleep which means i am on my own longer and it's past lunch time before we can do anything.I haven't been out with friends/family because I am anxious about my children catching covid 19 which is hard because I haven't had the support I would normally.Is anyone else in a similar position? Should I speak 2 the Dr about medications for postnatal depression? Or is this something that will pass soon.
I think you need to start getting out and about. Your kids are hardly at risk of Covid and having a newborn can be pretty bloody boring! Your big kids will be back at school soon so you and baby can get out to groups and coffee dates and the like.
Also, get your partner to either switch off weekend mornings with you so you both get to "catch up on sleep" or to ditch his lie ins, accept neither of you will catch up on sleep, and enjoy your family time.
You don't have post natal depression from what you describe (but if you really think you do get help).
Assume your kids will be back at school this week? Take your baby out. Go for walks - meet up for socially distanced coffee with friends. Join some sort of group.
You are experiencing what many mums do - I sure did. I found it soooooo boring looking after my babies. I didn't have corona to deal with so I joined a post natal group when my first was three weeks old. I went for a long walk every day and got a coffee at halfway point. I felt I was constantly looking at the clock for when my husband came home. Most of my friends already had kids (I had mine in my 40s) and were back at work full time. I resented my kids for the amount of time they took from me. But they grow, you cope and find things to do. It will get better, but it is a grind, theres no denying that.
Can you talk to your husband about how you feel and see if you can organise some activities at the weekend? I'm sure your children will benefit great as well as you. My husband took the kids swimming every saturday morning, leaving me with a good three hours I could do what I wanted. Then we went out as a family on Sunday. You can do that - even with Corona.
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