DH and I have been struggling with our relationship for a while now, and things have gotten worse since DS was born. We both agreed not to argue in front of him, but there have been three or four occasions since he arrived where we’ve had raised voices. I feel absolutely terrible about this and so guilty and worried that it’ll affect DS, who is only four months old. He’s generally a smiley happy baby, but could hearing our arguments have impacted him?
At four months honestly, he’s fine. He won’t notice or understand. But if you and your husband are struggling it would be good to try to address that sooner rather than later - for you as much as for your boy. And don’t be too hard on yourself about the times you’ve had raised voices, you need to be kind to yourself when you have a young baby as everything can be pretty relentless.
My DS had two and a half years of it. Very stressed out mum and baby. Took me a long time to settle him after his dad moved out but we got there. We are so close now and he is a great teenager.
We made a decision not to hide all our arguments from the kids. I grew up in a house where I never saw my parents argue. I think it’s healthy to sometimes see parents fall out and reconcile and forgive rather than having a falsely perfect relationship. I grew up afraid of conflict and with false ideals, although my parents were fantastic, it wasn’t real.
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