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Parenting

Is it easier once they can walk?

23 replies

YellowEllis · 05/07/2020 10:36

I feel awful saying it but I'm so fed up of being stuck at home with my 12 month old. This pandemic has felt like years, it was ok when it was sunny but now it's raining almost every day. He's getting too heavy for the sling, but he doesn't like being in the buggy, he just wants to cruise and climb so even on sunny days being outside is hard. I feel like we spend all our time sat in the front room. I do sit and play with him but I feel like I'm having to force myself and I'm so bored. I want to enjoy him more but I think lots of that enjoyment was coming from being out and about and seeing him interact with friends/family. Everything just feels tedious. I'm hoping walking will come soon, will that change everything? I'm telling myself everyday it will, but if it won't please say as I want to be realistic.

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Anewmum2018 · 05/07/2020 10:40

Oh it does (in my opinion) get lots funner. I’m the same, don’t really enjoy just being stuck indoors playing, and especially at that age they can’t even really play for very long without getting bored. I’m much more enjoying the walking stage especially now that lockdown is easing. In fact the walking stage has coincided with my son learning to talk, and I almost actually am enjoying rather than enduring the days! Lockdown has been very hard on parents of little kids- everyone’s supposed to enjoy being with them all day, but in reality it’s absolutely mind numbing sometimes. It gets better and funner x

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Mathbath · 05/07/2020 10:41

It's ok.
It's physically easier as less carrying but more demanding of attention. Shopping is a nightmare as are crowded areas, bikes and scooters. It's easiest when they are in a buggy.
Get a buggy board or those push trike types?

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Fatted · 05/07/2020 10:52

I'd say between 1 and 2 is a difficult age. It's not really any easier/better when they're walking because they take ages to walk, they can't walk far, they have no sense of awareness and then they get fed up half way around and demand to be carried for the rest of the trip.

I think lockdown is your issue. At this age, I loved things like soft play or visiting family. Places we could get out of the house, but I knew they were safe to play and explore.

Does he have a push along trike? My eldest loved his at this age, it was less restricted that the buggy. Do you have a garden OP? Could you get things like a push along walker, play table and put them outside for them to play with? I had two quite close together and ended up with quite a lot of Vtech stuff as presents. We had the push along walker, a walker/ride on train, a ride on bike and a table. When the weather was nice I used to drag that outside for a while for them to play with.

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Teacaketotty · 05/07/2020 10:57

Didn’t want to read and run as I am in the exact same position with my nearly 1 year old. As are a lot of people based on the amount of threads I’ve seen of people struggling to entertain in the house etc so you are not alone!

I think we feel guilt as we are supposed to enjoy spending the time with them but it very hard to entertain for long. I feel I spend most of the day trying to keep DD happy and entertained or dragging her away from things. She has been pretty grumpy lately as I know shes keen to walk but can’t yet similar to the frustration before she started crawling.

She’s also on one nap a day so more awake time, I’ve tried to split the days down if I can and get out for a walk even for 20 mins if it’s nice enough.

I don’t have any words of wisdom as I have this exact problem but know you are not alone, I’m hoping it gets easier however I fear when she can walk she’ll be even harder to catch Confused

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KenDodd · 05/07/2020 11:12

With regard playing with him. I heard a child expert on the radio once saying that parents don't have to play with there children and shouldn't feel guilty for not doing. He said the idea that parents should sit and play with children is very new and only exists within middle class parents in the west and that throughout human history and access every culture parents have never played with their children. He said that when parent do play with children they report feeling bored, they inevitably take over (even when they think they don't) so the child doesn't get to lead, also children copy what adults do, not the other way round. Anyway, he said read to/with them, cuddle them, play them if you want but don't feel guilty for not playing with them, playing with them won't promote their development.

I felt so happy when I heard this!!! Freedom from the boredom of playing with them or guilt of not playing with them.

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YellowEllis · 05/07/2020 11:49

Yes. I think lockdown is definitely the issue. I just feel like I'm doing it all wrong! Thanks for the suggestions, will look into them

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Sevo7 · 05/07/2020 12:07

I was desperate for DD to walk so we could do more, especially during lockdown and she’s been crawling forever. She finally started walking at 17 months.

Is it any better? Slightly but we don’t exactly have the lovely walks out I envisaged. Regardless of where we go she has to stop every 5 seconds to examine something or run off in the opposite direction and will sit down every couple of minutes to play with a stone or some mud. She won’t walk far and insists I carry her. She never had a problem with the pushchair before walking but now screams to get out then wants to be carried after walking 10 meters which has now made nice long walks out impossible Confused

It’s definitely nice that she can explore and be more independent but it’s hard work and not always enjoyable as it seems to take an age to get anywhere. I’m hoping it will be more fun when she can walk further, isn’t distracted by every individual stone or sweet wrapper and can follow instructions like “this way please” Smile

We also seem to spend a lot of time inside and I find playing quite boring. I was never a big fan of toddler groups, soft play and swimming but I’d give anything to be able to break the days up with things like that at the moment!

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Caspianberg · 05/07/2020 12:20

Do you have a garden OP? Its easier in own outdoor space atm as you can let him play freely. If you do, maybe look at picking up some small garden equipment he can play on like toddler climb frames, small slide, water play

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Aria999 · 05/07/2020 14:33

@KenDodd

Can you remember who it was? I would like to read something if they have a book or articles.

I often tell DS(4) that my parents never played with me and I'm happy to read him a story or do an activity but he's desperate for me to join in his imaginative play and I'm terrible at it.

Poor kid is pretty bored and lonely from lockdown and I feel bad.

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KenDodd · 05/07/2020 14:50

I can't remember. It was about ten years ago. He's right though about thinking we must play with our children being a middle class western notion. One feature of these lives though is isolation, we're not living hand in glove with loads of other kids around in big groups that all play together.

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surreygirl1987 · 06/07/2020 14:02

I found it a million times easier when he started walking overall, but it did have it's new challenges too like tantrums if he didn't get to walk wherever he wanted!

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Rubyroost · 06/07/2020 16:46

@KenDodd can you tell my 2. 5 year old that. When he was 10 months he seemed fairly happy playing on his own, now he wants me to sit and play with him all the time!!

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FizzingWhizzbee123 · 06/07/2020 19:01

Personally I found it A LOT easier once my DS could walk.

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HMSSophie · 06/07/2020 19:11

It's actually only easier once they leave home and even then, only when you manage to forget about them

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passthemustard · 06/07/2020 19:22

It's awful from when they start walking til they go to school.

Actually my eldest is about to go to uni and still waiting for it to get better.

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Marmite27 · 06/07/2020 19:24

Walking and talking we’re key points for my two. They became much happier children once they could move and express themselves. All they did was whine upto that point which was rather grating.

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NoliteTeBastardesCarborundorum · 06/07/2020 20:13

Yes! So much easier. Opens up a whole world of outdoor play, particularly now playgrounds are open again.

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LolaLollypop · 06/07/2020 20:46

1-2yrs is an absolute pleasure. Old enough to run around and play, young enough to do as mummy says.
2-3yrs (as per my DD) is a whole nother matter....!!

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BertieBotts · 06/07/2020 20:50

Yes absolutely. Once they can reliably walk outside (which is different from having taken the first wobbly steps) it does become easier as long as you are willing/able to treat them like a dog and have at least one, possibly 2 walks a day. Improves their sleep, appetite, mood, your possibilities.

Tip: Keep a beady eye on Lidl/Aldi for their children's mud dungarees - they are brilliant and so much cheaper than expensive "puddle suits".

But lockdown is tedious, interacting with friends/family/other DC is also what makes small children interesting to me.

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tempnamechange98765 · 06/07/2020 21:45

Yes I think so, 100%. DC2 started walking early on in lockdown, about 4 weeks in, and it's been so much better for us all since then. More fun, and the walks are more fun for him too as he's not stuck in the pushchair.

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Sewinginscotland · 06/07/2020 21:51

I still have my 21mo in a sling most days - have you managed to get them on your back? That's a game changer.

I can't remember walking making it particularly easier, but mine was a very fast crawler! It sounds like yours will enjoy being able to walk. There's always a phase, and it always feels like we're waiting for the next one.

I've generally found that it's getting easier as he's getting older. Yes, toddlers bring their own unique challenges, but he's able to do and understand so much more (plus sleeps through the night).

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Sailingblue · 07/07/2020 21:39

Yes and no. Mine is 15m now and loves pottering around and she really enjoys going out to places she can walk around and explore. The harder bit is she doesn’t want to walk where I want her to and her personality has now developed into being really naughty.

My first was basically an angel (other than the odd tantrum) until she hit 3 and was a really challenging threenager. I think all ages come with different challenges and each month during lockdown one of the other one has been harder. At the moment, it’s the 15m old that’s the challenge.

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LL82 · 07/07/2020 22:00

I’ve found lockdown very difficult at times and my son is now 15 months. He turned 1 in lockdown and started to walk. I’ve found it much easier since then (apart from a few bad falls) we go on long walks with the pram and he gets out to do some walking, today we have finally been to a play park and he loves going to see animals and toddling around to have a look. Lockdown has been super tough....be kind to yourself xxx

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