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For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Parenting

I'm haveing a hard time accepting that my baby won't be EBF anymore cause she needs solids soon

19 replies

Jaz12345x · 02/07/2020 20:50

Maybe I'm being too emotional but I love breastfeeding, its helped me solidify me and my babies bond. In the beginning the struggle to breastfeed worsened my PND but it also pulled me out of it and helped me form a strong bond with my baby. I anticipate breastfeeding every day because I love how connected and bonded I feel with her.

I'm haveing a hard time accepting that my baby will be on solids soon, she just turned 5 months and I know the time will come where I can't put it off any longer. I've given her some solids here and there like carrots and fruit purees but only as a treat, but soon it'll be a regular thing and a replacement for my milk. It makes me sad 😔
.Has anyone else had similar feelings?

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icedaisy · 02/07/2020 20:54

Sort of.

I was really sad when I did stop BF, but I think it's easier as they get bigger.

Even when you start food at six months or whenever you can keep feeding for years. I think for me once she was running around and no longer a baby, but a little toddler it became much easier to stop.

Teeth helped as well!

Just keep enjoying it for now, no rush.

Messageinateacup · 02/07/2020 20:55

Good lord. If it's any help, milk will still be the main food needed for the rest of the first year. My last dc Bfed until he was almost four! You are not at an end unless you want to be.

Jaz12345x · 02/07/2020 20:55

Plus I've had a lot of pressure to feed my baby solids, especially of the mil. Even at 2months it was being brought up and I stupidly gave in to the pressure and fed her at 3 months. Since then ive only done it after 4 months as a treat. i think the MIL is waiting for me to feed her so she can babysit, I never bottle fed even after all the pressure she gave me to do that to. When I'm asked and say she's not on food yet, i get a judgey reply asking lots of questions. The pressure of others to feed her solids isn't helping me

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ReySky · 02/07/2020 20:56

I feel the same. DS is 6.5 months and one month into his weaning journey. I love breastfeeding and the bond it has given us. He still feeds about 5 times a day and several times overnight, but I felt jealous / sad seeing him eating his baby porridge and enjoying it so much and wanting more, which I know sounds utterly ridiculous. I just try and think I can still go on feeding another year or longer, even if it's once a day, if he wants to. Milk is still their main source of nutrition till they're around one year old, but you've done a great job getting this far with breastfeeding and you can still bond in lots of other ways, lots of cuddles etc. Good luck with the feeding journey

Jaz12345x · 02/07/2020 20:57

Your right I have a long way to go till I have to stop breastfeeding, I never thought of it that way.

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Jaz12345x · 02/07/2020 20:58

Thanks :) it's nice knowing I'm not the only one who feels like this x

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Foldinthecheese · 02/07/2020 21:01

It becomes different as they get older, though. My 18mo is still breastfeeding and now it’s more about comfort and security, and I like that I can give that to her. In some ways it feels even nicer because she can get her nutrition anywhere, but only I can give her the reassurance and sense of safety that she gets from breastfeeding.

Emeeno1 · 02/07/2020 21:02

I'm still breastfeeding my two and a half year old and you still get the lovely closeness and time to stroke her hair and tell her I love her. Then she jumps off my lap and runs into the kitchen shouting 'biscuit!'

Don't think you are losing anything, actually you are gaining so many new and lovely experiences together!

Messageinateacup · 02/07/2020 21:03

Right you need to get your big girl pants on here and decide from now on you're doing only what's best for your dc, based on the latest scientific advice. Don't be swayed by anyone who tries to make you do things that are not good for your child. Let them "win" over that ridiculous jumper or whatever, not things like sleep/weaving/potty training or education. I didn't give either of mine any solids till 6 months as that was (might still be?) the guidance. If you say "this is what I've decided", "times have changed", "my HV recommends.." etc in a firm voice and then don't discuss it further (obviously the baby's dad has a say too, if he's done his research).

SlimGin · 02/07/2020 21:03

As others have said your breastfeeding journey isn't over until you're both ready. After I returned to work I still did breastfed DD before sleep. It was just once a night but it made it special - part of the bedtime routine that helped her drift off.

Even now DD is on solids we can still bond - we have our meals together and I talk to her about what we're eating. Also there's something really lovely about preparing a meal for your child (when you have time!) - cutting things in to cute shapes and making it look fun! Obviously a lot of the time she makes a mess or I don't have time and just bang it all on the plate, but eating together is something I treasure as much as breastfeeding.

SlimGin · 02/07/2020 21:03

As others have said your breastfeeding journey isn't over until you're both ready. After I returned to work I still did breastfed DD before sleep. It was just once a night but it made it special - part of the bedtime routine that helped her drift off.

Even now DD is on solids we can still bond - we have our meals together and I talk to her about what we're eating. Also there's something really lovely about preparing a meal for your child (when you have time!) - cutting things in to cute shapes and making it look fun! Obviously a lot of the time she makes a mess or I don't have time and just bang it all on the plate, but eating together is something I treasure as much as breastfeeding.

SlimGin · 02/07/2020 21:04

As others have said your breastfeeding journey isn't over until you're both ready. After I returned to work I still breastfed DD before sleep. It was just once a night but it made it special - part of the bedtime routine that helped her drift off.

Even now DD is on solids we can still bond - we have our meals together and I talk to her about what we're eating. Also there's something really lovely about preparing a meal for your child (when you have time!) - cutting things in to cute shapes and making it look fun! Obviously a lot of the time she makes a mess or I don't have time and just bang it all on the plate, but eating together is something I treasure as much as breastfeeding.

rachael12345 · 02/07/2020 21:04

God ridiculous Mil! Ignore her from now on. One of the main things about becoming a mother I feel is deciding to do it your own way.

No need to stop feeding, so many more people feed for years than many realise - because they do it privately - it's conpletely no one else business.

It gets better - just wait til they can tell you how much they love it, which is their favourite boobie and what it tastes of!

And don't let your Mil babysit until you're completely ready to leave the babe either. When I was having similar stresses I read a fab book by Dr sears - most of his stuff is good . The advice was if anyone wants you to do x or y - and ypu don't but feel you need weight to your argument why not. Say 'my doctor told me' but don't elaborate obv it's just ypur book doctor but it worked for me.

SlimGin · 02/07/2020 21:04

Oops sorry for triple post really awful internet!

Lockdownseperation · 02/07/2020 21:06

NHS advise is to not give any solids before 6 months so you still have a while to wait. My baby is 1 is 2 weeks time and still has better 6 and 8 feeds a day. The WHO recommends you bf for a minimum of 2 years. Starting to give food is definitely not the end of bf.

mynameiscalypso · 02/07/2020 21:07

We FF so I didn't have the emotional connection so much but I have to say, one of the things that gives me greatest joy in the world is watching DS shovel something that I've made into his mouth with such enthusiasm and excitement. The way he explores new textures and tastes is endlessly fascinating and the way his face lights up when he realises he likes something is just amazing. Quite often, he spends the whole mealtime sitting there giggling to himself because he's so happy (in between the afore mentioned shovelling) and it's brilliant.

Jamhandprints · 02/07/2020 21:10

I felt like this too! But actually DD is 2 now and has never been that interested in food and still breastfeeds a lot, day and night. I'm ready for her to eat more now but today she just had a bite of cheese, a spoonful of weetabix and a banana. She just wanted "milkies".

Readyme · 02/07/2020 21:16

I remember feeling like this but my DC still fed loads so much so I had to enter into negotiations with her when she was 3.5 years to stop. She bargained hard and got herself a new toy and a cinema trip.

1940s · 02/07/2020 21:17

@Jamhandprints does she regularly eat that little? At 2 food should be their main source of nutrition. I breastfeed my 2+ year old so am very pro breastfeeding. But at 2 breastmilk shouldn't come instead of food

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