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Looking for reassurance

(10 Posts)
HarryHarry Sun 24-May-20 01:11:27

My daughter is 7 months old. She is our second child, so naturally she hasn’t had as much attention, nurturing or stimulation as her older sibling, though we’ve tried our best. But she has been very responsive when we try to talk/play with/read to/sing to her. Often she will not make eye contact at all. We literally have to bend over backwards to get her to smile or laugh. She really only seems to enjoy being thrown in the air. Also the only noise she ever makes (apart from crying) is a funny little growl.

Is this normal?

Did anyone else have a child like this who turned out to be fine? What were they like when they were older?

Lynda07 Sun 24-May-20 02:32:17

Does your older child not play with her, show her attention? I would have thought having a 'big' brother or sister would afford some stimulation.

Try reading, showing her pictures in books and singing with hand movements to music, etc. Make sure you talk to her a lot and have her with you when you are doing things, chatting at the same time.

I'm sure she'll be fine, I expect she's crawling about and investigating at seven months. If you are worried in a month or so, mention it when you next take her to the baby clinic.

Malysh Sun 24-May-20 02:42:20

I totally understand how you feel but I think seven months is a bit young to have any idea whether there's an issue. You may have a clearer picture by 12 month though even that is really young. Kids do not grow in the same way or hit milestones at the same time.

I also wouldn't feel guilty about lack of interaction, think about kids who have ten siblings - by necessity they get less 1:1 attention than single children but they usually turn out just fine. Don't have unrealistic expectations for yourself !

Keep doing what you're doing (reading stories, talking to her, etc), try not to worry too much and give it time !

Malysh Sun 24-May-20 02:45:30

PS - I found parenting very hard at first and I freely admit I was not the best but my son is a wonderful little boy despite my abysmal performance as a parent. So even if there does turn out to be any issue (which is far from a given at this point !) remember that it is in no way your fault.

HarryHarry Sun 24-May-20 02:47:42

Thanks @Malysh.

@Lynda07 The older one is 2 so he is sort of busy doing his own thing. He was a very responsive baby who loved books, music, games, jokes. She is the complete opposite. We have tried many different ways to engage her but she is just not interested. In fact she actually cries when I try to read to her and turns away when I try to play with her.

HarryHarry Sun 24-May-20 02:49:04

Oops I just realized that should say “she HASN’T been very responsive” in my OP.

Annaminna Sun 24-May-20 11:17:08

The good thing is that you noticed that something is unusual.
Yes, your child is showing signs of early childhood autism.
Autism with normal intelligence will not be anything to be ovely worried. You child will be introvert, likes less socializing than siblings but it that so bad? He/she might have talents others doesn't. He/she will have higher ability for details and longer attention span. He/she can be very successful in areas he is interested about. We all don't have to be party animals?

HarryHarry Sun 24-May-20 12:50:13

I never suggested that we did.

What I asked is if it was normal.

Rosebud1302 Sun 24-May-20 22:23:40

Sorry OP I don't have any advice but.....@Annaminna really?! She's 7 months old!!! Talk about scaremongering jeez!!!

Quackersandcheese3 Sun 24-May-20 23:03:24

I think it is normal and all children are different. Both my children were the opposite of each other at that stage of their development. So don’t worry.

I think @Annaminna was just highlighting the fact that if there is anything else going on e.g autism or other neurodiverse diagnosis your DD will be fine.

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