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Breastfeeding in public

(19 Posts)
Benny88 Thu 13-Feb-20 11:28:09

I always prefered to breastfeed my son in private and was constantly critised for it!!! I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not at all against woman breastfeeding in public. We love in a small town and it just seemed that everyone used to make fun of me, I just used to think, mind your own business, what's it got to do with you!!! Am I the only one in this modern world who still breastfed in private?

Shahlalala Thu 13-Feb-20 11:30:04

I’ve had the odd reaction but if I breastfed in private I would barely go out as DS feeds loads. He’s DC2 so I can’t avoid being out!

The problem is the people ‘making fun’, they need to be educate themselves.

Shahlalala Thu 13-Feb-20 11:30:44

Do they make fun that you want to do it in private? Or that you do it in public?

OnlyFoolsnMothers Thu 13-Feb-20 11:32:56

no issues with what you want to do- as the poster above said, if I had done that I would never have gone out.
I was fine breastfeeding in public, usually under my top which I felt was discreet anyway. I guess some people feel you arent "helping the cause"

Hangingtrousers Thu 13-Feb-20 11:35:31

Feed where you want...
I feed everywhere and anywhere and don't give a flying fuck what others think because I'm not 14.

BecauseReasons Thu 13-Feb-20 11:43:27

Maybe they're trying to show you that no one would mind if you did want to feed out and about? Is it just gentle ribbing or out and out mocking?

RedPandaFluff Thu 13-Feb-20 11:47:33

I prefer to feed in private too, but that's my own issue rather than external influences or pressures. I've always been a bit shy and body-conscious.

Having said that, if I need to feed DD, I'll do it, wherever.

It's just a personal preference.

bananallamas Thu 13-Feb-20 11:47:56

I understand why some people feel more comfortable feeding in private. I don't care if people look at me or stare etc but i accept that takes confidence and not everyone may feel that way.

However I have had friends who are quite frustrating because they will basically never leave the house while DC are small in case they have to feed. Or we have to only go to certain places that have feeding rooms, or if baby needs feeding unexpectedly then they will rush home because they can't feed in public. It becomes difficult to do much.

dannydyerismydad Thu 13-Feb-20 11:50:05

I think most of us prefer to feed at home. You can make yourself comfy and not have to worry about how much flesh you're getting out (or not).

However if baby needed feeding I would feed. I prefer the risk of flashing a nipple to the yell of a hungry baby any day. And mine could yell.

SoupDragon Thu 13-Feb-20 12:00:10

With my first I preferred to breastfeed him in private. With DS2 I had to feed in public or DS1 would not have been able to go anywhere. With DD I couldn't care less and fed her wherever and when ever smile

BecauseReasons Thu 13-Feb-20 12:04:02

not have to worry about how much flesh you're getting out (or not)

Ha. I whip the whole boob out there- the only bit that's obscured is the nipple (and even that ends up on show prior to latch and as I'm putting away). 🤷

Barracker Thu 13-Feb-20 12:07:25

Who are the people who are making fun of you, and constantly criticising you? Do you mean your family?

I'm a bit confused from your post. I've never heard of someone being criticised for breastfeeding privately at home before! Everyone who breastfeeds does it in privacy sometimes, because there isn't always an audience. Many are fighting to be able to do it publicly too without attracting criticism, but it certainly isn't compulsory!

I think it's really important to squash criticism of public breastfeeding, as it's an absolute right of women to choose this, but as you say, you're supportive of other women publicly breastfeeding, you just don't want to choose it yourself for your own reasons. And you certainly do not need to explain those reasons to anyone.

Who is the constant criticism coming from, and how is it phrased? It isn't acceptable to criticise a mother's feeding choices.

MotherofKitties Thu 13-Feb-20 12:21:01

I never fed in public, I simply wasn't comfortable with it so I didn't do it. Only breastfed for 8 weeks and then my LO went on formula, so after that it wasn't an issue anyway.

In the end I didn't give a damn what other people thought when it came to how I fed my baby. It's none of their business and I suggest you take the same attitude smile

ToTravelIsToLive Thu 13-Feb-20 14:00:50

I don't think it matters where you feed as long as your baby is fed. When you become a mum everybody has an opinion on everything you do. your damned if you do and if you don't. Time with my baby is too short and precious for me to pay any attention to most opinions

DesLynamsMoustache Thu 13-Feb-20 14:04:30

It's fine to choose not to feed in public, but no one should be shaming for you doing so. I personally had no issues feeding my DD in public and I've fed her in libraries, shops, restaurants, cafes, the supermarket, a park bench... It would have limited our lives too much to have to feed in private, but I do understand why others might be anxious about it.

I will say, though, that I don't think anyone has ever really noticed, much less cared, anywhere I've fed. I've never had any funny looks or comments. Life has just carried on as usual. I really think the vast, vast majority of people barely even register it.

DappledThings Thu 13-Feb-20 23:12:29

I never made any plans around breastfeeding. If we were out we were out. If I was at home I was at home.

Especially in the early days when it can be so frequent. I would hate to have felt I had to be tied to the house so I just cracked on, never had an issue feeding anywhere.

If you are deliberately limiting where you go and what you do because you have to time being at home when you need to feed I would think you are pointlessly making your life both over-complicated and smaller than it needs to be. I could imagine trying to address this initially by trying to make it light hearted teasing to gauge the waters but I would really be quite concerned.

Bookworm83 Fri 14-Feb-20 03:57:06

I haven't had my baby yet (due in March), but I'm also planning to breastfeed in private. I don't care if that means not getting out of the house much. I have social anxiety and 100% prefer to stay in anyway whenever I have a choice.

crazydiamond222 Fri 14-Feb-20 04:13:56

I used to feed my 4 month old in public places but he now makes me feel really self conscious as he is constantly wiggling around, coming off the breast to look around and feeding really loudly. When out I now tend to feed either in the car or in the toilet. I wish I didn't feel the need to do this and I was more confident feeding him. It seems to get harder as he gets older.

Nowayorhighway Fri 14-Feb-20 16:36:32

I’ve done it all over in the past and I don’t even think anyone has noticed. There are ways of discreetly feeding and I don’t mean hiding the baby under a blanket or anything weird!

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