Mental Health and Parenting

[Glitterbugblue]

I just read a 2013 regarding whether parenting can cause mental health to worsten. I was looking because I have had depression all my life and am currently in a low and have missed parents evening. I am so cross as I had a note in my phone and read it this morning...but then just forgot! Did 8 hours work...went to swimming...youngest got his 5 meter backstroke...I chatted to a lovely mum and smiled but all the time I just wanted to crawl into bed or take a magic pill so I could feel like me again. Then my oldest son said...."did you know it was parents evening tonight". Feel such a blimming flunkie. It's been a long three weeks since I started on this particular downer and I cannot wait to feel semi-human again. If anyone else can relate, please say, as part of my brain attacking me is that I feel like no-one else is like that....that it is just me. I want to tick all the good parent boxes....want to feel more in control. Not possible right now.

I am taking meds and have a really positive outlook generally, realistic but I don't bitch and moan about life....life is a precious gift and you need to put in to get out....but I cannot control this. I am "one in four" and having a rough few weeks.

DH isn't brilliant, he has his issues too.

My beautiful boys are the light of my life but oh for a week at a meditation resort somewhere hot with beautiful scenery and lots of rest, lovely food and me time. I would be a new woman. I would spend a few hours getting some new clothes and reading some silly trashy magazines...I would run my ass off and feel great afterwards.

Seriously though, parenting is so so hard....all the administration alongside everything else...especially when your brain is making every action slow, a drag, such hard work, when you keep bloody forgetting things. . I know how that feels and its seriously bloody hard. I can feel so empty and low and I don't have hoards of mummy friemds to lean on. I have a few gorgeous friends but I am not the archetypal popular school mummy....I feel quite awkward in the playground....often when I feel like shite and find it hard to banter and chat.

Tomorrow is a new day. Fingers crossed I will wake up less black dog...more the version of me which is breezy.

[OhamIreally]

I'm sorry you've had no replies to your post.

Maybe some people find parenting easy but I think it's incredibly difficult and the admin involved on top of working full time is horrendous.

I'm using my work Outlook calendar and a paper calendar and still can't keep on top of things.

Don't make things worse for yourself by thinking you're struggling- you're not. It really is this fucking hard.

[MandKsMam]

I have depression and social anxiety. I'm waiting for a 'diagnosis' which I have a feeling will be borderline personality disorder from the questions I was being asked at my 1 of 2 doctor's appts.

I totally get u. My memory is shot and if things aren't written down on the calendar, I don't know about them. My other half is help with this admin side of things, he has no interest so is left all to me.

I fine parenting impossible some days. I'm walking about the house non-stop wvery single day and I'm sick of it. A few months ago I experienced burn-out. Some days I feel exactly the same as u, I just want ro relax. How old are your children? Mine are 4, 2 and 8 months. I have no friends or family nearby so isolation/loneliness is a big reason for my depression. I have no friends or family to turn to in times of crisis, which happened when my baby was 1 week and 2 weeks old, which I still hold a lot of anger about. I have ok days and rock bottom days, very rarely good days. Only lastnight I felt suicidal but this morning I'm ok.

But please, do speak to your gp or health visitor if it feels on a decline. When my first was born, I didn't act upon my HV saying I need to see someone. I left it til I was rock bottom and mow I regret not getting help sooner. Tablets alone don't always help the underlying problem